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kaydanielsromance's review
4.0
A new edgy, angsty, and at times very dark, new adult romance by Siobhan Davis and S.B. Alexander. This is a hard look at what's currently happening all over the this country, addition and drug use. Holding On To Forever is not an easy read, but a look at both sides of drug life. Please mind, I'm not condoning either, but the authors did an excellent job of writing the reasons why someone would jump into the lifestyle.
Initially when I read the blurb I was on the fence about whether I wanted to read this particular book. I typically don't have an issue about reading much and obviously if I don't enjoy a genre I don't read it because at the end of the day reading is all about enjoyment and it invokes very real feelings while we do it. I've had family affected by drug use and reliving it is never easy.
I will admit the debate over reading this title was hard. What finally drew me in was Adam's story. I wanted to know what would drive someone to sell drugs. Adam Miller had it all. A full scholarship, football QB, NFL dreams in his sights. Why would a guy chance everything to sell drugs? This is the story I had to read. Adam was the storyline that kept pulling me through the story. That was entirely personal due to my own family past, but for that alone his story was heartfelt and intriguing.
Holding On To Forever is sometimes troubling to read. It's graphic and the authors don't hold back as to what drugs can do to you, or what dangers await when you commit to selling them. This is not a flowery, romantic look at this life. It's a story of what drives two people together even under the toughest situations.
Initially when I read the blurb I was on the fence about whether I wanted to read this particular book. I typically don't have an issue about reading much and obviously if I don't enjoy a genre I don't read it because at the end of the day reading is all about enjoyment and it invokes very real feelings while we do it. I've had family affected by drug use and reliving it is never easy.
I will admit the debate over reading this title was hard. What finally drew me in was Adam's story. I wanted to know what would drive someone to sell drugs. Adam Miller had it all. A full scholarship, football QB, NFL dreams in his sights. Why would a guy chance everything to sell drugs? This is the story I had to read. Adam was the storyline that kept pulling me through the story. That was entirely personal due to my own family past, but for that alone his story was heartfelt and intriguing.
Holding On To Forever is sometimes troubling to read. It's graphic and the authors don't hold back as to what drugs can do to you, or what dangers await when you commit to selling them. This is not a flowery, romantic look at this life. It's a story of what drives two people together even under the toughest situations.
nicki_theoverflowingbookcase's review against another edition
5.0
This book had me on the edge of my seat. The gut wrenching storyline of past abuse and addiction was so honestly portrayed the reader feels like they are walking in the character's footsteps. Add in the lovable but so misunderstood Emily and the Superman Adam and you will not be able to put this book down. I wish I could give it more than 5 stars - this is a must read!!
jennyluvlitbooks's review against another edition
4.0
Holding on to Forever is a stand alone, new adult romance from this writing duo. I have read a lot of Ms. Davis' work and loved it while I'm a complete newbie to Ms. Alexander. However, these two didn't pull any punches and went straight for my gut with this heart wrenchingly, angsty romance.
As of writing this review, I'm still mulling over my feelings and thoughts about this book. It's certainly not all roses and rainbows, because this book talks about deep seated trauma that Emily was going through that made her the broken, addicted, lost woman when she met Adam. It wasn't easy on both of them to get out from this way of life, especially on Emily's side as she uses to escape from the pain of her past and present predicament. On Adam, he was out of option even when he has a lot to lose; his scholarship and NFL, possibly his family if he get caught.
The story was gritty, raw, with loads of drama and angsty AF. I felt the hatred against Emily's mom and her lover that I wanted to protect Em from them. I loved that the authors never shied away from telling the ugly side of using and its effects to their behavior, even towards their loved ones. I loved Adam's unwavering love and support all throughout Emily's journey. Em is one lucky hell of a girl. I don't think I've envied a book character so much, LOL.
There are some scenes that may be triggering to some so you might be aware of that. The story was wrapped up as realistic as it could be, and I loved it more because of that. Sam is the greatest friend a guy could have. His loyalty to Adam surpasses brotherhood. I may have developed a crush on him. Although, I was kind of wondering what happened to Em's friends, Zach and Scar. Overall, this was an emotional ride, flowing with life lessons and making the right choices.
As of writing this review, I'm still mulling over my feelings and thoughts about this book. It's certainly not all roses and rainbows, because this book talks about deep seated trauma that Emily was going through that made her the broken, addicted, lost woman when she met Adam. It wasn't easy on both of them to get out from this way of life, especially on Emily's side as she uses to escape from the pain of her past and present predicament. On Adam, he was out of option even when he has a lot to lose; his scholarship and NFL, possibly his family if he get caught.
The story was gritty, raw, with loads of drama and angsty AF. I felt the hatred against Emily's mom and her lover that I wanted to protect Em from them. I loved that the authors never shied away from telling the ugly side of using and its effects to their behavior, even towards their loved ones. I loved Adam's unwavering love and support all throughout Emily's journey. Em is one lucky hell of a girl. I don't think I've envied a book character so much, LOL.
There are some scenes that may be triggering to some so you might be aware of that. The story was wrapped up as realistic as it could be, and I loved it more because of that. Sam is the greatest friend a guy could have. His loyalty to Adam surpasses brotherhood. I may have developed a crush on him. Although, I was kind of wondering what happened to Em's friends, Zach and Scar. Overall, this was an emotional ride, flowing with life lessons and making the right choices.
kellyyoungbl's review against another edition
3.0
4 stars
Typically I love Siobhan Davis books, but not this one. I’m not sure I’ve ever disliked a character more than Emily. She was weak, whiny, and selfish. Adam wasn’t great either. Their dialogue was so incredibly cheesy and I was constantly rolling my eyes. Perhaps it was the co-author who’s writing I’m not a fan? Not sure. The overall premise of this book was really good and interesting, just not the execution.
Typically I love Siobhan Davis books, but not this one. I’m not sure I’ve ever disliked a character more than Emily. She was weak, whiny, and selfish. Adam wasn’t great either. Their dialogue was so incredibly cheesy and I was constantly rolling my eyes. Perhaps it was the co-author who’s writing I’m not a fan? Not sure. The overall premise of this book was really good and interesting, just not the execution.
thebusybookmom's review
5.0
This book is everything love is about: Crazy and Messy!
Adam and Emily are two lonely people just trying to make it through this crappy things called life. Their meeting is by chance, but their love is destined by fate!
This book deals with real life issues, and every day struggles. It definitely tugs at the heart strings, and made me see things from a different perspective. Their battle to get from where the book starts to where is ends had me rooting for them every step of the way.
This is the first book I have read where S.B. Alexander has been an author. The co-writing between Siobhan and S.B. was flawless and so fluid. Together they told an amazing story dealing with addiction, and financial issues that many in this world can relate too. I truly felt like I was witnessing a real life story of two people just trying to make it work, and I was given the insiders view to all of their thoughts and feelings. As a reader we are able to see exactly where these two are coming from, and why they make their choices. This book will definitely get a second read from me to catch everything I missed. Hopefully S.B. and Siobhan work together again as they definitely have some great author chemistry!
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book!
Adam and Emily are two lonely people just trying to make it through this crappy things called life. Their meeting is by chance, but their love is destined by fate!
This book deals with real life issues, and every day struggles. It definitely tugs at the heart strings, and made me see things from a different perspective. Their battle to get from where the book starts to where is ends had me rooting for them every step of the way.
This is the first book I have read where S.B. Alexander has been an author. The co-writing between Siobhan and S.B. was flawless and so fluid. Together they told an amazing story dealing with addiction, and financial issues that many in this world can relate too. I truly felt like I was witnessing a real life story of two people just trying to make it work, and I was given the insiders view to all of their thoughts and feelings. As a reader we are able to see exactly where these two are coming from, and why they make their choices. This book will definitely get a second read from me to catch everything I missed. Hopefully S.B. and Siobhan work together again as they definitely have some great author chemistry!
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book!
thebookishattitude's review against another edition
5.0
Advanced Reader Copy Review
S.B Alexander is a new to me author, Siobhan Davis is not. I absolutely love her work, for that reason alone I wanted to give this a shot.
I gotta tell ya, I read it in one sitting. I couldn't help myself.
Emily is a drug addict. And most drug addicts, are addicts for a reason. Something happened to them in their past, they will either know what that "thing" was or they wont. Emily knows. And those reasons are absolutely heart breaking.
Adam isn't out to be a dealer for himself, he see's the devastation he's leaving behind. But, to make sure his sister is able to stay healthy and his mumma can pay the bills, then dealing is the quickest way to make that happen.
This book delves into some heavy topics, that probably come with trigger warnings. *rape, drug abuse, neglect, and maybe a few others* Now as I haven't read S.B I can't be sure what her style is, but this story does stay true to Siobhan's style of heartbreak.
If you have read one but not the other, like me, you can still enjoy this story and if you've read and enjoyed both authors I recommend you do read this.
As someone who is studying to work in the mental health and alcohol and other drugs industry as a councillor, I'm appreciative on how both authors have taken the time, care and consideration to shape their fictional characters to depict something that is very real for so many people.
S.B Alexander is a new to me author, Siobhan Davis is not. I absolutely love her work, for that reason alone I wanted to give this a shot.
I gotta tell ya, I read it in one sitting. I couldn't help myself.
Emily is a drug addict. And most drug addicts, are addicts for a reason. Something happened to them in their past, they will either know what that "thing" was or they wont. Emily knows. And those reasons are absolutely heart breaking.
Adam isn't out to be a dealer for himself, he see's the devastation he's leaving behind. But, to make sure his sister is able to stay healthy and his mumma can pay the bills, then dealing is the quickest way to make that happen.
This book delves into some heavy topics, that probably come with trigger warnings. *rape, drug abuse, neglect, and maybe a few others* Now as I haven't read S.B I can't be sure what her style is, but this story does stay true to Siobhan's style of heartbreak.
If you have read one but not the other, like me, you can still enjoy this story and if you've read and enjoyed both authors I recommend you do read this.
As someone who is studying to work in the mental health and alcohol and other drugs industry as a councillor, I'm appreciative on how both authors have taken the time, care and consideration to shape their fictional characters to depict something that is very real for so many people.
bookish_kayy's review
5.0
Adam Miller is CU’s QB. He’s also a drug dealer. For him, meeting Emily struck him like a bolt of lightning, even when he didn’t recognize what was happening.
Emily has struggled with drug addiction. When she meets Adam, she’s cautious.
I loved the fact that they didn’t dive straight into a romance. They simmered as friends for a little while before turning up the heat.
I loved this book. Both of their struggles are heartbreaking, but also so very REAL. Each one was led down their path because of circumstances and choice that they made, mostly out of some hardship. Watching them stumble their paths was just so honest, so refreshing, and so enlightening. I know there’s plenty of that out in the ‘real world’ so to see the comparisons is eye opening.
I definitely enjoyed this book, which is not surprising, as Davis has been one of my one click authors for awhile, but this was also a brilliant introduction to Alexander.
Emily has struggled with drug addiction. When she meets Adam, she’s cautious.
I loved the fact that they didn’t dive straight into a romance. They simmered as friends for a little while before turning up the heat.
I loved this book. Both of their struggles are heartbreaking, but also so very REAL. Each one was led down their path because of circumstances and choice that they made, mostly out of some hardship. Watching them stumble their paths was just so honest, so refreshing, and so enlightening. I know there’s plenty of that out in the ‘real world’ so to see the comparisons is eye opening.
I definitely enjoyed this book, which is not surprising, as Davis has been one of my one click authors for awhile, but this was also a brilliant introduction to Alexander.
profromance's review against another edition
4.0
Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I’ve recently been reading Siobhan Davis’s bully romance series, Rydeville High. Every book is a twisted tale of romance, greed, and star-crossed lovers set in high school. It’s oftentimes difficult to read because everything bad seems rained down upon the head of the main heroine. Davis’s newest book, Holding On to Forever, has much the same feel. Co-written with S. B. Alexander, this is an emotionally gripping romance of two college-aged students, Adam and Emily. Adam meets Emily one night when he sells her friend, Zach, drugs, namely Molly. See, Adam, the Cypress University quarterback, must sell drugs to make enough fast money to care for his mother and sister who has a debilitating disease. To be fair, he doesn’t want to sell drugs, but it allows him to make quite a bit of money quickly. On meeting Emily for the first time, there is an instant connection.
Emily is Adam’s head coach’s daughter, unbeknownst to him at their first meeting. Her past holds a terrible secret that causes her to use drugs to anesthetize herself against the pain of it. An unloving, opportunistic mother, an absentee father, and her secret conspire to derail her life through her use of drugs. Until she meets Adam. Even though Adam realizes quickly that he is inadvertently providing the drugs for Emily, he works to help save her from herself while buoying her up to save herself. In the end, he wants to love her enough for her to stop using it. Will Adam save her, will he save himself and his family, or will they break, unable to move beyond life’s trials? Those are the questions of Davis and Alexander’s book. And they are important ones.
Okay, I have to admit that I was intrigued by this story from the reading of its blurb. While I don’t profess to be a prolific romance reader, I have read quite a few romances in the past couple of years to warrant having a good understanding of typical romance stories. And this one, as far as I can tell, is different. A drug user falling in love with her dealer? Obviously, from my summary, it is much more nuanced than that. However, it is different, and you can’t help but be interested in the story.
Let me also say that there is MUCH more to this book than this basic storyline. Through this story, Davis and Alexander are pointing to issues of poverty, abuse in all its forms, date rape, drug abuse, and broken families. This book is loaded with story. Each character seems to represent a social issue. In my opinion, it’s the interesting, but also problematic part of this book. I think that there were so many different parts to the story that it sometimes undermines other aspects of the story. I hate to go into any detail because I don’t want to give away the book’s secrets. Yet, I can’t help but suggest that some of the storylines could have been revised out. Emily and Adam’s story alone is enough for this book.
In terms of its characters, Adam is a saint by most measures. That’s actually difficult to write given his role in the story. But it’s clear from the start that he feels responsible for providing for his family, and he will do anything to fulfill that role. With that, there are actions he takes in the book that are morally ambiguous. Necessary for survival, but worrisome. That he knows they are morally problematic AND compromise Emily’s sobriety makes him the saint. He can be headstrong which is his downfall. He fails to include his roommate/best friend in his troubles, causing problems for himself. In trying to fix his family’s problem on his own, his actions seem short-sighted in the context of his future. Yet, he loves Emily deeply. With the exception of one moment in the story of their relationship, he is protective and adores her. The love she has failed to receive from her home life comes from him, and it becomes some of the impetus for her eventual healing. Adam is strong, insightful, and a foundation for Emily to build her hopes on.
Now, Emily is a difficult one to assess. Her character alone represents many of the social issues of the story. Encompassed in her is the problem, and, quite frankly, the solution. It, however, takes her most of the story to get there. Like any addict, she self-sabotages throughout much of the book. I think it’s important to read this type of heroine, though. Most characters in modern romance become their own biggest issue. And Davis and Alexander seem to be pointing to this trait of the genre. It really doesn’t matter that she’s an addict. She could be an assistant to a billionaire or the billionaire herself and still make poor choices in a romantic relationship. What Davis and Alexander have done, though, is point us to a social ill: addiction. They could have created a heroine who self-sabotages in more traditional romance genre ways, but they didn’t. They took the opportunity in this book to illustrate for us the difficulties of addiction and its impact on families. This is the power of this book. It is more than a romance; Holding On to Forever is a story of healing and becoming who you are meant to be.
This book can be difficult to read. It handles drug addiction, abuse, poverty, and broken families in some ugly ways. However, the ending has a huge payoff. You feel as though you’ve lived a long life when you finish this book, but it’s so fulfilling because the growth of the characters is tremendous. Holding On to Forever is a book that all of us should read, as it challenges what it means to find and fall in love in the midst of trauma.
I’ve recently been reading Siobhan Davis’s bully romance series, Rydeville High. Every book is a twisted tale of romance, greed, and star-crossed lovers set in high school. It’s oftentimes difficult to read because everything bad seems rained down upon the head of the main heroine. Davis’s newest book, Holding On to Forever, has much the same feel. Co-written with S. B. Alexander, this is an emotionally gripping romance of two college-aged students, Adam and Emily. Adam meets Emily one night when he sells her friend, Zach, drugs, namely Molly. See, Adam, the Cypress University quarterback, must sell drugs to make enough fast money to care for his mother and sister who has a debilitating disease. To be fair, he doesn’t want to sell drugs, but it allows him to make quite a bit of money quickly. On meeting Emily for the first time, there is an instant connection.
Emily is Adam’s head coach’s daughter, unbeknownst to him at their first meeting. Her past holds a terrible secret that causes her to use drugs to anesthetize herself against the pain of it. An unloving, opportunistic mother, an absentee father, and her secret conspire to derail her life through her use of drugs. Until she meets Adam. Even though Adam realizes quickly that he is inadvertently providing the drugs for Emily, he works to help save her from herself while buoying her up to save herself. In the end, he wants to love her enough for her to stop using it. Will Adam save her, will he save himself and his family, or will they break, unable to move beyond life’s trials? Those are the questions of Davis and Alexander’s book. And they are important ones.
Okay, I have to admit that I was intrigued by this story from the reading of its blurb. While I don’t profess to be a prolific romance reader, I have read quite a few romances in the past couple of years to warrant having a good understanding of typical romance stories. And this one, as far as I can tell, is different. A drug user falling in love with her dealer? Obviously, from my summary, it is much more nuanced than that. However, it is different, and you can’t help but be interested in the story.
Let me also say that there is MUCH more to this book than this basic storyline. Through this story, Davis and Alexander are pointing to issues of poverty, abuse in all its forms, date rape, drug abuse, and broken families. This book is loaded with story. Each character seems to represent a social issue. In my opinion, it’s the interesting, but also problematic part of this book. I think that there were so many different parts to the story that it sometimes undermines other aspects of the story. I hate to go into any detail because I don’t want to give away the book’s secrets. Yet, I can’t help but suggest that some of the storylines could have been revised out. Emily and Adam’s story alone is enough for this book.
In terms of its characters, Adam is a saint by most measures. That’s actually difficult to write given his role in the story. But it’s clear from the start that he feels responsible for providing for his family, and he will do anything to fulfill that role. With that, there are actions he takes in the book that are morally ambiguous. Necessary for survival, but worrisome. That he knows they are morally problematic AND compromise Emily’s sobriety makes him the saint. He can be headstrong which is his downfall. He fails to include his roommate/best friend in his troubles, causing problems for himself. In trying to fix his family’s problem on his own, his actions seem short-sighted in the context of his future. Yet, he loves Emily deeply. With the exception of one moment in the story of their relationship, he is protective and adores her. The love she has failed to receive from her home life comes from him, and it becomes some of the impetus for her eventual healing. Adam is strong, insightful, and a foundation for Emily to build her hopes on.
Now, Emily is a difficult one to assess. Her character alone represents many of the social issues of the story. Encompassed in her is the problem, and, quite frankly, the solution. It, however, takes her most of the story to get there. Like any addict, she self-sabotages throughout much of the book. I think it’s important to read this type of heroine, though. Most characters in modern romance become their own biggest issue. And Davis and Alexander seem to be pointing to this trait of the genre. It really doesn’t matter that she’s an addict. She could be an assistant to a billionaire or the billionaire herself and still make poor choices in a romantic relationship. What Davis and Alexander have done, though, is point us to a social ill: addiction. They could have created a heroine who self-sabotages in more traditional romance genre ways, but they didn’t. They took the opportunity in this book to illustrate for us the difficulties of addiction and its impact on families. This is the power of this book. It is more than a romance; Holding On to Forever is a story of healing and becoming who you are meant to be.
This book can be difficult to read. It handles drug addiction, abuse, poverty, and broken families in some ugly ways. However, the ending has a huge payoff. You feel as though you’ve lived a long life when you finish this book, but it’s so fulfilling because the growth of the characters is tremendous. Holding On to Forever is a book that all of us should read, as it challenges what it means to find and fall in love in the midst of trauma.
kfriend's review against another edition
5.0
Even though I’m a long time fan of Siobhan Davis, I’d been avoiding reading this book. As a child of an addict myself, I find it a difficult topic for writers to effectively convey- either the story is too gritty, too real, too hopeless, or it isn’t enough of those things. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to root for an addict as a heroine- particularly one that falls into the privileged/rich kid stereotype. But this emotional, unflinching story of tragedy and addiction worked for me- and the more I think about it, the more connected to it I feel.
Our leading man, Adam, is a college athlete, on the pathway to the NFL. He’s got it all together, but his younger sister is sick and his mother is struggling to make ends meet- so he turns back to what he never thought he’d return to- drug dealing. His path first crosses our heroine Emily in a hospital- as she’s recovering from her latest bender, and later they find their lives intertwined as Adam ends up becoming Emily’s drug dealer. Their chemistry is instance- Adam recognizes a lost soul in Emily, and he wants to shield her from herself. Emily is in a lot of trouble in a number of ways- but she finds the first real, meaningful and reciprocated connection she’s ever had in Adam.
I love how the authors challenge character archetypes here, it makes for some really interesting character development and for an intense emotional connection to each of them. Adam plays football, but he’s not the “jock,” and he may very well be one of the most charming, authentic, and likable heroes I’ve read to date. He’s committed to those he loves, he’s kind and thoughtful, and he’s more conservative sexually and more emotionally open than Emily. He’s the responsible one- the caregiver and altruistic nurturer. SD/SA give him a refreshing self-awareness- he’s both unapologetic about having to do what he does to help his sister while also keenly feeling the weight of enabling the destruction of others- a guilt that is magnified when he becomes the gateway to Emily’s drug abuse. Oh, Emily- she’s such a heartbreaking, a train wreck you can’t turn away from. Her addiction plays a huge role in her identity, so much so that she’s not even sure she knows who she is when she’s not under the influence. She can’t function without a fix, and she’s spirarling, self-destructing pill by pill. She’s just so incredibly lost- and devastatingly alone- surrounded by friends who enable her and encourage her to engage in activities she regrets and a distant family. To be honest, it was hard to love Emily- not only because of my personal history but because her addiction masks who she really is for much of the book. She’s not the kind of heroine you want to be, or even be friends with, but that’s the point- we aren’t meant to romanticize her, we’re meant to understand her- to walk in shoes, and in that, this book truly shines.
At first I had a hard time getting into the story- both because I was apprehensive and because I was waiting for the love story to pick up, and then I realized this really isn’t about the love story. Don’t worry- there is one, and it is charming, healing, deeply emotional, and as steamy as you’d expect from SD. But more so, I found this story to be about one of the greatest challenges in the human experience- COPING. This is a story about two people who have been victimized- literally and metaphorically. Two people trying to cope with the adversity of their lives. Two people who on the surface have the entire world at their fingertips, but who struggle, everyday, to live the life they want. Two people who are trying to slay their own personal demons- and who just so happen to find real and authentic connection, a connection that bolsters them for the battles they were already waging individually.
Their story is not easy- we have lots triggering topics (with some shocking situations- this is SD!), and some truly heartbreaking moments- one of which was so devastating that I feel it might leave a permanent scar on my heart. Is this a perfect depiction of the heartbreaking complexities of the impact of addiction and overcoming it? No, no at all- this is still fiction, and it is still a romance. But, the spirit of what is here is what matters. Emily and Adam’s story is haunting, at times uncomfortable, but it is beautifully hopeful at its core. A testament to the power of healing and connection, that we can find new and healthier ways to cope even when we are in the darkest points of despair. You can hit rock bottom and still learn to thrive, you can hit rock bottom and still be worthy of love and forgiveness, you can hit rock bottom and still be strong.
Our leading man, Adam, is a college athlete, on the pathway to the NFL. He’s got it all together, but his younger sister is sick and his mother is struggling to make ends meet- so he turns back to what he never thought he’d return to- drug dealing. His path first crosses our heroine Emily in a hospital- as she’s recovering from her latest bender, and later they find their lives intertwined as Adam ends up becoming Emily’s drug dealer. Their chemistry is instance- Adam recognizes a lost soul in Emily, and he wants to shield her from herself. Emily is in a lot of trouble in a number of ways- but she finds the first real, meaningful and reciprocated connection she’s ever had in Adam.
I love how the authors challenge character archetypes here, it makes for some really interesting character development and for an intense emotional connection to each of them. Adam plays football, but he’s not the “jock,” and he may very well be one of the most charming, authentic, and likable heroes I’ve read to date. He’s committed to those he loves, he’s kind and thoughtful, and he’s more conservative sexually and more emotionally open than Emily. He’s the responsible one- the caregiver and altruistic nurturer. SD/SA give him a refreshing self-awareness- he’s both unapologetic about having to do what he does to help his sister while also keenly feeling the weight of enabling the destruction of others- a guilt that is magnified when he becomes the gateway to Emily’s drug abuse. Oh, Emily- she’s such a heartbreaking, a train wreck you can’t turn away from. Her addiction plays a huge role in her identity, so much so that she’s not even sure she knows who she is when she’s not under the influence. She can’t function without a fix, and she’s spirarling, self-destructing pill by pill. She’s just so incredibly lost- and devastatingly alone- surrounded by friends who enable her and encourage her to engage in activities she regrets and a distant family. To be honest, it was hard to love Emily- not only because of my personal history but because her addiction masks who she really is for much of the book. She’s not the kind of heroine you want to be, or even be friends with, but that’s the point- we aren’t meant to romanticize her, we’re meant to understand her- to walk in shoes, and in that, this book truly shines.
At first I had a hard time getting into the story- both because I was apprehensive and because I was waiting for the love story to pick up, and then I realized this really isn’t about the love story. Don’t worry- there is one, and it is charming, healing, deeply emotional, and as steamy as you’d expect from SD. But more so, I found this story to be about one of the greatest challenges in the human experience- COPING. This is a story about two people who have been victimized- literally and metaphorically. Two people trying to cope with the adversity of their lives. Two people who on the surface have the entire world at their fingertips, but who struggle, everyday, to live the life they want. Two people who are trying to slay their own personal demons- and who just so happen to find real and authentic connection, a connection that bolsters them for the battles they were already waging individually.
Their story is not easy- we have lots triggering topics (with some shocking situations- this is SD!), and some truly heartbreaking moments- one of which was so devastating that I feel it might leave a permanent scar on my heart. Is this a perfect depiction of the heartbreaking complexities of the impact of addiction and overcoming it? No, no at all- this is still fiction, and it is still a romance. But, the spirit of what is here is what matters. Emily and Adam’s story is haunting, at times uncomfortable, but it is beautifully hopeful at its core. A testament to the power of healing and connection, that we can find new and healthier ways to cope even when we are in the darkest points of despair. You can hit rock bottom and still learn to thrive, you can hit rock bottom and still be worthy of love and forgiveness, you can hit rock bottom and still be strong.
hannas_heas47's review against another edition
3.0
Thanks to the author for a ARC to read and give my honest opinion.
This was hard to get into for me only because I couldnt at first see these two getting together. Adams a footballer, my body is my temple, but I sell drugs because my mom with no job /sister with medical condition need money. Emily is from a wealthy family but has a drug problem because of an unknown issue that later comes out. I felt the middle of the book grow stronger then the finale just lose momentum. Really crazy ride right?
What did I like? When Emily was being good, she was good with Adam but when Emily was on molly she was horrible. I thought the Jekyll and Hyde character kind of draining and the drug use over the top. It just didn’t lead to a situation that I would warrant reading.
This was hard to get into for me only because I couldnt at first see these two getting together. Adams a footballer, my body is my temple, but I sell drugs because my mom with no job /sister with medical condition need money. Emily is from a wealthy family but has a drug problem because of an unknown issue that later comes out. I felt the middle of the book grow stronger then the finale just lose momentum. Really crazy ride right?
What did I like? When Emily was being good, she was good with Adam but when Emily was on molly she was horrible. I thought the Jekyll and Hyde character kind of draining and the drug use over the top. It just didn’t lead to a situation that I would warrant reading.