Reviews with content warning for Eating disorder - You Exist Too Much

This is a novel about healing. Healing from generational trauma. From abuse. From love addiction. From disordered eating. From toxic relationships. The unnamed protagonist of You Exist Too Much is a realistically complicated and messy person. Throughout this novel, she consistently makes mistakes as she tries to sort out who she is and what she wants - all while fighting deep-seated childhood trauma.

You Exist Too Much is a character-driven coming-of-age story with a whole lot of heart. The biggest strength of this book is its portrayal of the difficulties in overcoming harmful patterns. Healing oneself doesn't happen immediately. Rather, it's a slow and effortful process for our protagonist (and for many of us in real life).

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noahsingh's review against another edition

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reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Interesting but couldn't hack the sheer amount of annoying men the main character was attached/attracted to.
The main interesting aspects to me (Palestinian heritage + relationship with their mother + the instances of Islamophobia/ acism & Zionism she faces) had very little space in the book.

Also I do think her outing that woman was unforgivable and I Hate Hate Hated that that (trigger warning) literal rapist white guy at The Lodge is, if anything, forgiven/absolved by the narrative.

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sydnec's review against another edition

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emotional funny inspiring reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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bibookworm's review against another edition

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challenging emotional slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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jayisreading's review

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challenging emotional reflective medium-paced

3.0

This novel didn’t quite work for me. I think there were a couple gems, such as the way Arafat explored her unnamed protagonist’s identity and its complexities. This isn’t just a novel about a messy bisexual who made a lot of poor choices; it’s also very much a novel about a Palestinian American who is trying to make sense of her cultural identity in relation to her sexuality. This is further complicated by the protagonist’s relationship with her mother and the tensions that come with not being “enough” while also being “too much.” I can see why Arafat felt that all of these things needed to be addressed in the novel, and I can’t really imagine it without all of these moving pieces. However, I felt that the author only scratched the surface as a result of having too much she wanted to write about, resulting in a somewhat superficial, not-fully-realized exploration of the protagonist’s understanding of the world.

I think Arafat is a good writer, and while messy protagonists don’t always work for me, I was still compelled to follow the one she wrote. I just think the way she chose to organize this novel didn’t work for me.

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brotestantethic's review against another edition

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emotional funny reflective fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

The true definition of raw. Arafat achieved a stream of consciousness, across several years of plot, that will ring true with some part of the reader, no matter how small. The main character is selfish, traitorous, and destructive, and yet you root for her. Her huge personality is a major draw of this book.

This would have been five stars, but it is possible to be too raw, and this teeters the line. There is a lot going on, like in life, and it is hard to grasp what the meaning is of a particular chapter. I also found the treatment center confusing, with predictable characters and dialogue. Still I loved the unconventional structure and will be thinking about this book for a very long time.

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queergoth_reads's review against another edition

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emotional reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

I could not put this down. I picked it up when I was struggling to read anything else and I finished it in one sitting.

It wasn't exatly an easy fun read. It was incredibly emotional and it was fantastic.

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