You need to sign in or sign up before continuing.
Take a photo of a barcode or cover
4.16 AVERAGE
4.16 AVERAGE
This book was very sweet. I’ve read a lot of romance, and I don’t use that word often. Lots of books are cozy or steamy or romantic. This one was very sweet. I read running with the wind first, and I LOVED it. This one is set in the same world (I loved being back there), but also had a very different tone- in a good way. It brought in elements I recognized while also being a very different story. And the characters felt multi-dimensional. I will definitely re-read.
adventurous
emotional
funny
mysterious
reflective
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Alexandra Rowland, you've done it again.
Perfect book, perfect romance, perfect plot.
The relationship between the characters felt very real, especially between Kadou and Evermer. They start by disliking each other for very valid reasons, and we slowly see them get closer, get to know each other, and eventually fall in love. They are both so good for each other in every way. And the yearning by the end reached peaks, omg I was kicking my feet and having to take a few laps around my room to calm myself down lol.
The story itself was also really gripping in my opinion. I was on the edge of my seats multiple times, and I loved all the situations our MCs got put through, lots of hurt/comfort :P
Anyway, I'm on my way to read all of Alex's books now, bye!
Perfect book, perfect romance, perfect plot.
The relationship between the characters felt very real, especially between Kadou and Evermer. They start by disliking each other for very valid reasons, and we slowly see them get closer, get to know each other, and eventually fall in love. They are both so good for each other in every way. And the yearning by the end reached peaks, omg I was kicking my feet and having to take a few laps around my room to calm myself down lol.
The story itself was also really gripping in my opinion. I was on the edge of my seats multiple times, and I loved all the situations our MCs got put through, lots of hurt/comfort :P
Anyway, I'm on my way to read all of Alex's books now, bye!
Absolutely stunningly fantastic. This wholly captivated me from the very beginning. Best book of the year so far I think, aside from The House on the Cerulean Sea.
adventurous
emotional
(Re-read as audio book and I loved it)
A real love letter to the anxious babes out there. Beautiful slow burn, and the characters - ah!! Tadek is hilarious, Evemer all distraught is like free therapy to me, and Kadou is just perfect.
Plot, pining, hilarious one liners... this book checks all my boxes.
A real love letter to the anxious babes out there. Beautiful slow burn, and the characters - ah!! Tadek is hilarious, Evemer all distraught is like free therapy to me, and Kadou is just perfect.
Plot, pining, hilarious one liners... this book checks all my boxes.
Popsugar reading challenge: A fiction book by a trans or nonbinary author
While we're on the topic of books knowing what they are... here's one where I have no clue what it's supposed to be.
God, I don't know how I am going to start this review.
OK so one of the main character's-Kadou- has anxiety with frequent panic attacks, right? He lives in a society where they don't really have a word for this (despite having clergy that are functionally therapists.) He calls it his fear monster or his cowardice. This is fine. Mental illness has always existed, but terminology and understanding related to it ebbs and flows. But yeah he lives in a society where understanding seems to have ebbed- except they have therapists???? idek- and he doesn't seem to know what he's dealing with.
Except he has moments of unbelievable emotional intelligence. There's a moment where Evemer straight up asks him why he's so afraid all the time. Kadou lets loose a whole monologue about an extremely traumatic experience in his formative years, and how it ties in with his royal responsibilities. People call this kind trope therapyspeak, but honestly? honestly honestly???? revelations in therapy usually don't come out all neat and tidy like that when you're feeling that agitated. Maybe Kadou hashed this out with the THERAPY PRIESTS (????) so he has this explanation at hand but if so we should have gotten a session early on with a THERAPY PRIEST!!!!! to demonstrate why he has such emotional intelligence about some things.
(Sorry to keep harping on about the therapy priests but they just feel so worldbuilding breaking for me.)
Also almost every major character has a moment like this, where they rationally explain the Trauma™️ that helps shape their Fatal Flaw™️. And again I'm not saying you can't have revelations about why certain things trigger you. At this point I can explain why my OCD latches on to issues of contamination/infestation/illness so easily. But it's never going to be quite as polished as everyone is about it in this book. If we had even one moment with a character ranting about something they hate and then talking about a childhood experience with it and oh OH??? that's why I fear XYZ??? Holy shit??? I'd feel a lot better about it. Evemer kind of has revelations like that during a session with one of the therapy priests (see! no exclamations this time!) but it's all so staid and antiseptic that it didn't work for me.
Staid and antiseptic kind of describes this whole book, to be honest. It's like... it wants to play around with the power imbalances borne out of being in an absolute monarchy and the tension they bring to literally every relationship one has.
Except it feels kind of like the author was anticipating the "omg problematic relationship!!!" reviews that would come up on goodreads, or something. Because literally every time the romantic relationship levels up the two characters will talk for multiple pages how it's totally fine and consensual and both partners want it and here's how the character lower on the hierarchy actually really for real has an equal amount of power here, we promise!!
And all this before they even start touching, by the way.
Now, I'm absolutely not saying this book needed sexual assault and/or coercion. But stopping every few pages to go THIS IS ALL! EQUAL! AND CONSENSUAL! WE PROMISE!! had the effect of actually making me go "but is it tho?" And it always is but man... it really took me out.
Also if you want this to be a cinnamon* roll romance where there's never any sort of genuine narrative tension over the hierarchy or the possibility of accidental coercion... why the actual fuck are we playing around with an absolute monarchy with bodyguards sworn to absolute loyalty/devotion? My guy Evemer is willing to because Kadou asks him to do it, all because Kadou happened to be born into a particular dynasty. That part was genuinely thrilling and nervewracking! But then a couple pages later it's like "oh by the way here's why that wasn't as bad as it looked and now Evemer can disobey orders whenever he wants so it's cool. IT'S COOL!!"
The book just keeps doing this... gesturing at something thornier and darker and then going don't worry about it. This is fine. Don't! Worry! About it!
Okay it's time for another list because otherwise I'll be here all day:
1. The sultan is supposed to be extremely smart and capable but the plot hinges on her being so into her boyfriend that she misses that he's a mustache twirling villain who's constantly menacing her beloved brother. This isn't a problem per se, but it did merit some exploration of why she's so enthralled by this romantic relationship. You could very easily explore something where she's been so devoted to her role (a theme of this book. supposedly.) that it just left her completely unprepared for the first time sexual attraction really knocked her off her feet. But nah, she's left pretty one-dimensional.
2. Love incidental queerness, but this society is sooooo extremely focused on matters of reproduction that even a slight gesture towards how queer people fit into this paradigm would have been nice. I guess we sort of get it when they're pondering arranged marriages for Kadou but... not really? Mostly we just hear that his sister thought the potential match would vibe well with Kadou or whatever. There are talks about diplomatic advantages to the potential marriage and how it will be a shame to lose out on them... WHAT ARE THEY! NAME THEM! HOLY SHIT???? I'm not asking for homophobia and transphobia. Just a tiny bit more thought here?
3. This is supposedly a society based on the Ottoman empire but mostly it's just the aesthetic. Really didn't see anything Ottoman about it at all.
4. Honestly was pretty interested in the system where family lines are traced matrilineally and the father doesn't get much of a say in the child's life unless it's arranged through the courts. There's some tension when a princess's father is foreign and is very upset about how he has no legal ties to his own kid.... So it doesn't just go 'if women were in charge everything would be great and no one would be upset' (after all, the ancient Egyptians tended to only accept leaders if they were born to a princess.) This was genuinely pretty cool and complex!! WISH THERE HAD BEEN MORE STUFF LIKE IT!!
5. I feel like Tadek stole the whole goddamn book. Like, yes his dialogue is often set to "slightly depraved bisexual who mostly just thinks about sex ™️" but we actually get some pretty tense/heartwrenching moments with him in the beginning having to regroup after his entire life changes on his. He also easily has the most believable arc. I appreciated him and he made me laugh out loud once or twice (I added on a star just for him) but he also angers me a bit because- like the exploration of issues that would come up with matrilineal descent- it's like DAMN we could have done this the whole TIME?
6. WHY BRING IN THE THERAPY PRIESTS AT THE END?
*When people talk about cinnamon roll characters, it's like we all forget that cinnamon is a bit spicy and has a touch of pain with it.
While we're on the topic of books knowing what they are... here's one where I have no clue what it's supposed to be.
God, I don't know how I am going to start this review.
OK so one of the main character's-Kadou- has anxiety with frequent panic attacks, right? He lives in a society where they don't really have a word for this (despite having clergy that are functionally therapists.) He calls it his fear monster or his cowardice. This is fine. Mental illness has always existed, but terminology and understanding related to it ebbs and flows. But yeah he lives in a society where understanding seems to have ebbed- except they have therapists???? idek- and he doesn't seem to know what he's dealing with.
Except he has moments of unbelievable emotional intelligence. There's a moment where Evemer straight up asks him why he's so afraid all the time. Kadou lets loose a whole monologue about an extremely traumatic experience in his formative years, and how it ties in with his royal responsibilities. People call this kind trope therapyspeak, but honestly? honestly honestly???? revelations in therapy usually don't come out all neat and tidy like that when you're feeling that agitated. Maybe Kadou hashed this out with the THERAPY PRIESTS (????) so he has this explanation at hand but if so we should have gotten a session early on with a THERAPY PRIEST!!!!! to demonstrate why he has such emotional intelligence about some things.
(Sorry to keep harping on about the therapy priests but they just feel so worldbuilding breaking for me.)
Also almost every major character has a moment like this, where they rationally explain the Trauma™️ that helps shape their Fatal Flaw™️. And again I'm not saying you can't have revelations about why certain things trigger you. At this point I can explain why my OCD latches on to issues of contamination/infestation/illness so easily. But it's never going to be quite as polished as everyone is about it in this book. If we had even one moment with a character ranting about something they hate and then talking about a childhood experience with it and oh OH??? that's why I fear XYZ??? Holy shit??? I'd feel a lot better about it. Evemer kind of has revelations like that during a session with one of the therapy priests (see! no exclamations this time!) but it's all so staid and antiseptic that it didn't work for me.
Staid and antiseptic kind of describes this whole book, to be honest. It's like... it wants to play around with the power imbalances borne out of being in an absolute monarchy and the tension they bring to literally every relationship one has.
Except it feels kind of like the author was anticipating the "omg problematic relationship!!!" reviews that would come up on goodreads, or something. Because literally every time the romantic relationship levels up the two characters will talk for multiple pages how it's totally fine and consensual and both partners want it and here's how the character lower on the hierarchy actually really for real has an equal amount of power here, we promise!!
And all this before they even start touching, by the way.
Spoiler
And just to drive home how very very very consensual and unproblematic all this is, when the two start kissing, the sultan grants Evemer special privileges so he can disobey orders.Now, I'm absolutely not saying this book needed sexual assault and/or coercion. But stopping every few pages to go THIS IS ALL! EQUAL! AND CONSENSUAL! WE PROMISE!! had the effect of actually making me go "but is it tho?" And it always is but man... it really took me out.
Also if you want this to be a cinnamon* roll romance where there's never any sort of genuine narrative tension over the hierarchy or the possibility of accidental coercion... why the actual fuck are we playing around with an absolute monarchy with bodyguards sworn to absolute loyalty/devotion? My guy Evemer is willing to
Spoiler
cut off his own handThe book just keeps doing this... gesturing at something thornier and darker and then going don't worry about it. This is fine. Don't! Worry! About it!
Okay it's time for another list because otherwise I'll be here all day:
1. The sultan is supposed to be extremely smart and capable but the plot hinges on her being so into her boyfriend that she misses that he's a mustache twirling villain who's constantly menacing her beloved brother. This isn't a problem per se, but it did merit some exploration of why she's so enthralled by this romantic relationship. You could very easily explore something where she's been so devoted to her role (a theme of this book. supposedly.) that it just left her completely unprepared for the first time sexual attraction really knocked her off her feet. But nah, she's left pretty one-dimensional.
2. Love incidental queerness, but this society is sooooo extremely focused on matters of reproduction that even a slight gesture towards how queer people fit into this paradigm would have been nice. I guess we sort of get it when they're pondering arranged marriages for Kadou but... not really? Mostly we just hear that his sister thought the potential match would vibe well with Kadou or whatever. There are talks about diplomatic advantages to the potential marriage and how it will be a shame to lose out on them... WHAT ARE THEY! NAME THEM! HOLY SHIT???? I'm not asking for homophobia and transphobia. Just a tiny bit more thought here?
3. This is supposedly a society based on the Ottoman empire but mostly it's just the aesthetic. Really didn't see anything Ottoman about it at all.
4. Honestly was pretty interested in the system where family lines are traced matrilineally and the father doesn't get much of a say in the child's life unless it's arranged through the courts. There's some tension when a princess's father is foreign and is very upset about how he has no legal ties to his own kid.... So it doesn't just go 'if women were in charge everything would be great and no one would be upset' (after all, the ancient Egyptians tended to only accept leaders if they were born to a princess.) This was genuinely pretty cool and complex!! WISH THERE HAD BEEN MORE STUFF LIKE IT!!
5. I feel like Tadek stole the whole goddamn book. Like, yes his dialogue is often set to "slightly depraved bisexual who mostly just thinks about sex ™️" but we actually get some pretty tense/heartwrenching moments with him in the beginning having to regroup after his entire life changes on his. He also easily has the most believable arc. I appreciated him and he made me laugh out loud once or twice (I added on a star just for him) but he also angers me a bit because- like the exploration of issues that would come up with matrilineal descent- it's like DAMN we could have done this the whole TIME?
6. WHY BRING IN THE THERAPY PRIESTS AT THE END?
*When people talk about cinnamon roll characters, it's like we all forget that cinnamon is a bit spicy and has a touch of pain with it.
adventurous
dark
emotional
hopeful
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
“There he was, familiar and comfortable. That’s what it felt like. Like his heart, or whatever part of him it was that yearned for someone worthy to serve, had recognised the person he was meant to follow. The person he was meant to die for. There he was.”
Ugh, what can I say? This was an insanely good read, brimming with political tension, yearning romance, and familial love. The wonderfully queernorm world, inspired by the Ottoman Empire, was brought to life with stunning detail and colourful imagery. The court politics were cutthroat and intricate, forcing the characters to navigate a twisty, dangerous labyrinth of intrigue that was as enjoyable as it was brilliantly constructed. But best of all were the characters; Rowland has a deft touch with bringing their characters to life, from the fierce warrior Eozena to flirtatious Tadek. They were all so individual and alluring, and I was invested in each of their trials. But none more so than Kadou and Evemer, whose slow-burn romance was overflowing with devotion, acceptance, and tension. They were both such complex, loving characters, and their journey together was really moving. I would also like to thank Alexandra Rowland for single-handedly bringing back yearning - by god did these boys yearn for each other and I absolutely lapped it up. There were some technical issues, such as the core mystery being a tad too predictable, but it never damaged my overall enjoyment of this story. In fact, I wanted it to be longer 😂 This will absolutely be a reread for me and I have every intention of picking up Rowland’s other books!
Ugh, what can I say? This was an insanely good read, brimming with political tension, yearning romance, and familial love. The wonderfully queernorm world, inspired by the Ottoman Empire, was brought to life with stunning detail and colourful imagery. The court politics were cutthroat and intricate, forcing the characters to navigate a twisty, dangerous labyrinth of intrigue that was as enjoyable as it was brilliantly constructed. But best of all were the characters; Rowland has a deft touch with bringing their characters to life, from the fierce warrior Eozena to flirtatious Tadek. They were all so individual and alluring, and I was invested in each of their trials. But none more so than Kadou and Evemer, whose slow-burn romance was overflowing with devotion, acceptance, and tension. They were both such complex, loving characters, and their journey together was really moving. I would also like to thank Alexandra Rowland for single-handedly bringing back yearning - by god did these boys yearn for each other and I absolutely lapped it up. There were some technical issues, such as the core mystery being a tad too predictable, but it never damaged my overall enjoyment of this story. In fact, I wanted it to be longer 😂 This will absolutely be a reread for me and I have every intention of picking up Rowland’s other books!
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual content, Violence
Minor: Death of parent
Truly one of the most egregious offenders I've ever come across in the "every character is talking like they want to get an A+ in group therapy" stakes. Where is the CONFLICT where is the DRAMA? This would have been a DNF after the first hundred or so pages, except I'm invested in the journeys of fan authors gone pro and even more invested in my hypothesis about toothless m/m romances written by fanficcers.... this one joins the club! This is one of the worse examples of the club! The worldbuilding is pale and ineffective, viz. the three genders which don't have any effect on how characters live their lives, viz. the wishy washy state religion which also doesn't seem to have much effect on how characters live their lives, and viz., MOST bafflingly, a magical power to touch metal and divine its composition which could have been swapped out for a particularly perceptive goldsmith with very little plot ramification. Genuinely, that last one baffled me. Did Rowland think this was subversive? It's like giving your main character and about ten percent of the population the ability to fly, and then having him on 2 occasions fly up to the top of a tower and confirm that the stonework is falling apart. You know we can figure that out without flying? Are you going to do anything else, with the flying? Actually it's even worse: our main character isn't a strong enough flyer to get to the top of the tower, so he just watches someone else do it instead. I DON'T understand this part of the story.
The mystery was Not a mystery, the politics of this supposedly labyrinthine court were nonexistent. The relationship development followed beats which were always predictable and never felt well executed. Evermer hates Kadou briefly for causing some deaths and gets over this comically fast; he promptly becomes the poster boy for staunchly loyal affection ready to chop his own arm off at the whims of this guy he hated a few days ago; there is a requisite period of mutual pining where they both hate themselves passionately; they iron this out and fuck on the grass. To give Rowland credit, I think some parts of this were decently written -- the mutual pining in particular got me, a sappy idiot, in the heart parts, and was the only reason I considered bumping this up to 2 stars -- but the transitions between all of them felt clumsy and abrupt at best, like the characters were just being pushed hastily from point A to B because that's where we want them to be now. I never did manage to believe that this was a natural journey they were on, and as a result it brought even the better-written parts down for me; you'll notice this is a one-star review. As a whole the writing felt extremely bland and occasionally very clumsy, although I might have been focusing on it more than I usually would since the storyline was offering me absolutely nothing to chew on. In one moment towards the end of the book, servants "pour" Kadou into his clothes, and then in the next sentence he gets kissed and "goes liquid". I was like, wait, but if they were pouring him, he was already liquid.... that's the level of nitpicking I was operating on here. I do maintain that is a silly passage though. Anyway, whatever, I read this to sate my curiosity and it was sated. I didn't like this book very much.
The mystery was Not a mystery, the politics of this supposedly labyrinthine court were nonexistent. The relationship development followed beats which were always predictable and never felt well executed. Evermer hates Kadou briefly for causing some deaths and gets over this comically fast; he promptly becomes the poster boy for staunchly loyal affection ready to chop his own arm off at the whims of this guy he hated a few days ago; there is a requisite period of mutual pining where they both hate themselves passionately; they iron this out and fuck on the grass. To give Rowland credit, I think some parts of this were decently written -- the mutual pining in particular got me, a sappy idiot, in the heart parts, and was the only reason I considered bumping this up to 2 stars -- but the transitions between all of them felt clumsy and abrupt at best, like the characters were just being pushed hastily from point A to B because that's where we want them to be now. I never did manage to believe that this was a natural journey they were on, and as a result it brought even the better-written parts down for me; you'll notice this is a one-star review. As a whole the writing felt extremely bland and occasionally very clumsy, although I might have been focusing on it more than I usually would since the storyline was offering me absolutely nothing to chew on. In one moment towards the end of the book, servants "pour" Kadou into his clothes, and then in the next sentence he gets kissed and "goes liquid". I was like, wait, but if they were pouring him, he was already liquid.... that's the level of nitpicking I was operating on here. I do maintain that is a silly passage though. Anyway, whatever, I read this to sate my curiosity and it was sated. I didn't like this book very much.
adventurous
emotional
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
N/A
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
i wasnt prepared for it to end and now i am adrift
Loveable characters:
Yes
What a treat.
I was reticent to start reading this because it felt too long and too dense and too romantasy-y. But the pages flew by. I couldn't wait to pick up the book again every time I put it down. The characters are fantastic, the worldbuilding is luscious, the plot, who cares about that? I enjoyed this novel immensely.
I was reticent to start reading this because it felt too long and too dense and too romantasy-y. But the pages flew by. I couldn't wait to pick up the book again every time I put it down. The characters are fantastic, the worldbuilding is luscious, the plot, who cares about that? I enjoyed this novel immensely.