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swicksy's review against another edition
4.0
Have read this book before and for a self help book, it is solid. Tries to go to the root of why humans fear going in progress and is more about empowering oneself internally and realizing how to tackle situations that feel like extreme roadblocks, but probably are not.
One of those books you revisit from time to time.
One of those books you revisit from time to time.
kimball_hansen's review against another edition
5.0
I've waited 11 years to read this book. It was recommended in my first teaching class at CGCC. And it did not disappoint.
Notes:
Fear can be broken down into 3 levels:
The surface level - those that happen (aging, retiring, accidents, death, disability, being alone, war, rape, etc) and those require action (going back to school, making decisions, changing a career, asserting oneself, public speaking, intimacy, making friends, using the telephone, relationships, etc)
Level two involves the ego (success, rejection, vulnerable, failure, being conned, loss of image). This fear has to do with inner states of mind and reflect your ability to handle this world.
Level three - I can't handle it. At the bottom of every one of your fears is simply the fear that you can't handle what life may bring you. If you knew you could handle anything that comes your way, what would you be afraid of? All you have to do to diminish your fear is to develop more trust in your ability to handle whatever comes your way. When you feel afraid it is simply because you don't feel good enough about yourself. "I'll handle it."
Fear never goes away as long as you're continuing to grow.
Doing it comes before the fear goes away.
Fear is a green light to move ahead, not to retreat.
Pushing through fear is less frightening then living with the underlying fear that comes from the feeling of helplessness.
Your power is taken away every time you say, 'I should".
When you give away your power you move closer towards pain.
Nothing is realistic or unrealistic, there is only what we think about a given situation. To handle fear is to move from a position of pain to one of power.
Ships in harbors are safe, but that's not what ships are meant for.
One of the reasons why we act so hostile when others don't support us, is our need for approval.
Instead of thinking of a right and wrong choice think of it as path A and path B. They are opportunities of experiencing life in a new way. Finding out what you don't like is, paradoxically, finding out what you do like. There's tremendous value in learning you don't like something.
Underlying all our fears is a lack of trust in ourselves.
The knowledge that you can handle things that come your way is the key to allowing yourself to take risks.
Security isn't having things, but handling them.
Not making a decision focuses on the no lose model.
If you are focused on the way it is supposed to be, you might miss on the opportunity to enjoy the way that it is.
The key to life isn't to worry about making the wrong decisions, it's learning when to correct. Confusion and dissatisfaction help you know when you should correct and get back on track.
Security is not having money, it's knowing you can survive without it.
Notes:
Fear can be broken down into 3 levels:
The surface level - those that happen (aging, retiring, accidents, death, disability, being alone, war, rape, etc) and those require action (going back to school, making decisions, changing a career, asserting oneself, public speaking, intimacy, making friends, using the telephone, relationships, etc)
Level two involves the ego (success, rejection, vulnerable, failure, being conned, loss of image). This fear has to do with inner states of mind and reflect your ability to handle this world.
Level three - I can't handle it. At the bottom of every one of your fears is simply the fear that you can't handle what life may bring you. If you knew you could handle anything that comes your way, what would you be afraid of? All you have to do to diminish your fear is to develop more trust in your ability to handle whatever comes your way. When you feel afraid it is simply because you don't feel good enough about yourself. "I'll handle it."
Fear never goes away as long as you're continuing to grow.
Doing it comes before the fear goes away.
Fear is a green light to move ahead, not to retreat.
Pushing through fear is less frightening then living with the underlying fear that comes from the feeling of helplessness.
Your power is taken away every time you say, 'I should".
When you give away your power you move closer towards pain.
Nothing is realistic or unrealistic, there is only what we think about a given situation. To handle fear is to move from a position of pain to one of power.
Ships in harbors are safe, but that's not what ships are meant for.
One of the reasons why we act so hostile when others don't support us, is our need for approval.
Instead of thinking of a right and wrong choice think of it as path A and path B. They are opportunities of experiencing life in a new way. Finding out what you don't like is, paradoxically, finding out what you do like. There's tremendous value in learning you don't like something.
Underlying all our fears is a lack of trust in ourselves.
The knowledge that you can handle things that come your way is the key to allowing yourself to take risks.
Security isn't having things, but handling them.
Not making a decision focuses on the no lose model.
If you are focused on the way it is supposed to be, you might miss on the opportunity to enjoy the way that it is.
The key to life isn't to worry about making the wrong decisions, it's learning when to correct. Confusion and dissatisfaction help you know when you should correct and get back on track.
Security is not having money, it's knowing you can survive without it.
tiffanis29's review against another edition
5.0
I feel this book was very helpful. The title was attractive and it delivered.
tommyhousworth's review
4.0
A girlfriend in grad school gave me this book, shortly before we parted ways, in fact. It was a real eye-opener to me that I lived much of my life hovering around the perimeter of the pool rather than jumping in with both feet.
Most eye-opening for me, though, was it was the first time I had been taught that fear was fine - embrace it, don't dodge it. Then, walk through the fire anyway.
I'm not saying I turned into Russell Crowe from "Gladiator" because of it. I'm still more Woody Allen from "Annie Hall", but the book did fuel me toward some braver choices in life, and I think it's a great read - not too clinical, not too esoteric - just good guidance through learning to live with the beast that resides in everyone's anxiety closet.
Most eye-opening for me, though, was it was the first time I had been taught that fear was fine - embrace it, don't dodge it. Then, walk through the fire anyway.
I'm not saying I turned into Russell Crowe from "Gladiator" because of it. I'm still more Woody Allen from "Annie Hall", but the book did fuel me toward some braver choices in life, and I think it's a great read - not too clinical, not too esoteric - just good guidance through learning to live with the beast that resides in everyone's anxiety closet.
kikiko's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
3.25
Solid book that helps you understand you can work through fear and accomplish anything you want! Easy read that gets you moving to the right direction in your life
frankie_cam's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
3.0