Reviews tagging 'Gaslighting'

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

25 reviews

gabyhat's review against another edition

hopeful informative slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexual content, Homophobia, Islamophobia, and Toxic relationship

Minor: Death, Gaslighting, and Alcohol

scribblinginthemargins's review against another edition

dark reflective fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

A dark yet occassionally comic narrative about a young woman seeking treatment for the psychological impact of her mother's narcissistic abuse. Compelling, self-destructive and uncomfortably intimate.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Biphobia, Addiction, Islamophobia, Dysphoria, Toxic relationship, and Gaslighting

nithya_natalya's review against another edition

hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

This title was recommended on a number of lists of books by Palestinian authors to read in the wake of the current genocide. I picked this one up specifically because it is also queer. If you don't like characters who make messy, bad decisions, this may not be for you, but I loved it. I also enjoyed the way it was written in vignettes that were not always chronological. Past and ancestral traumas, intermingled with present pain and numbing. The MC's tendency to fall back into old patterns during moments of pain was frustrating but also deeply familiar and relatable. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic relationship

Moderate: Gaslighting, Homophobia, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Biphobia, Addiction, War, and Alcoholism

flamesocks's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Classism, Cursing, Eating disorder, Addiction, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Mental illness, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, Toxic relationship, Gaslighting, Islamophobia, and Lesbophobia

readingwithkaitlyn's review against another edition

emotional reflective fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Infidelity, Lesbophobia, Toxic relationship, Mental illness, and Child abuse

Moderate: Racism, Gaslighting, Physical abuse, Outing, Abandonment, Misogyny, Eating disorder, Sexual content, Domestic abuse, Addiction, and Grief

Minor: Pregnancy, Body shaming, Alcohol, Colonisation, Genocide, Drug abuse, Drug use, Injury/Injury detail, Death, Pedophilia, Adult/minor relationship, Sexual assault, Blood, Classism, Xenophobia, War, Religious bigotry, and Police brutality

DUI.

marissasa's review against another edition

emotional reflective tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

With a title like You Exist Too Much, I knew this book would revolve around trauma. What I didn't expect was for our main character to be so deeply toxic and messy along the way to healing. The most compelling part about this book to me was the mother-daughter dynamic and how layered it was with their Palestinian immigrant identities and the daughter's queerness. However, I found a lot of the rest of the book a bit dull and repetitive, specifically the way that each of the main character's romantic relationships was detailed. She repeated the same mistakes or fell into the same toxic habits in each relationship and it felt like the story unnecessarily hammering home a fact about the main character (that she has a love addiction) that we already knew from the start since the book is told out of chronological order. While I loved the representation of her journey with bisexuality and her struggles with her mother, overall this book didn't leave as much of a lasting impression on me as I hoped.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcohol, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Racism, Sexual content, Gaslighting, Physical abuse, Infidelity, Biphobia, Toxic relationship, Xenophobia, Cursing, Domestic abuse, and Homophobia

lady_valhella's review against another edition

emotional sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcohol, Emotional abuse, Eating disorder, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Drug abuse, Bullying, Drug use, and Homophobia

Minor: War, Body shaming, and Child abuse

karabeavis's review against another edition

adventurous informative lighthearted sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I flew through this book in a weekend. Super easy to read! I closed the last page thinking this was a story with a lot of pain — one that’s very sad because

the main character’s mother ultimately does not accept her daughter as she is, queer. The mother is terribly emotionally abusive towards her daughter throughout her life.

Perhaps this is realistic, but that aspect of the story does not improve. It offers an insight into survival as a young adult after emotional abuse and neglect from parents and intergenerational trauma: something others will probably relate to.

These are the voices and lives I want more of: queer, Palestinian-American, young, global citizens, educated. There is such an under—representation of these kinds of stories in so—called Australia. I felt privileged to get insights into the lives of people that are pretty different from my own. 

Plus it’s just a cool book. Despite heavy content in places, the book manages to be incredibly light—hearted, fun, sexy and sharp, with wry political observations about racism, whites privilege etc. 

As Professor Roxane Gay says, the book is sexy and compelling. Thank you to the author for this book. I’d definitely read another by this author. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Homophobia, Toxic relationship, War, Infidelity, Child abuse, Eating disorder, Gaslighting, Emotional abuse, Grief, and Outing

drrayeraye's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Biphobia, Adult/minor relationship, Islamophobia, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Toxic relationship, and Alcoholism

candournat's review against another edition

informative reflective tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

I have such mixed feelings about this book. On one hand, I loved it. It has great representation, and offers an exploration of the intersectionality of being queer and Palestinian. I loved the protagonist even though she was extremely unlikable and had so many flaws. 

But, the forgiveness and even defending of Greg after he admitted to taking advantage of a woman just really spoiled the entire book for me. It was such an unnecessary plot line that added absolutely nothing to the story, except maybe that the protagonist was very flawed — which we were already very aware of by this point in the book. 

I was also disappointed by the ending, I feel like we were introduced to some of the protagonists flings more than Anouk, and I don’t really feel that her mother’s homophobia was ever truly explored or given any sort of resolution. It was just implied that they had maybe? an OK relationship despite her mother hating that she was dating a woman. Maybe the resolve was supposed to be that her mother was just getting on with it but I just feel it could have been explored a bit more.

Despite this though, I did really enjoy the book and it did have a lot going for it — I loved the non linear narrative, and would recommend the book overall. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Toxic relationship, Infidelity, and Addiction

Moderate: Alcohol, Outing, Biphobia, War, Eating disorder, Gaslighting, and Sexual assault