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3.74 AVERAGE
3.74 AVERAGE
reflective
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
Un roman sur le sujet de la vieillesse, qui m'a parfois déprimée, mais que j'ai trouvé parfois poétique, et parfois avec des descriptions un peu trop précises que je n'aurais pas voulu lire haha. L'autrice ne nous épargne rien. Mais je suis contente de l'avoir lu, il va sans doute me rester en tête un moment.
This Japanese novel was originally published in 1972, but many aspects felt very much from today. The novel follows Akiko a middle-aged wife and mother whose father-in-law becomes senile and his care falls to Akiko. So many themes here--taking care of the elderly, quality of life and indignities in aging, the sandwich generation, how care responsibility often falls on women, and the bewilderment of the system of elder care. I would be reading along in this novel and would learn a bit about Japanese culture in he 20th century only to then be struck by Akiko's story and how familiar it felt to the experience here in the US in the 21st century.
This wasn't exactly a feel-good novel. In fact, it dredged up a whole lot of feelings and made want to give my brother a hug for all he does for our mother in Southern California every day. And this book also made me re-experience that year of bewilderment and pain our family had when Mom fell ill and we had to make the decision to put her in a senior home. A piece of advice--get your parent a good geriatric attorney to help you sort everything out. I'll be visiting her here in just a few weeks. For years, I called my Mom every single day but she is at that point now where she can't call me anymore, and if I talk to her on the phone she won't stay on for long. This summer I visited I had the opportunity to sit with her for a couple of hours, and it was the first time in a long time that we seemed to have a real conversation like we did for so many years. I miss my Mom. And I take a little comfort from some scenes with Akiko that sometimes you just need to hold on to these small moments--one where she finds her father-in-law looking at a beautiful magnolia blossom or the small joy he gets from watching a bird they buy him.
This wasn't exactly a feel-good novel. In fact, it dredged up a whole lot of feelings and made want to give my brother a hug for all he does for our mother in Southern California every day. And this book also made me re-experience that year of bewilderment and pain our family had when Mom fell ill and we had to make the decision to put her in a senior home. A piece of advice--get your parent a good geriatric attorney to help you sort everything out. I'll be visiting her here in just a few weeks. For years, I called my Mom every single day but she is at that point now where she can't call me anymore, and if I talk to her on the phone she won't stay on for long. This summer I visited I had the opportunity to sit with her for a couple of hours, and it was the first time in a long time that we seemed to have a real conversation like we did for so many years. I miss my Mom. And I take a little comfort from some scenes with Akiko that sometimes you just need to hold on to these small moments--one where she finds her father-in-law looking at a beautiful magnolia blossom or the small joy he gets from watching a bird they buy him.
An interesting glimpse into both the world of the traditional Japanese wife (because Akiko, the main character, does not live up to the standard) and the problem of aging in a society that is defined almost entirely by the work done by the male head of household. Akiko's mother-in-law drops dead unexpectedly, leaving her to care for her senile father-in-law while still working a full-time job and waiting on her husband and teenage son hand and foot. While the husband and son are described as being forced to contribute much more to the running of the household than is common (by occasionally getting their own food or staying at home with Grandpa while she does the grocery shopping), the burden falls largely on her and she struggles to balance her duties as a daughter-in-law with being a person in her own right. I kind of felt like the part of the thread about Akiko just vanished at some point and it became all about the care of the father-in-law and the concerns of a rapidly aging population with health problems that the infrastructure of the country was not prepared to cope with instead.
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
Growing old should not be someone else's problem.
This line seems to summarize the mood of this book pretty well. [b:The Twilight Years|748936|The Twilight Years|Sawako Ariyoshi|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1378740969s/748936.jpg|735076] addresses several different questions of life, including that of the quality of life and how much effort should be given to keep someone alive. Ariyoshi also digs into the gender roles and the expectations on young women--all with the mid-century, post-war Japan as the backdrop.
This book is truly a disturbing and unsettling look into the end of life and what awaits each of us. As a young woman in my mid-twenties, death is something I don't want to bother myself with too much, and neither did the protagonist, Akiko. However, she frequently comes to the realization that "we, too, will grow old one day." With that in consideration, it is important to treat our elderly as we hope to be treated by our descendants. Although Akiko fights this truth and desperately tries to find a new solution so that she may continue to live the life she has grown accustomed to, she learns to move with life and make the sacrifices necessary to make her father-in-law live the end of his life comfortably and happily.
I wouldn't say that I loved this book, but I'm glad I read it. I always love learning as much as I can about my Japanese heritage and the changes that they went through in the 20th century, plus the other issues addressed here were both thought-provoking and uncomfortable--qualities in a book that are so important.
I think the biggest takeaway I had was the hopelessness that those who do not know Jesus have, especially in regards to death. I don't believe that death and the afterlife should be the reason one believes in God, but it reminded me of the importance of hope and how much it changes my own self-preservation impulses so that I am not so desperate for perfection and painlessness. I am also not afraid of becoming burdensome or losing myself because my pride is not something to hold on to with white knuckles.
All in all, it's a decent book that forces you to think about the thoughts you try to avoid.
This line seems to summarize the mood of this book pretty well. [b:The Twilight Years|748936|The Twilight Years|Sawako Ariyoshi|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1378740969s/748936.jpg|735076] addresses several different questions of life, including that of the quality of life and how much effort should be given to keep someone alive. Ariyoshi also digs into the gender roles and the expectations on young women--all with the mid-century, post-war Japan as the backdrop.
This book is truly a disturbing and unsettling look into the end of life and what awaits each of us. As a young woman in my mid-twenties, death is something I don't want to bother myself with too much, and neither did the protagonist, Akiko. However, she frequently comes to the realization that "we, too, will grow old one day." With that in consideration, it is important to treat our elderly as we hope to be treated by our descendants. Although Akiko fights this truth and desperately tries to find a new solution so that she may continue to live the life she has grown accustomed to, she learns to move with life and make the sacrifices necessary to make her father-in-law live the end of his life comfortably and happily.
I wouldn't say that I loved this book, but I'm glad I read it. I always love learning as much as I can about my Japanese heritage and the changes that they went through in the 20th century, plus the other issues addressed here were both thought-provoking and uncomfortable--qualities in a book that are so important.
I think the biggest takeaway I had was the hopelessness that those who do not know Jesus have, especially in regards to death. I don't believe that death and the afterlife should be the reason one believes in God, but it reminded me of the importance of hope and how much it changes my own self-preservation impulses so that I am not so desperate for perfection and painlessness. I am also not afraid of becoming burdensome or losing myself because my pride is not something to hold on to with white knuckles.
All in all, it's a decent book that forces you to think about the thoughts you try to avoid.
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
In "Twilight Years", Sawako Ariyoshi mesmerizes with detail. The reader is forced to confront the mundane, the bizarre, and the often appalling aspects of growing old, and empathizes with the family who must care for "Grandfather" as his physical and mental condition continue to deteriorate. We sympathize especially with the wife, Akiko, who seems close to losing her own sanity at several points, realizing her frustration and despair as she comes to understand that the societal system in place is not equipped to deal with the steadily rising number of elderly who cannot live independently. If the father-in-law who spent decades tormenting her mercilessly is to survive, it must be through her own efforts. The crux of the novel is her journey to redemption through sacrifice, and until the final pages, the reader wonders which whether Akiko and her family, whose daily life had been so neatly mapped out, will themselves survive the chaos that descends when caring for Grandfather becomes their communal responsibility.
To a non-Japanese reader, this book may seem hopelessly outdated and far-fetched at times, but to those who have lived in a Japanese extended family for any amount of time, the details ring true. Ariyoshi-san's novel was first published in 1972, but with the steadily declining birthrate in recent years, the issues it raises bear re-examining. Will society be able to shoulder the burden of yet more and more "Grandfathers", especially those without family or reliable networks?
Approach this book cautiously, and be prepared to face the inevitability of your own death. Yet if the subject matter is dark, Akiko's struggle is uplifting; readers who persevere till the end will be uplifted as well. An excellent and thought-provoking read.
To a non-Japanese reader, this book may seem hopelessly outdated and far-fetched at times, but to those who have lived in a Japanese extended family for any amount of time, the details ring true. Ariyoshi-san's novel was first published in 1972, but with the steadily declining birthrate in recent years, the issues it raises bear re-examining. Will society be able to shoulder the burden of yet more and more "Grandfathers", especially those without family or reliable networks?
Approach this book cautiously, and be prepared to face the inevitability of your own death. Yet if the subject matter is dark, Akiko's struggle is uplifting; readers who persevere till the end will be uplifted as well. An excellent and thought-provoking read.
A decent, if kinda slow-moving, novel about a woman dealing with her father-in-law's dementia; as well as her own mortality.