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michellemalonza's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.0
The book is a difficult yet comforting read for anyone struggling with grief and looking to find language for their experience. Onyi Nwabineli uses repetition to paint a detailed and heartbreaking depiction of the constant nature of grief. The author is also able to introduce us to how Africanness impacts the process of grief and what a death by suicide can mean for people in different degrees of relation to the deceased. We're also able to see how people shift responsibility around when a person who doesn't stereotypically present as unhappy/depressed dies this way.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Grief, Emotional abuse, and Chronic illness
deolivetree's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Raw depiction of grief
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Death, and Grief
ellaluka's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
sad
5.0
Amazing. Drenched in sadness & exploring the depths of grief, but the way in which her family & friends are ferociously loyal & carry the narrator through?! ugh my heart 💔❤️🩹
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief, Death, and Suicide
holliejoy's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Death, and Grief
Moderate: Suicide, Suicidal thoughts, Pregnancy, Panic attacks/disorders, Death, Eating disorder, Blood, Medical content, and Grief
jsaw's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
sad
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
It was tough to get through. But that was the point. It felt like the same thing, never-ending. The whole book was just grief, and nothing else, just making you want something more than that. It was the perfect display of what grief can be for some people.
Just the same thing every day: lay in bed. cry. sleep. over and over again.
The addition of Q’s mother’s display of pure cruelty was the perfect display of how everyone’s grief is different. And I use “perfect” begrudgingly because my heart hurt more and more every time Aspen was mentioned. Heartbreaking.
Just the same thing every day: lay in bed. cry. sleep. over and over again.
The addition of Q’s mother’s display of pure cruelty was the perfect display of how everyone’s grief is different. And I use “perfect” begrudgingly because my heart hurt more and more every time Aspen was mentioned. Heartbreaking.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death and Suicide
christopher_shiprack's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Pregnancy, Alcohol, Death, and Blood
Moderate: Suicide
teacupsandfirereads's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
This was not what I expected, but I am not sure how or why. This was presented in a way that makes a hard topic readable. I do think it was done well, but still felt the writing was lacking and felt juvenile in some sense. I didn't liked the main characters in parts, but I also understood her. Overall, I didn't connect with the book the way I wanted to.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief
Moderate: Death, Racism, and Suicide
Minor: Abortion and Gun violence
sarikinss's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I - wow. This book is a book everyone should read once, and maybe once again when they are experiencing any type of grief from loss of a loved one. Onyi Nwabineli somehow put indescribable feelings into the words that could closest describe them and that in and of itself is a gift to the world, and I truly believe it will be a comfort to those in similar situations.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Self harm, Suicide, and Suicidal thoughts
Moderate: Drug abuse and Drug use
Minor: Alcoholism
ttnnllrr's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.5
This book is about our main character, Eve, and her life after discovering her husband’s dead body after he took his own life on New Year’s Eve. Nwabineli really shows the reader the true, raw grief of losing a loved one, in ways I’ve never seen before. It’s horrible, awful, and gut wrenching, but so incredibly insightful into one of many ways grief can transform us.
At the beginning of the book, Eve spends much of her time in bed and the rest throwing up in the toilet. She binge drinks and takes pills to keep her from the waking world, only to be haunted with nightmares about her husband Q, and her guilt for being unable to save him.
We witness a loving, close knit family surrounding and supporting Eve every step of the way, no matter how many times she tries to push them away or cling too close.
Eve’s mother in law, Aspen, who had already shown hatred for her simply because she is Nigerian and not the ‘rich white girl’ Aspen always wanted Q to marry, blames Q’s death on Eve and will not rest until what remains of Eve’s life is set aflame.
Then, everything changes.Eve gets in an accident and discovers that she is pregnant with Q’s baby. She must now come to terms with her future as a widow and a single mother, and get her shit together for her kid.
This book was hard to read at times, the grief truly just oozed off the page and Eve’s decision were sometimes hard to get behind. Another reason was the fighting between Eve and her sister, Gloria, because while I understand, I also don’t know how you get mad at someone who had just lost the love of their life to something so brutal as suicide. Like I said, it was frustrating at times, but I also think that’s what makes it a great representation of grief. It’s never meant to be light and easy, it’s hard and ugly and at times violent.
I really appreciated the ending as well, because while it’s not quite a happy ending, per se, it’s clear that it’s headed in that direction at a realistic pace.
At the beginning of the book, Eve spends much of her time in bed and the rest throwing up in the toilet. She binge drinks and takes pills to keep her from the waking world, only to be haunted with nightmares about her husband Q, and her guilt for being unable to save him.
We witness a loving, close knit family surrounding and supporting Eve every step of the way, no matter how many times she tries to push them away or cling too close.
Eve’s mother in law, Aspen, who had already shown hatred for her simply because she is Nigerian and not the ‘rich white girl’ Aspen always wanted Q to marry, blames Q’s death on Eve and will not rest until what remains of Eve’s life is set aflame.
Then, everything changes.
This book was hard to read at times, the grief truly just oozed off the page and Eve’s decision were sometimes hard to get behind. Another reason was the fighting between Eve and her sister, Gloria, because while I understand, I also don’t know how you get mad at someone who had just lost the love of their life to something so brutal as suicide. Like I said, it was frustrating at times, but I also think that’s what makes it a great representation of grief. It’s never meant to be light and easy, it’s hard and ugly and at times violent.
I really appreciated the ending as well, because while it’s not quite a happy ending, per se, it’s clear that it’s headed in that direction at a realistic pace.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Death, and Grief
Moderate: Alcoholism, Blood, Mental illness, Racism, Drug abuse, and Eating disorder
michelle_my_belle's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.25
From the very beginning, this book hits you with the harsh realities of grief and it just keeps it up. I loved how real and raw the emotions and thoughts were as well as the sprinkling in of humor. I listened to this on audio and the narrator was fantastic. There were a few points when the characters' actions didn't really make sense to me, or just didn't sit right. Overall, a very good read.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Medical content, Suicide, Blood, Bullying, Pregnancy, Racism, Alcohol, Gaslighting, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, and Grief
Moderate: Drug abuse and Sexual content
Minor: Abortion and Miscarriage