Reviews tagging 'Gaslighting'

Stay with Me by Ayọ̀bámi Adébáyọ̀

11 reviews

kellyofcali's review against another edition

dark emotional sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

A very tough story - not for those who cannot deal with a series of crushing blows - but well written and I did feel it paints a picture of a certain place and experience. I don't know if I can say I enjoyed it, per se, given the heaviness, but I am glad I read it. I will say it is "pitched" mush differently than it reads - it's more about being in a marriage, relationships, and being a parent than about a second wife. I also found it ended a bit suddenly for me.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Suicidal thoughts, Death, Chronic illness, Gaslighting, Grief, Child death, Dysphoria, Infidelity, Pregnancy, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, Infertility, and Terminal illness

Moderate: Sexual content, Violence, Medical content, Abandonment, and Physical abuse

Minor: War

prairiek's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death

Moderate: Gaslighting, Violence, Pregnancy, Abandonment, Emotional abuse, Infertility, Injury/Injury detail, Mental illness, and Infidelity

Minor: Sexual content, Bullying, Death of parent, Chronic illness, and Death

sharifas's review against another edition

emotional sad tense

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse, Child death, Death, Gaslighting, Infertility, and Misogyny

vedpears's review against another edition

challenging emotional inspiring reflective sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

Loved this book. The story sucked me in right away and made me tear up and/or cry a few times. As a mother, there were certain plot points that struck very deeply. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Infertility, Infidelity, Gaslighting, Death, Grief, Child death, Terminal illness, Pregnancy, Dysphoria, and Chronic illness

Moderate: Toxic relationship, War, Police brutality, Death of parent, and Murder

Minor: Bullying, Gun violence, and Mass/school shootings

davidbythebay's review against another edition

challenging emotional hopeful inspiring reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Absolutely brilliant! A lovely and devastating book that looks at a marriage from the 1980s through 2008, all with the background of Nigeria and its political turmoil. 

I first heard about this back in 2017 on NPR. I bought the book right before the pandemic started in 2020. And I finally read it now in September 2022. I do not know why I waited. If the discussion on NPR and the description wasn't enough, Margaret Atwood's Twitter review ("Scorching, gripping, ultimately lovely.") Should have really pushed this book forward for me as Atwood is an all-time favorite author of mine. But somehow I kept putting this off. 

First, let me say that it did take me a minute to get into the swing of things. By that I mean that sometimes Nigerian customs and phrases are used that usually have context clues or translations around where they are, but as I am fascinated by culture and language I often was paused by. Also, and more importantly, the story does have a dual POV which is never explicitly labeled at the start of a chapter. It was easy to pick up within the first paragraph or sentence who was talking, but it did throw me off a bit at first. 

The dual timeline (east Part begins in 2008 before going back in time to the 1980s and 90s) was easy to discern. It was very much a few chapters in 2008 with the majority of the book being a linear story of Akin and Yejide's marriage. What they went through was devastating and I won't go into it much here, but know that if you are sensitive to some topics, be warned.

Those "gripes" being laid out now, the whole book from start to finish was a captivating journey that really did sing off the page. It was lyrical and completely immersive. I learned a lot about Nigerian customs and traditions, as well as some history. This story, though, could really have been set anywhere at anytime. It is a universal story of marriage. The setting and timeperiod, however, added a whole other layer to the work and really was absolutely beautiful. Gorgeous prose sang off the page and left haunting images. 

The ending felt completely right and full. Though Part 4 is short, the book has led to this moment and you can feel it. There is a hope and a future that is shadowy and unseen, but there is a great feeling at the end that left me feeling elated by the book. 

Do not hesitate like I did... read this now! I see the author has a new novel coming out early next year. My plan is to not wait on that as I did this one. A new classic to be sure and a brilliant debut novel. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Pregnancy

Moderate: Alcohol, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Mental illness, Violence, Blood, Death, Abandonment, Child death, Chronic illness, Grief, Medical content, and Murder

disquiet's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Pregnancy, Gaslighting, Infidelity, and Infertility

Moderate: Sexual content and Medical content

Minor: Death of parent

cantfindmybookmark's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Mental illness, Infidelity, Chronic illness, Infertility, Grief, and Gaslighting

maithaalfalasi's review against another edition

dark emotional tense

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Gaslighting, Medical trauma, Misogyny, Infertility, Infidelity, and Toxic relationship

bandysbooks's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

This book went in way different directions than I was expecting. It is a very dark story and unbearably sad. I found myself viscerally frustrated at several points while reading. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Abandonment, Child death, Death, Gaslighting, Grief, Medical content, Miscarriage, Mental illness, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Infertility, Infidelity, and Pregnancy

editoryalizing's review

dark emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

The way the story continues to build on itself is immaculate. The first and second part of the book are absolutely heartbreaking, yet I could not put it down. As things begin to reveal themselves every moment is layered with significance.

Full review at Instagram.com/editoryalizing

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death and Gaslighting