Reviews with content warning for Cursing - This Is Why They Hate Us

Reviews tagging 'Cursing'

This Is Why They Hate Us by Aaron H. Aceves

8 reviews

litoreads's review against another edition

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adventurous funny hopeful lighthearted medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

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bookishmillennial's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny hopeful reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes

disclaimer if you’ve read other reviews by me and are noticing a pattern: You’re correct that I don’t really give starred reviews because I don’t like leaving them. Most often, I will only leave them if I vehemently despised a book.

I enjoy most books for what they are, & I extract lessons from them all. Everyone’s reading experiences are subjective, so I hope my reviews provide enough information to let you know if a book is for you or not, regardless if I add stars or not.

Find me on Instagram: @bookish.millennial or tiktok: @bookishmillennial

My friend Jillian recommended this and I’m so glad she did! I thought this was a beautiful explorative coming-of-age, romance & slice-of-life piece of teen fiction. 17-year-old Enrique “Qique” is exploring his bisexuality during summer break, and I am here for his messy, confusing, quick-paced ho era (affectionate!!!!)

His relationship with his parents is so sweet, and I adored the dynamic he had with his Afro-Latina best friend Fabiola, who is also bisexual! Fabiola is chasing after thick-thighed Molly, while Qique has a few contenders!

Manny — Latino tough guy exterior but sends major sexual tension Qique’ away
Tyler — white guy who shows off his package via basketball shorts & is the talk of the town; also a huge stoner & other characters call him a “wanksta”
Ziggy — buttoned-up Black student body president from school who he feels *vibes* around but everyone comments “I didn’t think he liked boys”
Saleem — his devastatingly gorgeous, short Palestinian king, his unrequited love, pining so passionately for, long time crush and best friend
Lauren — meets her at a county fair or amusement park in a group setting

What I enjoyed most about a lot of Qique’s interactions with all of his potential love interests us that he didn’t have to continually “come out” to his love interests. For the most part, they didn’t talk about their sexualities, which felt authentic to how things unravel when you’re a teenager. I also was so proud of Qique for recognizing what kinds of dynamics worked for him, how hanging out with certain people made him feel, & what he truly wanted & was searching for in these experiences.

I think Aceves did a fantastic job of layering the sex scenes in this book with commentary and introspection as to what was coming up for Qique each time. Nothing is explicit; this isn’t smût, but books like this are important for teens to investigate their own sexuality, because let’s be real. Teens are fucking. Let’s not pretend we were born yesterday. It’s important to name these feelings as they’re experiencing them, and to read about characters figuring it out as they possibly fumble through it!

Lastly, the mental health representation was immaculate — to pretend adolescence is a fever dream of solely joyful times is to deny the human experience lol. I felt for Qique so badly! I am so glad there was talk therapy in this book, and how Qique recognized that maybe he still needed these types of guided conversations. The way medication is introduced and not demonized was wonderful too.

All around, this was an excellent book and I highly recommend it to all ages, but damn, I wish I had a book like this when I was fucking at 17.

Quotations that stood out to me:

Let’s do the things that will lead to us becoming the people we want to be.”

My best friend is kind of a big deal when it comes to social media. She posts everything from political opinions to astrology memes to thirst traps to comments on her celebrity crushes’ thirst traps to analysis of her favorite shows to thoughts on the Afro-Latina experience, and has gained an almost cult following along the way. One time she posted a video of us together with the caption Me and the baby daddy, and I started getting vaguely threatening DMs from hot girls with septum piercings.

It would be so much easier not to feel anything for anyone at all. The problem is I feel so much.

“Because boys are the worst. If I could choose not to be attracted to them, I would.”

I grip my phone so hard I wonder if I might actually crush it. I did it. I’m amazing. A true queer icon.

It’s funny how everything’s a double entendre when you’re living a double life.

I’m done with people. People are exhausting. Sure, they can be fun sometimes; they can “open you up to new experiences” or whatever. But the anxiety leading up to spending time with them and the emotional drain afterward make them not worth it.

I want a person to demonstrate that it’s possible to love me, no matter what. And those three words are so important: no matter what. I want someone to love me unconditionally. I want to be certain that nothing I could ever do would make them stop.

(And yes, the official name of a group of butterflies is called a kaleidoscope. I found that out a year ago after fact-checking a Simpsons episode that claimed a flock of crows is called a murder. The show writers were right, and I’m glad to say there are plenty of strange collective animal names. A squad of flamingos is called a flamboyance! How wonderfully gay! A clique of frogs is called an army! Who are they fighting? I don’t know, but I support them!)

I don’t know. And I shouldn’t care. Because this is exhausting. I’m tired of being envious of people. It’s a never-ending list.

They are living, not just surviving. And I hate them for it. And I hate myself for hating them for it.

It always happens in the summer. People are supposed to get sad in the winter, but for me it’s always the summer. There’s too much time. Too much time to think. Too much time to feel. I

Here’s the thing about therapists: I always know what they’re gonna say. I know how I should be, how I should feel, what’s “healthy behavior.” But there’s a reason I don’t always go in that direction. When you’re poor and overworked you don’t go to the grocery store after your shift ends to shop and then go home to slave over the stove, even if that’s the healthier, more cost-efficient option. When you’re poor and overworked you go to McDonald’s, and even though you already feel guilty for ordering a large Big Mac meal, you throw in a strawberry shake because there’s a chance that fucking ...more

So often I blame myself for being lazy and dramatic, and while I’m sure I can’t blame everything on my mental illness(es), I just don’t want to be making it all up.

I’d rather not die after finding out how much there is to live for.

There’s a tension between us now, unmistakable and unwelcome.

You internalize an idea about yourself and it starts affecting how you act and you end up with a self-fulfilling prophecy. So I’m constantly doubting my attractions, my actual feelings. I’m gaslighting myself. Because the message I’ve gotten about guys who like guys and girls is that we’re faking, that we couldn’t possibly be attracted to girls if we’re attracted to boys. Bi girls get the same thing, but for them it means they’re perceived as straight and for us it means we’re perceived as gay.

Is this what those guys on the app meant when they put “not into drama” in their bios? They don’t want someone who will call them out on their bullshit? Who demands to be treated like a human being?

I hate that prejudice is a factor when it comes to my love life. I hate that it makes it seem like I see women as a second choice or a backup plan or a consolation prize when I could very well meet a girl one day who makes me redefine love. I want to be free. I don’t want to consider what people will think of me when it comes to what I want. But that’s not life. At least, not for me, not at this point in time. I hope eventually I find the courage to follow my heart when I need to, wherever it takes me.

Thinking about the fact that so many people have used religion as a way of making people like me and Saleem hate ourselves is crushing. But then I think about my parents (who still love me) and how no one group is a monolith, that no matter what your religion is, you can still choose to love others.

I don’t deserve to feel shame, to feel lonely, to be treated like a sex object, to be ignored, to be someone’s experiment. I definitely don’t deserve any of that. And I’m glad I know that now. It’s a feeling I hope doesn’t leave me for the rest of my life.

It’s not ideal, not anywhere close to that, but we make it an enchanted life. We bisexuals are, after all, mythical creatures.

I feel the weight of it, and it hurts. But I stop blocking the fear. And with it comes everything else. Joy and sadness and exhilaration.

Content Warnings

fourofclubs's review against another edition

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challenging dark inspiring

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

This book is not what I expected it to be. You should definitely look up the trigger warnings before you go into it cause it start with a lot more serious subject matter than I expected which I didn’t mind but I wish I knew before going in. Dix book is also very very sexual and definitely hyper sexualizes The bisexual main character which I really disliked. He literally hits on his 31 year old teacher. I think this book could be good for someone who needs help processing their coming out journey but I also think that it leans into stereotypes that I don’t necessarily agree with. The last sentence of the book is amazing but I feel like some of the writing is kind of immature. The entire plot of the book is the main character having sexual thoughts about other people and the main love interest his friend. It’s just not my thing

Content Warnings

pey333's review against another edition

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emotional funny

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

Content Warnings

raiynnn's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Content Warnings

imstephtacular's review against another edition

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adventurous dark emotional funny hopeful medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

Content Warnings

betweentheshelves's review

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emotional funny hopeful medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Enrique (aka Quique) is in love with his best friend, Saleem. But Saleem doesn't know it. When Saleem goes on a trip for the summer, to meet a girl his parents set him up with, Quique decides to get over his feelings for Saleem. How, do you ask? By getting his dating game on for the summer.

The only problem is Quique is really only out as bisexual to his other best friend, Fabiola, and a few others. And also, he's only been romantically with Fabiola (which turned out to be a mistake). As Quique tries to find love and the courage to be himself, he's bound to make some mistakes along the way. When summer really starts to heat up, Quique has to figure out if he truly has the courage to be himself.

Thanks to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for an advanced copy of This Is Why They Hate Us to review! Can we start by talking about this gorgeous cover? I am absolutely in love with the color palette. That pink to purple fade? One of my favorite things ever.

But I digress. At first, I wasn't quite sure about this book. It jumps right into the action and doesn't look back. However, it did not take me long to fall in love with Quique as the narrator. Quique is an absolute mess of a teenager. He knows he's bisexual, but he doesn't know how to convey that to the people he loves most (i.e. Saleem and his parents). He's trying to gain romantic and sexual experience, but doesn't really know how to do that either. I just loved him as a narrator because he felt so absolutely relatable.

Yes, there are hilarious moments in this book, but man, there are heartbreaking moments too. Quique struggles with severe anxiety and depression, and we get to see him getting help for these. There are also moments where he thinks about reasons why he's so focused on dating guys as a teenager, and guys. The reasons will probably just about break your heart.

I haven't talked about the side characters! Fabiola and Quique are two bi best friends, just trying to be there for each other. I loved that they tried the romance thing, but it wasn't for them. I don't think I've seen that very often. And Quique's obvious love and care for Saleem was adorable. Everything about it was just so well done.

All in all, this is a book I think I'm definitely going to have to buy. Because I just loved it so much.
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Oh my god, I loved this. I wasn't expecting to love this as much as I did, but wow. Stay tuned for a full review once I can process all my thoughts!

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bookstarbri's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful inspiring reflective sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

I'm sort of still reeling from this and I don't know how to properly put all my emotions from reading this into words. I loved this book. So much. It is very raw and emotional and hopeful. Somehow, these characters were able to worm themselves into my heart and make me want to laugh, cry, and scream all at once. It's a book that I'm so happy Aceves wrote because it is so relevant and needed. It truly has stood out to me.

The main character, Quique, is such a wonderful character to be with on this journey. I often see pieces of myself in many characters when I read, but I rarely relate to a character as much as I did Quique. He went through so much in this story and who he was at the start compared to the end was very different, while still feeling fundamentally true to who he is at his core. Even through his ups and downs, his success and mistakes, I felt connected with him. I was rooting for him from page 1 because he was THAT relatable. I love Quique so much and I know I will need to reread this book again many times.

The love in this story was really interesting. There were multiple relationships and the romantic ones were fun, but I loved the platonic ones a lot as well. I particularly adored Quique's friendship with Fabiola and Manny. Fabiola was so funny and she brought so much to this book in her own right. Manny was such an enigma to me and I loved him. He was so chill and literally just vibed but also was an interesting character too. Like I would literally read a book about Manny 😅

Obviously his friendship with Saleem was fantastic as well and no matter what transformed between them, their friendship was always felt wholeheartedly. Even when they were apart, I missed Saleem. His presence was felt throughout this book even when he wasn’t there and that was partially what made him such a great character. That, and he cared for Quique SOOO much. It was so obvious in all their scenes. Their friendship was nothing short of spectacular.

Then there was the familial love that I also enjoyed. Quique's parents are farrrrr from perfect. They had a lot of work to do even at the end, but they felt normal, realistic. That's what I loved so much about this book. Everything didn't magically fix itself in the end. It was a true, raw representation of how difficult it is to be a queer person and a queer teenager trying to figure yourself out. There was a lot of mental health growth with Quique and a lot he still has to work through, but it was such a worthy experience to go on part of his journey with him, even when it was toughest.

I also have to talk about the bi rep. It was so wonderfully done. For starters, we don't get a lot of bi rep in novels anyway, and even when we do, I don't feel like it's always talked about at great length. We usually get crumbs, but in this, we get the whole cake. Multiple characters are bisexual and there are many moments dedicated to discussing their experience (some of them are funny, hilarious even, and others are heavier). It was just SO incredible to have that representation and it feel as genuine as it did. I felt so seen reading this book throughout and it is so important to me. Aceves captured so many things I felt and explained my own feelings better than I could and it was so wild to read this and keep thinking "oh my gosh this is me" throughout.

Obviously, I loved this book. I will be screaming to everyone to read it. Thank you SO much to NetGalley and Simon and Schuster for providing an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review! And especially thank you to Aaron H. Aceves for writing it.

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