Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'

Une vie comme les autres by Hanya Yanagihara

153 reviews

lillianareads's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Confinement, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Fire/Fire injury, Gaslighting, Abandonment, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

maryroliza28's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I will start off by saying that this is one of the most well written, thought out, and incredible books I’ve ever read. I understand the criticism with it, some days it felt that the trauma was never ending. I’ve also read that people thought that this wasn’t a story to tell, that it was boring. I agreed at first, it has an incredibly slow start, takes about 300 pages for things to actually pick up. I read and finished 3 other books while reading this one. But, I think it helps with how you grow and develop with the characters

Let me first say, I am so sorry Jude. You were failed time and time again by so many people. You didn’t deserve any of the horrible things that happened to you. I don’t blame you for ending it, you stuck it out for as long as you could. I truly believe he would’ve lived a long and beautiful life if Willem and Malcolm didn’t die. His trauma was intense, Caleb’s scene was so nauseating and infuriating, I felt my heartache for this fictional character. I wished that, in specific, that scene could’ve been told like Dr Traylor and Brother Luke scenes, brief but to the point. I’m so glad that he was able to feel love in his life, even if the one that loved him most and so deeply left before he was ready. Harold and Julia’s storyline with him was so touching, proving that no matter how old you are, you will always need parents. I’m glad that Andy tried as hard as he could to keep him alive and healthy, if Jude didn’t die first I wouldn’t have been surprised if he killed himself after Andy died. So many people loved Jude greatly, I’m sure he knows that. He was doomed from the beginning. I wish I could tell Jude to snap out of it, to get the help he deserves. I feel as if I also never saw him as older than 30, that he stopped aging in my mind since he himself never changed. He was still denying his truth, up until the very end. I know he passed when he was about 55, but in my head he’s basically a child wearing a trench coat pretending to be an adult. And I also think he felt like that too. I wished that his happiness didn’t have a time limit, hopefully in another universe he never got hurt, he just fell in love with Willem and they got married.

Of the other three, Willem is my favorite. He treated Jude with such grace and love, they were soulmates. They needed each other. Willem’s storyline was incredible as well, I didn’t like that he said that he wasn’t gay, just in love with Jude. Like, if you are actively wanting to have sex with a man, I think you’re gay. But, despite that, he tried so hard to make sure Jude knew that he was okay and deserving of good things. My stomach dropped when he and Malcolm died, so horrifically as well. Willem has his own trauma and tried his best. I do agree with the criticism that he pictured Jude as Hemming, which is also heartbreaking. I’m glad that Jude called him out on it, but he was just trying to help the best he could.

I think he was set up to be this way, but JB was a terrible, disgusting human. I don’t care if it was because of his own trauma or because he was an addict, you do not treat your friends who have put up with so much of your shit like that. It was disgusting to see how he developed, having left a bad taste in my mouth when the last time we heard from him he kissed Jude while he was not trying to pass out. Plus, using your friends’ trauma in your own art without permission? Are you kidding!? I am a JB hater, he had the most privileged upbringing of them all and his reasoning for becoming an addict was because he wasn’t traumatized enough to keep up with Willem and Jude? Sinister behavior, genuinely mad that he was left of the four of them. I don’t blame Jude wishing that he died instead of Willem and Malcolm.

Malcolm, my sweet baby angel who just wanted to build structures and have a nice life with his wife. He was a very neutral character for me, never really upset me or made me feel like I shouldn’t like him. He deserved better, he worked so hard to get to where he was and the fact that it was all stripped from him broke me.

Harold and Julia brought out my own parental trauma, the fact that they met this damaged, troubled young boy and brought him, gave him a job and helped me just because they could is so incredible of the two of them. My favorite (and seemingly everybody’s favorite) quote is said by him at the end of the book, matter of fact on the very last page, “It isn’t only that he died, or how he died; it is what he died believing. And so I try to be kind to everything I see, and in everything I see, I see him.” I truly think Harold tried the hardest out of all of them to make sure that he was taken care of. The entire Lispenard Street section was one of the most heartbreaking shows of love I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. Harold lost two sons, both by illness and it’s heartbreaking. To love someone so much, to not care about the trauma and to treat them with such grace and gentleness is so inspiring to read. Both he and Julia are beautiful souls.

This book was also beautifully written. I don’t agree with the trauma porn accusations, there were some good parts. Trauma porn is when it’s just mindless pain and suffering with no end in sight. It’s a tragic story, genuinely, but trauma porn is too aggressive of a title. I do think you have to be in the right headspace to read this book, it was incredibly hard to read. It took me a little over two months to read it, but I did consider DNFing it a few times. But, I needed to know what would happen to Jude, poor baby Jude. Would love it if Yanagihara ever wrote an alternate universe book where they all grew old together, living on the same property in houses Malcolm built and just spending their days laughing and making art. 

I’ve grown to love and be attached to these characters. Each of them have different qualities and quirks that I love (other than you, JB). I’m so sad that my daily routine will no longer involve them, being able to know what is coming next in their lives.

I am also choosing to separate art from the artist, but part of me feels that Yanagihara did take inspiration from her own past to write this book, based on interviews. Absolutely horrific, I hope she wakes up from her own trauma soon.

5/5 stars, I would not recommend this to a friend.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Deadnaming, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Vomit, Kidnapping, Grief, Suicide attempt, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Child abuse, Child death, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Racism, and Abandonment

Minor: Infidelity

corrina_milito's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

Perhaps the most deeply tragic book I’ve ever read, A Little Life is a beautifully written heartbreaker. The abuse and violence relentlessly endured by the protagonist, Jude, is so unimaginable that at moments it seems egregious, salacious even, and almost distracting. The beauty and perseverance of deep and meaningful friendship, however, kept  me coming back for more. The depth and dimension of Yanagihara’s characters is profound but I did find myself asking she wrote this book.  I love that she is unapologetic about her novels but I still don’t have an answer to my question. The story would’ve been just as moving with only half the atrocities. I will definitely read more of her work. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Violence, Blood, Medical content, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Car accident, Suicide attempt, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Ableism, Addiction, Body shaming, Eating disorder, Vomit, and Fire/Fire injury

Minor: Bullying, Drug abuse, Drug use, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Forced institutionalization, Dementia, Stalking, Death of parent, Fire/Fire injury, and Classism

k_coston's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

0.25

I need the author in jail
I go into recommendations blind and all I heard was this made people on tiktok cry, so here is my review after listening to the audiobook for 3 months spoilers are present

1. there's a problem with how there was no care provided to Jude after he got outta his situation like Anya ow whatever her name was didn't set up any counseling after what he went and survived through???? OK, it seems fake, but ok

2. he's such a victim, like it's hard for me to feel sympathy when they unravel his story intermittently throughout the book . It explains why he's like that but it's just a me thing that I didn't like how the book was set up I almost would've wanted them to wait until the end to reveal what happened to him

3. I feel like the author was deriving pleasure how much she was dumping on Jude, like it was extremely hard to continue at times, and I would've dnfed if I was reading the actual book.  I feel like that experience with Dr trailer was completely unnecessary to the story like it was just like "again really we already did this with brother luke" while listening to it also the story of how the Dr got Jude needed to be explained more throughly

4. willem and Jude had respect for each other but not love like willem took advantage of Jude and that really disgusted me when we found out he suspected Jude didn't like having sex with him and he still subjected him to it? after already guessing he had sexual trauma, you did that to the person you supposedly loved most? actually, he didn't even respect him. You don't do that to people you love.

5. how does Jude have a backbone in only 1 area of his life? only work. on top of not having a backbone, he doesn't have a personality! he doesnt share anything about himself it seems like he's being pitied by everyone around him all the time, like he does not develop whatsoever from page one and I feel like I myself don't know anything about Jude other than he doesn't like himself but even after a while a victim has to take a stand for themselves and we're rooting for him to get some self esteem and it just never develops. if you don't have a backbone for yourself and for no one else, how are you supposed to stand the test of time? how are you supposed to take the rocks that life throw at you??? that's exactly why Caleb was allowed to do what he did to Jude and why Jude was always bound to kill himself in the end.

6. this is a book that doesn't have any character development in the slightest and I was holding out until the last moment that the author would do the humane thing and give Jude a happy ending but no.  it was a vile book of trauma porn with no resolution so you spend the entire book reading about unthinkable pain and suffering so much so that you start wanting him to die to put him out of his misery.

very cruel Hanya.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Cancer, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Vomit, Medical content, Trafficking, Grief, Religious bigotry, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail

catarina187's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

This story is absolutely devastating. Even though I didn't know what awaited me before reading, I knew that this wasn't going to be a book like any other. And it definitely wasn't. This was the first and only book that made me cry, that made me suffer absurdly with the characters and that made me really feel the pain and confusion that was the life of each of them.

This story tells us, among other things, about abuse, violence and mistreatment, but also about someone who managed to overcome his weaknesses and insecurities, with a lot of support from those closest to him. This book touches on very delicate and sensitive topics and is not for everyone. However, I can say that this was one of the best books I've read, not only because of the raw and delicate way in which it was written, but because of each of the characters that appear in this book, each one being more imperfect than the other, but nevertheless, showing all your emotions, in all their splendor. I cannot, in good conscience, recommend this book to anyone, but I can say that this book completely changed the way I read and interpret the stories I read and changed my way of thinking a little.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Bullying, Cancer, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Grief, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, and Abandonment

Moderate: Cancer, Chronic illness, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Grief, Car accident, and Gaslighting

sofiam19's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Beautiful, heartbreaking… literally it’s life. Not a book I’d recommend for most people as it’s very HEAVY content. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Trafficking, Grief, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Abandonment, Injury/Injury detail, and Classism

becphe's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring mysterious reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

Devastating and so good.  The characters rich and complicated. The relationships felt genuine.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Confinement, Death, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Trafficking, Grief, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Outing, and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Ableism, Addiction, Confinement, Cursing, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Dysphoria

Minor: Incest, Infidelity, Medical content, Kidnapping, and Injury/Injury detail

juliarenae's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

good and heart wrenching but also torture porn. made me feel queasy several times

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Medical content, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Sexual harassment, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

theresa_timber's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Never has a book so utterly and completely shattered my heart. I simultaneously want to recommend this book to everyone capable of handling it, while also burying it deep inside a safe cushioned capsule where nothing bad will happen to the characters ever again.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Confinement, Cursing, Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Stalking, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail

dbsuperslayer's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Acephobia/Arophobia, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail