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rsr143's review against another edition
2.0
Listened to the audiobook version. The overarching concept of being vs having is a powerful one. However the book is overly formal and psychoanalytical in nature. It does a good job of dispelling the belief some may have in "new age gurus" to lead one to enlightenment and instead indicates that the key to personal fulfillment lies in self awareness (through meditation and self analysis) and the casting away of a consumerist lifestyle hell bent on defining ones life by acquisition of things and achievement of goals/outcomes. I don't recommend this book unless you are a psychiatrist or fascinated with related topics. For a reader interested in a general personal development oriented book it is too arcanely written.
kevin_shepherd's review against another edition
4.0
Fromm defines “Being” as a mode of existence (MoE) where an individual's focus is on growing, loving, and advancing toward self-realization. In contrast, “Having” refers to a state where an individual relates to the world, including his occupation and his relationships with other people, in an acquisitive and controlling manner.
In Fromm’s view, there is an existential scale where “being” resides at one end and “having” resides at the other. At the one extreme are the altruists (Mahatma Gandhi, Frans de Waal, etc.) and at the other extreme sit the narcissists (Benito Mussolini, Donald Trump, etc.). The rest of us fall somewhere in between.
The State of Having/The Idolization and Hoarding of Wealth
When Fromm states, “The most detestable, dishonest, unscrupulous and stupid man can be brought to honor with money,” he echoes Marx…
“I am ugly, but I can buy for myself the most beautiful of women. Therefore I am not ugly, for the effect of ugliness - its deterrent power - is nullified by money. I, in my character as an individual, am lame, but money furnishes me with twenty-four feet. Therefore I am not lame. I am bad, dishonest, unscrupulous, stupid; but money is honoured (sic), and therefore so is its possessor. Money is the supreme good, therefore its possessor is good. Money, besides, saves me the trouble of being dishonest: I am therefore presumed honest. I am stupid, but money is the real mind…” ~Karl Marx
So, how do we move ourselves toward a better, more balanced state of being? I am so glad you asked! The first step, according to the book of Fromm, is seeing ourselves (and those in our sphere of awareness) for what we really are.
“…we are influenced by the idea that increased schooling is commensurate with increased intellectual and artistic activity, but this is by no means so. Our education is not conducive to increased thinking or the development of active imagination. The average man today thinks very little for himself. He remembers data as presented by the schools and the mass media. He knows practically nothing of what he knows by his own observing or thinking… nor does modern man, including the educated groups, think about religious, philosophical or even political problems. He ordinarily adopts one or the other of the many clichés offered him by political or religious books or speakers, but the conclusions are not arrived at as the result of active and penetrating thinking of his own. He chooses the cliché that appeals most to his own character and social class”
Once we acknowledge that many (most? all?) of our judgements and perceptions are not deduced from a critical analysis of our own doing, we can start to shift ourselves from assembly-line automatons to thinking, living, human beings.
The simple message to us all:
We have the potential to be so much more than what we are. Happiness is not something to be pursued. It is not a commodity obtained by material abundance or the domination of nature. Happiness is simply a state of being. It is where we are when we move beyond the paradigm of “I am what I have,” and come to know “I am what I am.”
In Fromm’s view, there is an existential scale where “being” resides at one end and “having” resides at the other. At the one extreme are the altruists (Mahatma Gandhi, Frans de Waal, etc.) and at the other extreme sit the narcissists (Benito Mussolini, Donald Trump, etc.). The rest of us fall somewhere in between.
The State of Having/The Idolization and Hoarding of Wealth
When Fromm states, “The most detestable, dishonest, unscrupulous and stupid man can be brought to honor with money,” he echoes Marx…
“I am ugly, but I can buy for myself the most beautiful of women. Therefore I am not ugly, for the effect of ugliness - its deterrent power - is nullified by money. I, in my character as an individual, am lame, but money furnishes me with twenty-four feet. Therefore I am not lame. I am bad, dishonest, unscrupulous, stupid; but money is honoured (sic), and therefore so is its possessor. Money is the supreme good, therefore its possessor is good. Money, besides, saves me the trouble of being dishonest: I am therefore presumed honest. I am stupid, but money is the real mind…” ~Karl Marx
So, how do we move ourselves toward a better, more balanced state of being? I am so glad you asked! The first step, according to the book of Fromm, is seeing ourselves (and those in our sphere of awareness) for what we really are.
“…we are influenced by the idea that increased schooling is commensurate with increased intellectual and artistic activity, but this is by no means so. Our education is not conducive to increased thinking or the development of active imagination. The average man today thinks very little for himself. He remembers data as presented by the schools and the mass media. He knows practically nothing of what he knows by his own observing or thinking… nor does modern man, including the educated groups, think about religious, philosophical or even political problems. He ordinarily adopts one or the other of the many clichés offered him by political or religious books or speakers, but the conclusions are not arrived at as the result of active and penetrating thinking of his own. He chooses the cliché that appeals most to his own character and social class”
Once we acknowledge that many (most? all?) of our judgements and perceptions are not deduced from a critical analysis of our own doing, we can start to shift ourselves from assembly-line automatons to thinking, living, human beings.
The simple message to us all:
We have the potential to be so much more than what we are. Happiness is not something to be pursued. It is not a commodity obtained by material abundance or the domination of nature. Happiness is simply a state of being. It is where we are when we move beyond the paradigm of “I am what I have,” and come to know “I am what I am.”
thejdizzler's review against another edition
5.0
Another banger from Erich Fromm. Distinguishes between the being (think Buddhist monk) and having (think consumer) mode of existence, and various reasons why being is superior to having. Also provides practical tips to focus more on the being mode, such as meditation and cessation of multitasking.
I will be periodically revisiting this to try and improve my life.
I will be periodically revisiting this to try and improve my life.
mnemon's review against another edition
5.0
It helps to see the direction from “I am what I have” to “I am what I am” with a stop in between at “I am what I do”.
baralillaannie's review against another edition
3.0
Interesting book with loads of fascinating topics and tips. Loved when he talked about loneliness and also that most of our conversations are monologues, the importance of sometimes listening instead of talking. The topic of trivial talk, attitude that is only focused on the surface. All people has a need to be listened to and to listen. The question of how you remain alone without being lonely.
glamdemon2004's review against another edition
i would’ve enjoyed this more if i had a physical copy instead of listening to it
aidaniamb's review against another edition
3.0
3.7, almost a four.
This was really good. I'm following up by reading the book that these chapters were written for "To Be and To Have". And I'll definitely be reading more of his books. Much of the book was very insightful but due to perhaps his timeframe, the unpolished nature of some of these essays, and my general lack of context, some of the larger chapters on faux spirituality or meditation didn't zing with me much. Although it was all informative. Learning Freud and Marx through him and his personalist/existential lens has been really valuable.
This was really good. I'm following up by reading the book that these chapters were written for "To Be and To Have". And I'll definitely be reading more of his books. Much of the book was very insightful but due to perhaps his timeframe, the unpolished nature of some of these essays, and my general lack of context, some of the larger chapters on faux spirituality or meditation didn't zing with me much. Although it was all informative. Learning Freud and Marx through him and his personalist/existential lens has been really valuable.
_sofiia_'s review against another edition
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0