Reviews tagging Suicide
bookish_wanderer's review against another edition
I'm actually not sure if I can to gather my thoughts well enough do this book justice. Let's try.
You might have heard of Chanel in the past but did not know her name. You knew her as the victim in a high-profile sexual assault case in the US, a victim of a "promising swimmer". Now Chanel wants to reclaim her identity and be known for the survivor she is, and oh so much more.
She's such a gifted writer, and the way she conveys her emotions, the anguish, the pain, and everything she and her family went through at the time is brilliantly done. It's raw, intimate and honest. It'll make you scream, cry and sometimes even laugh, as she also shares some lovely memories.
With this memoir we have the opportunity to see what can happen to survivors who try to get justice. It reminds us why so many assaults go unreported, under a system that favours attackers rather than protect their victims, and almost accepts that these acts are just an inevitable fact of life (especially on campus). Where if you're a promising jock or famous, rich white and male, you're often held at a different standard.
What does it say about our society, when people are angrier at a woman for "putting herself in that position" (BIG quotes here), rather than at the attacker for committing the crime? Where alcohol is a reason for leniency for the accused, but more of reason to blame the victim?
Where a promising career in sports is valued more than the sanctity of someone's body and dignity?
Seeing her strength while she fought through it all to come out where she is today is a message of hope, for all survivors out there.
I really recommend this memoir. It is powerful, and it is so important. There is still so much to change.
Graphic: Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, and Mass/school shootings
sarahshapiro19's review against another edition
Graphic: Sexual assault and Sexual violence
Moderate: Gun violence and Suicide
taylorjayne's review against another edition
Graphic: Sexual assault, Suicide, Mass/school shootings, and Rape
Moderate: Injury/injury detail, Sexual harassment, Sexism, and Panic attacks/disorders
linguaphile412's review against another edition
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, and Sexual violence
Moderate: Alcohol, Death, Murder, Suicide, Suicide attempt, Violence, Sexual harassment, Mass/school shootings, Gun violence, and Gaslighting
Minor: Drug use, Sexual content, Vomit, Racial slurs, Police brutality, Panic attacks/disorders, Medical trauma, Medical content, Domestic abuse, and Injury/injury detail
kelly_e's review against another edition
Author: Chanel Miller
Pub Date: September 24, 2019
T H R E E • W O R D S
Raw • Illuminating • Transformative
📖 S Y N O P S I S
Know My Name is Chanel Miller's own personal account of her time known as Emily Doe. Brock Turner was found sexually assaulting her at Stanford, and yet was sentenced to a mere six months in county jail, despite witnesses, his running away, and physical evidence. She stunned the world with a letter, and her victim impact statement was shard on Buzzfeed, where it went viral. This is her journey to reclaim her identity and name as she tells of her trauma and shame in the aftermath.
💭 T H O U G H T S
A simply revealing and stunning piece of literature! Know My Name is a portrait showcasing how Chanel is so much more than simply a sexual assault survivor. It's a story intertwining pain, healing, and resilience in an effort to reclaim her life and introduces the reader to an incredible writer. The writing is simply breathtaking and honest. I do not know Chanel personally, nor am I a survivor, but she certainly made me feel not only her story, but the stories of thousands of others as well. This is one of the most powerful memoires I have ever bared witness to, and an illustration of why we fight to tell our stories.
This book exposes a flawed judicial system, the corruption and bureaucracy of Universities and Colleges, societies tendency towards blaming the victim, and the lack of support for victims and their families. It raises so many crucial questions and reveals what the victims of sexual assault must navigate in the aftermath.
I highly recommend tandem reading along to the audio for a more immersive experience. Chanel reads the book herself and you can hear the emotion in her voice and feel her pain in every word.
This is one I will be thinking about for quite some time. It is a necessary read that will spark conversation. Chanel's words have already changed our world, and Know My Name will be a defining piece of literature of our generation.
📚 R E C O M M E N D • T O
• Every human!
• lovers of memoirs
• sexual assault survivor
🔖 F A V O U R I T E • Q U O T E S
"This is an attempt to transform the hurt inside myself, to confront a past, and find a way to live with and incorporate these memories. I want to leave them behind so I can move forward. In not naming them, I finally name myself."
"I pulled out my small red notebook. I illuminated the pages with my phone, and wrote, 'I feel like I've already won'. It was a small nod to myself; I had done the impossible, showed up. Those who watched me cry on the stand might have perceived me as fragile, but I believed it to be the quiet beginning of my strength. I did what I'd never thought I could do, had somehow been spit out on the other side, still far from the finish line, but alive."
"But I had yet to understand the system. If you pay enough money, if you say the right things, if you take enough time to weaken and dilute the truth, the sun could slowly begin to look like an egg."
"Everything I need to get through this, I already have. Everything I need to know, I already know. Everything I need to be, I already am."
"The friendly guy who helps you moved and assists senior citizens in the pool is the same guy who assaulted me. One person can be capable of both. Society often fails to wraps its head around the fact there these truths often coexist, they are not mutually exclusive. Bad qualities can hide inside a good person. That's the terrifying part."
"When a victim does go for help, she is seen as attacking the assailant. These are separate seeking aid is her primary motive, his fallout is a secondary effect. But we are taught, if you speak, something bad happens to him. You will be blamed for every job he doesn't get, every game he doesn't play. His family, friends, community, team, will unleash hell on you, are you sure you want that? We forever her to think hard about what this will mean for his life, even though her never considered what his actions would do to her."
"There have been numerous times I have not brought up my case because I do not want to upset anybody or spoil the mood. Because I want to preserve your comfort. Because I have been told that what I have to say is too dark, too upsetting, too targeting, too triggering, let's tone it down. You will find society asking you for the happy ending, saying come back when you're better, when what you have to say can make us feel good, when you have something more uplifting, affirming. This ugliness was something I never asked for, it was dropped on me, and for a long time I worried it made me ugly too. It made me into a sad, unwelcome story that nobody wanted to hear.
But when I wrote the ugly and painful parts into a statement, an incredible thing happened. The world did not plug up its ears, it opened itself to me. I do not write to trigger victims. I write to comfort them, and I've found that victims identify more with pain than platitudes."
Graphic: Sexual assault, Rape, Sexual violence, Panic attacks/disorders, Misogyny, and Sexism
Moderate: Mass/school shootings, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, and Gaslighting
Minor: Alcohol, Racism, and Suicide attempt
Graphic: Sexual assault, Sexual content, and Rape
Moderate: Suicide, Misogyny, Mass/school shootings, and Emotional abuse
charlotte123's review against another edition
Graphic: Sexual assault and Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Mass/school shootings, Medical trauma, Mental illness, Suicide, and Rape
allyyy's review against another edition
Chanel Miller's story deserves to be heard and is one of the most honest and truthful accounts of sexual assault survivors' journey in and out of the courtroom. It took me 18 days to finish because I would become depressed, shaken, angry, upset at everything she was going through. She writes in a way that makes me feel her pain; every attack and question goes straight to my core. Read this book; you'll learn so much.
Look at trigger warnings.
Graphic: Alcohol, Body shaming, Death, Gaslighting, Gun violence, Grief, Injury/injury detail, Mass/school shootings, Medical trauma, Misogyny, Murder, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Sexual harassment, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, and Suicide attempt
rebecca713's review against another edition
Graphic: Sexual assault, Rape, and Mass/school shootings
Moderate: Suicide, Sexual violence, and Vomit
Minor: Suicidal thoughts