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wasauthor's review against another edition
5.0
I received an advance reader copy of [b:Cousin Calls|58878054|Cousin Calls|Zeb Haradon|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1630193188l/58878054._SX50_.jpg|92755105] for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
While [a:Zeb Haradon|17366017|Zeb Haradon|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1529842198p2/17366017.jpg]'s Cousin Calls is set at Christmas, it is as much a Christmas story as Die Hard (or my personal favourite, Batman Returns). Rather than it being a book all about love, wonder and Christmas magic, it is instead a book all about horse crap, the dangers of technology, more crap (that may or may not have come from a horse), deer brutality, and even more crap (aka Donald Trump).
The central conceit of Cousin Calls is receiving a phone call or text message, saying "you don’t know me, but we’re cousins." This is a bad omen, and as a result, some truly horrible (or horribly hilarious) things will happen. This is broken up into five short stories, summarised below:
“World’s Greatest Chili,” where the cousin call leads to a trip between the storyteller and her boyfriend to attend a chilli cook-off where they are assured they will sample the world’s greatest chilli.
- “The Shadow Thief,” where the cousin call kicks off a series of events where the story’s protagonist’s hippocampal implant designed download other people’s learnings gives him more than he bargained for.
- “The Mysterious Case of Who Was Wiping Shit All Over the Bathroom Walls,” where the cousin call leads to a private detective trying to solve the mystery so beautifully illustrated in its title.
- “The Lucky Bucks,” where a deer’s cousin call leads to a mating season that doesn’t go as well as he had hoped.
- “The True Story of Douchebag Dave,” where the cousin call leads to a sequence of events spanning much of 2020.
I will warn you, however, that this is a transgressive book with a number of distasteful elements. However, this book is so well-written that these elements are more than simply horrifying moments. If this sounds like your thing, I have no doubt that you'll love it. If you're unsure, I'd suggest you take a look yourself. But if the distasteful elements sound like they'd offend you, or if you're sympathetic to Donald Trump, you may wish to avoid reading it.
My full review will be posted on my website from 9 December. Feel free to check it out here.
While [a:Zeb Haradon|17366017|Zeb Haradon|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1529842198p2/17366017.jpg]'s Cousin Calls is set at Christmas, it is as much a Christmas story as Die Hard (or my personal favourite, Batman Returns). Rather than it being a book all about love, wonder and Christmas magic, it is instead a book all about horse crap, the dangers of technology, more crap (that may or may not have come from a horse), deer brutality, and even more crap (aka Donald Trump).
The central conceit of Cousin Calls is receiving a phone call or text message, saying "you don’t know me, but we’re cousins." This is a bad omen, and as a result, some truly horrible (or horribly hilarious) things will happen. This is broken up into five short stories, summarised below:
“World’s Greatest Chili,” where the cousin call leads to a trip between the storyteller and her boyfriend to attend a chilli cook-off where they are assured they will sample the world’s greatest chilli.
- “The Shadow Thief,” where the cousin call kicks off a series of events where the story’s protagonist’s hippocampal implant designed download other people’s learnings gives him more than he bargained for.
- “The Mysterious Case of Who Was Wiping Shit All Over the Bathroom Walls,” where the cousin call leads to a private detective trying to solve the mystery so beautifully illustrated in its title.
- “The Lucky Bucks,” where a deer’s cousin call leads to a mating season that doesn’t go as well as he had hoped.
- “The True Story of Douchebag Dave,” where the cousin call leads to a sequence of events spanning much of 2020.
I will warn you, however, that this is a transgressive book with a number of distasteful elements. However, this book is so well-written that these elements are more than simply horrifying moments. If this sounds like your thing, I have no doubt that you'll love it. If you're unsure, I'd suggest you take a look yourself. But if the distasteful elements sound like they'd offend you, or if you're sympathetic to Donald Trump, you may wish to avoid reading it.
My full review will be posted on my website from 9 December. Feel free to check it out here.
eshurricane's review against another edition
5.0
Pure Delightful Insanity
I don’t even know where to start with this book! And I mean that in the best possible way. I was drawn to this book because of the chatty narrative style, and I thought the premise was fun. Harold gets a call from someone claiming to be his cousin, and while’s he’s waiting to meet up with her at a bar, hears from all of the patrons there why he should never accept a cousin call.
Each one of them (including one that I won’t spoil for you but it’s insane and I love it) has a story about their own disastrous cousin call, and the shenanigans that ensued after. They are all obscenely funny and viscerally disgusting, which are two things I love together.
The narrative voice is great, and I love the subtle differences between each character’s POV as they tell their stories. It feels like I’m sitting in a bar with a bunch of people while they tell me stories, and is so absorbing. The only issue I had was that I wanted more of each one. These stories are so immersive and have so many moving parts that I could have read a whole book about just that character and their tale. But the concise punchy way this is presented works for what it is.
Overall, I’d recommend to anyone looking for a fun read with some OMFG moments that will have you laughing and cringing at the same time. I can’t wait to check out what else Zeb Haradon has to offer!
(Just wanted to add a quick TW note that the final story takes place during covid with reactions to election and BLM events in case you’re a reader trying to avoid that right now.)
I don’t even know where to start with this book! And I mean that in the best possible way. I was drawn to this book because of the chatty narrative style, and I thought the premise was fun. Harold gets a call from someone claiming to be his cousin, and while’s he’s waiting to meet up with her at a bar, hears from all of the patrons there why he should never accept a cousin call.
Each one of them (including one that I won’t spoil for you but it’s insane and I love it) has a story about their own disastrous cousin call, and the shenanigans that ensued after. They are all obscenely funny and viscerally disgusting, which are two things I love together.
The narrative voice is great, and I love the subtle differences between each character’s POV as they tell their stories. It feels like I’m sitting in a bar with a bunch of people while they tell me stories, and is so absorbing. The only issue I had was that I wanted more of each one. These stories are so immersive and have so many moving parts that I could have read a whole book about just that character and their tale. But the concise punchy way this is presented works for what it is.
Overall, I’d recommend to anyone looking for a fun read with some OMFG moments that will have you laughing and cringing at the same time. I can’t wait to check out what else Zeb Haradon has to offer!
(Just wanted to add a quick TW note that the final story takes place during covid with reactions to election and BLM events in case you’re a reader trying to avoid that right now.)
heatheradoresbooks's review against another edition
4.0
3.75⭐ rounded up.
Featuring ~ elements of sci-fi, extraterrestrial life and politics.
Weird. This is the first word that comes to my mind about this book. Not a bad weird really, just weird. And if you read it you’ll know what I mean. To be honest ~ I probably never would have read this book if the author didn’t reach out to me (no offense, Zeb), but I am not mad that he did.
There are 5 different stories, within the story, that were unique and kept me engaged. It's obvious there was some research that went into the writing of this book.
We start off with Harold, who arrives in a self driving car to the Coffin Bar. He is there to meet a cousin he didn't know existed. When it looks like she is a no show, he stays there for many hours and many drinks listening to other peoples stories about their own 'cousin calls'.
My thoughts on each story:
Annie
Annie and Gaelen fly to Texas for a big family reunion chili cook-off.
Gaelen is quite the tool from the start and throughout the whole entire story. There was not one point at all that I thought he was an okay character.
Do Texans really say ‘howdy’ so much?
Ward
I'm not sure if a hippocampal prosthetic is a thing, but the author made me believe it could be if it's not.
It's so easy to get swept up into craziness when there’s debt involved and you just keep digging a hole for yourself.
I got stalkerish vibes with this guy and wowza with his fetish ~ is this real too?
Gordon
Gordon is a Private Investigator and he gets the grossest case in history of all grossness that could ever be.
Alex
I liked this interesting perspective from a deer.
My takeaway ~ one mistake, whether it's from territorial possessiveness or jealousy, can lead to a lifetime of hurt.
Mortimer has some really deep thoughts to share.
Jane
Jane is a single mother to 9 year old Chase, who has ADHD. They live above Douchebag Dave and have problems with him from the start and it dragged on and on and on.
This was my least favorite story.
I did not care for the current events and political aspect at all.
All in all, these stories were very unique and well thought out.
*Thank you Zeb for providing me with a copy. I am voluntarily leaving my honest review*
Follow me here ➡ Blog ~ Facebook
Featuring ~ elements of sci-fi, extraterrestrial life and politics.
Weird. This is the first word that comes to my mind about this book. Not a bad weird really, just weird. And if you read it you’ll know what I mean. To be honest ~ I probably never would have read this book if the author didn’t reach out to me (no offense, Zeb), but I am not mad that he did.
There are 5 different stories, within the story, that were unique and kept me engaged. It's obvious there was some research that went into the writing of this book.
We start off with Harold, who arrives in a self driving car to the Coffin Bar. He is there to meet a cousin he didn't know existed. When it looks like she is a no show, he stays there for many hours and many drinks listening to other peoples stories about their own 'cousin calls'.
My thoughts on each story:
Annie
Annie and Gaelen fly to Texas for a big family reunion chili cook-off.
Gaelen is quite the tool from the start and throughout the whole entire story. There was not one point at all that I thought he was an okay character.
Do Texans really say ‘howdy’ so much?
Ward
I'm not sure if a hippocampal prosthetic is a thing, but the author made me believe it could be if it's not.
It's so easy to get swept up into craziness when there’s debt involved and you just keep digging a hole for yourself.
I got stalkerish vibes with this guy and wowza with his fetish ~ is this real too?
Gordon
Gordon is a Private Investigator and he gets the grossest case in history of all grossness that could ever be.
Alex
I liked this interesting perspective from a deer.
My takeaway ~ one mistake, whether it's from territorial possessiveness or jealousy, can lead to a lifetime of hurt.
Mortimer has some really deep thoughts to share.
Jane
Jane is a single mother to 9 year old Chase, who has ADHD. They live above Douchebag Dave and have problems with him from the start and it dragged on and on and on.
This was my least favorite story.
I did not care for the current events and political aspect at all.
All in all, these stories were very unique and well thought out.
*Thank you Zeb for providing me with a copy. I am voluntarily leaving my honest review*
Follow me here ➡ Blog ~ Facebook
charliadams's review against another edition
funny
medium-paced
3.0
I did not know what to expect with this story. This differed from what I am used to reading, but I kind of liked it. I have seen this style of storytelling in movies and television, but this is the first for me as a book style. The book held my interest, but in all honesty, it was a struggle at the beginning. After I got through with that, it was an easy read from then on.
There is not a specific main character per se. What this book did was, there is a character who is listening to tales from these bar regulars. Each one had incidences involving a call that started with “you don’t know me, but we’re cousins.” These characters were interesting in their own way. They were well written, and each one allowed the book to move forward without slowing down.
Like the character, there were many settings in this book. The main setting would be the bar, but you have very little time before another story starts. The stories the regulars tell are from different locations and time eras. There are very science fiction things written into this that, as a reader, you can forget until something futuristic comes along.
This was an interesting book. There were some stories I was like “what am I reading” but after I trudged along and kept reading, my interest still held. If you like humor and multiple stories, then this is the book for you.
*I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book, and this is my honest opinion.
You can find this and other reviews on my website:
https://www.charliadamswriter.com
There is not a specific main character per se. What this book did was, there is a character who is listening to tales from these bar regulars. Each one had incidences involving a call that started with “you don’t know me, but we’re cousins.” These characters were interesting in their own way. They were well written, and each one allowed the book to move forward without slowing down.
Like the character, there were many settings in this book. The main setting would be the bar, but you have very little time before another story starts. The stories the regulars tell are from different locations and time eras. There are very science fiction things written into this that, as a reader, you can forget until something futuristic comes along.
This was an interesting book. There were some stories I was like “what am I reading” but after I trudged along and kept reading, my interest still held. If you like humor and multiple stories, then this is the book for you.
*I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book, and this is my honest opinion.
You can find this and other reviews on my website:
https://www.charliadamswriter.com
literary_lioness's review
dark
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.0
“You don’t know me… but we’re cousins.” These words brought Harold to a bar where, apparently, he is not the only one to hear these words. After agreeing to buy drinks for the fellow patrons, he quickly learns of the “curse” associated with a simple phone call.
An anthology of five science fiction stories, Zeb Haradon’s Cousin Calls is a trip, to say the least. Beginning with a very disturbing chili recipe, to a bathroom smeared with feces, and ending with a psychedelic visit, this book is not for the faint of heart. Add in the vulgar language combined with several lewd sexual acts and a 3 out of 5 stars is substantial.
Yet, one cannot help to praise Zeb. His out of the box thinking and wild imagination makes for a very interesting read. Taking real world experiences, Zeb twists the issues we all face and creates an otherworldly venture.
A mind-bending story filled with satire, obscenity, and ridicule Zeb Haradon’s Cousin Calls is extraordinary.
Please read with caution if any of the following may cause you distress: smoking, drinking, drug use, scam, pandemic, strippers, depression, deceit, PTSD, eviction, abuse, racism, narcissism, heart attack, arrest, incarceration, addiction, rapists, gun violence, paranoia, shop lifting, murder, bigotry, slavery, termination, garnished wages, unemployment, prosthetics, anxiety, memory loss, black lung disease, divorce, mania, chronic illness, STI, STD, seizure, brain tumor, comatose, hallucinations, sabotage, Nazis, migraines, pornography.
Thank you to #CousinCalls, and #ZebHaradon, for the opportunity to read this book and give my honest review.
Original Post found at: https://www.literarylioness.net/post/cousin-calls-review
ojasjain118's review against another edition
3.0
When the author approached me to read this book, I was unsure why I should pick it. However, the blurb promised a fantastic plot, so I bought it right away. The author impresses me with his writing style. The storyline is unquestionably distinct and creative, and it is presented in such a way that it piques your interest in the upcoming twists and turns, trapping you to keep reading.
Harold gets a call from an unknown cousin telling him to meet at the Coffin Bar, where he encounters a group of people who warn him this call foretells of future misfortune. Annie reveals to him that her cousin promises to disclose the family recipe of chili to her, but it turns out to be the worst nightmare of her life. Ward, a desperate job seeker, installs something that aids his learning, but it malfunctions his brain and causes him to be attracted to the shadows. Gordon was persuaded by his cousin to solve the mystery of the local store bathroom. A deer, Alex fighting with his cousin Mortimer, meets his end. Jane's story takes place in the midst of the COVID crisis and pre-election upheaval. Harold has not yet changed his mind about this being just a tale and is still waiting for his cousin to arrive.
The beginning of this book is quite interesting, even engaging. I was interested to see where the story was heading. I'm intrigued by Annie's story, but the ending is not what I expected. Ward's life circumstances are different and unique. However, the way he reacts to them unsettles me. And the third Gordon story is too hard for me to read; it is so gross that it took me two days to finish it. Alex's tale is heartbreaking, and it eventually becomes true, even genuine. Last comes Jane's, with which I felt the most connected, and I enjoyed how the author highlighted the problems of COVID that everyone encounters at some point, although this story is pretty long. It also contains some facts that Trump supporters may find hard to read and hate Jane for it.
I seek in every story the purpose and the solution, and both are lacking in this book. The stories are narrative throughout the book, but what is the point of telling them? Everyone is dealing with the same problem. Some manage to escape, while others remain trapped. There is no way for this problem to be solved. There isn't even an emotional message that makes me want to conclude it on a positive note. Harold's narrative, which ties to every other story, ends with a cliffhanger and no means to find out the truth behind all the other stories.
All in all, Cousin Calls is engaging with its fresh and unique storyline from start to finish. I am a risky reader. If you are also then, pick this book for its literary fiction and a touch of Sci-Fi.
Full Review on OJ Redas
Harold gets a call from an unknown cousin telling him to meet at the Coffin Bar, where he encounters a group of people who warn him this call foretells of future misfortune. Annie reveals to him that her cousin promises to disclose the family recipe of chili to her, but it turns out to be the worst nightmare of her life. Ward, a desperate job seeker, installs something that aids his learning, but it malfunctions his brain and causes him to be attracted to the shadows. Gordon was persuaded by his cousin to solve the mystery of the local store bathroom. A deer, Alex fighting with his cousin Mortimer, meets his end. Jane's story takes place in the midst of the COVID crisis and pre-election upheaval. Harold has not yet changed his mind about this being just a tale and is still waiting for his cousin to arrive.
The beginning of this book is quite interesting, even engaging. I was interested to see where the story was heading. I'm intrigued by Annie's story, but the ending is not what I expected. Ward's life circumstances are different and unique. However, the way he reacts to them unsettles me. And the third Gordon story is too hard for me to read; it is so gross that it took me two days to finish it. Alex's tale is heartbreaking, and it eventually becomes true, even genuine. Last comes Jane's, with which I felt the most connected, and I enjoyed how the author highlighted the problems of COVID that everyone encounters at some point, although this story is pretty long. It also contains some facts that Trump supporters may find hard to read and hate Jane for it.
I seek in every story the purpose and the solution, and both are lacking in this book. The stories are narrative throughout the book, but what is the point of telling them? Everyone is dealing with the same problem. Some manage to escape, while others remain trapped. There is no way for this problem to be solved. There isn't even an emotional message that makes me want to conclude it on a positive note. Harold's narrative, which ties to every other story, ends with a cliffhanger and no means to find out the truth behind all the other stories.
All in all, Cousin Calls is engaging with its fresh and unique storyline from start to finish. I am a risky reader. If you are also then, pick this book for its literary fiction and a touch of Sci-Fi.
Full Review on OJ Redas
cbramblings's review against another edition
4.0
I'm not a huge fan of anthologies for the most part. I always find the stories too short and a bit rushed. But as with most things in life there's always the exception to that rule.
This book was one of those exceptions, first the stories felt interconnected by even the small detail of a Cousin's Call..
Secondly the narrative was so playfully creepy that I was flipping the pages one after the other and let me tell you I was surprised as heck to be reading the story of a deer (an actual deer) and enjoying the heck out of it.
The stories are bittersweet and humane, but also perversely creepy.. I might not be making a whole lot of sense but this was an experience..
What I'm not a huge fan of it's the art style on the cover but I must admit that it goes well with the atmosphere of the book.
This book was one of those exceptions, first the stories felt interconnected by even the small detail of a Cousin's Call..
Secondly the narrative was so playfully creepy that I was flipping the pages one after the other and let me tell you I was surprised as heck to be reading the story of a deer (an actual deer) and enjoying the heck out of it.
The stories are bittersweet and humane, but also perversely creepy.. I might not be making a whole lot of sense but this was an experience..
What I'm not a huge fan of it's the art style on the cover but I must admit that it goes well with the atmosphere of the book.
alanadcr's review against another edition
adventurous
dark
emotional
fast-paced
1.5
A collection of short stories linked together by the overarching "Cousin Call" that haunts each of the storytellers. I really love this idea, but most of the stories just didn't click for me. I'll write a couple notes on each of the short stories below. I didn't find any of the characters likeable or redeemable. Honestly, that is usually a deal breaker for me.
World's Greatest Chili -
The Shadow Thief - Somehow I forgot going into this story that the MC was going to end up sexually attracted to shadows and I was seriously confused by the sudden shift. I was really enjoying the first half of the story but then all that work to build up the company's shady practices was tossed to the side for a shadow jacking obsession.
The Mysterious Case of Who Was Wiping Shit All Over the Bathroom Walls - Oddly enough, this title for the story says it all. This was my favorite story out of the collection but, unfortunately, it was the shortest. It was an outrageous, somewhat filthy, tale that stood out in this collection. On it's own it would have had 3 stars.
The Lucky Bucks - I'm not one for animal POVs, so right out of the gate I was annoyed. It was fine, I suppose.
The True Story of Douchebag Dave - I can't decide if this story was the one I dislike the most, or if it was the Chili story. Probably this one because it is the one I have the strongest opinion on. The story of Douchebag Dave is a contemporary tale set in the early days of the pandemic told through the diary of a single mother. Readers are forced to fast-forward through "highlights" of the early COVID and the final days of the Trump Presidency. Jane is in the running for least likeable character this year and honestly I think she will win. This story was essentially one giant rant against current events, ADHD medication, and I guess the establishment as a whole. I'm not going to spend any more of my time hashing it out.
Ultimately, it is clear that Haradon is a talented writer but this was largely a miss for me. In fact, every time I see this book on my read list I feel irritated. So if nothing else, it certainly wasn't forgettable.
*I voluntarily read and reviewed a copy provided by the author. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
World's Greatest Chili -
The Shadow Thief - Somehow I forgot going into this story that the MC was going to end up sexually attracted to shadows and I was seriously confused by the sudden shift. I was really enjoying the first half of the story but then all that work to build up the company's shady practices was tossed to the side for a shadow jacking obsession.
The Mysterious Case of Who Was Wiping Shit All Over the Bathroom Walls - Oddly enough, this title for the story says it all. This was my favorite story out of the collection but, unfortunately, it was the shortest. It was an outrageous, somewhat filthy, tale that stood out in this collection. On it's own it would have had 3 stars.
The Lucky Bucks - I'm not one for animal POVs, so right out of the gate I was annoyed. It was fine, I suppose.
The True Story of Douchebag Dave - I can't decide if this story was the one I dislike the most, or if it was the Chili story. Probably this one because it is the one I have the strongest opinion on. The story of Douchebag Dave is a contemporary tale set in the early days of the pandemic told through the diary of a single mother. Readers are forced to fast-forward through "highlights" of the early COVID and the final days of the Trump Presidency. Jane is in the running for least likeable character this year and honestly I think she will win. This story was essentially one giant rant against current events, ADHD medication, and I guess the establishment as a whole. I'm not going to spend any more of my time hashing it out.
Ultimately, it is clear that Haradon is a talented writer but this was largely a miss for me. In fact, every time I see this book on my read list I feel irritated. So if nothing else, it certainly wasn't forgettable.
*I voluntarily read and reviewed a copy provided by the author. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
chymerra's review against another edition
adventurous
dark
emotional
funny
mysterious
reflective
fast-paced
4.0
When I was approached to review this book, I was on the fence about reading it. I wouldn’t say I like reviewing anthologies. I find it hard to do with the number of stories in the book. But, the blurb called to me on this, and it was the blurb that ultimately convinced me to read Cousin Calls.
Each of the stories in Cousin Calls was fast-paced and well written. The only lag I found was during Alex’s story (which would be about the middle of the book), which didn’t throw me off the book.
I enjoyed reading Cousin Calls. The author’s wit shone throughout the book. I outright laughed during certain parts of the book; it was that good.
Since this is an anthology, I will give you all a brief description of each story. Each story is connected because it starts with a call from a cousin that each storyteller didn’t know about.
World’s Greatest Chili (Annie’s story):
I laughed while reading this story. Annie is a stripper/college student who is supporting her wanna-be poet boyfriend, Gaelen. She gets a call at work from a man claiming to be her cousin. Her cousin wants her to go to Texas, eat some chili, and get a scholarship to help with college. It sounds good to Annie, and she agrees to go. But Gaelen takes some convincing. But, not all is what it seems, and Annie is in for a big shock when she realizes what goes into the chili.
I was a bit disturbed reading World’s Greatest Chili. Annie seemed very needy and was making excuses for Gaelen left and right. Gaelen knew that, and he could manipulate Annie into doing whatever he wanted. But once Annie accepted the invite and filled out the paperwork for the scholarship, I started to see a different side of her. She wasn’t as needy (I cheered when she kept putting Gaelen in his place), and she knew that going to Texas would be life-changing. And oh boy, was it. All I have to say is that I will not look at chili the same way again.
The Shadow Thief (Ward’s story)
I will admit, The Shadow Thief was a little weird, and I handle weird pretty well.
Ward is down on his luck and at the end of his rope when he receives his cousin’s call. His long-lost cousin works for an organization called WHA, and they are hiring. Ward says he’ll apply. The only thing, though, is that Ward doesn’t have any background in anything. Knowing this, Ward opts to get an implant in his head that will allow him to learn things quickly. But there was a side effect to the implant. One that Ward didn’t expect or want.
Like I said above, The Shadow Thief was a little weird and was probably my least favorite out of the five books. I did find the thought of implants to help with your long-term memory fascinating, but I wouldn’t say I liked the side effects. I was a little disgusted by the end of the story.
The Mysterious Case of Who was Wiping Sh*t All Over the Bathroom Walls (Gordon’s story):
This story was gross and funny at the same time. Gordon is a PI hired by a well-to-do convenience store owner to find out who or what is wiping sh*t in his locked bathroom. Gordon is intrigued and sets up surveillance. What he finds out shocks him to the core.
As I stated above, this story is gross. I mean, wiping sh*t on bathroom walls. I gagged reading those scenes. But man, was it worth it. The end of this story was something I wasn’t expecting. I was shocked by who the sh*t wiper was and why that person was doing it.
The Lucky Bucks (Alex’s story):
The Lucky Bucks was a sad story. I went through a Poe phase in high school, and this story strongly reminds me of it.
The Lucky Bucks is the story of Alex. Alex is a whitetail deer who is experiencing his first mating season. As with the other stories, Alex’s long-lost cousin, Mortimer, decides to bellow at him from across a field. That sets off an epic fight for territory that ends with Mortimer and Alex locked at the antlers. Mortimer dies and is eaten by coyotes, with his head hanging off Alex’s antlers. What happens after is genuinely saddening. All I could think is “poor Alex.”
I didn’t think I would like a story told from the perspective of a deer, but it was interesting. The author was able to weave his wit and sarcasm through this story. I wasn’t a huge fan of the end, but I am a realist also.
The True Story of Douchebag Dave (Jane’s story):
Before I get into this story, I warn you that this story can be triggering. It follows the 2020 election and the pandemic from day 1. The main character, Jane, is very abrasive and I didn’t like her. But, just because I didn’t like her didn’t mean that I didn’t like the story. Oh, and if you are a Trumper, I highly recommend not reading this story. Jane hates Trump with a passion and is very, um, vocal about it. That did not offend me (I am not a fan of his), but there are still people who are.
Jane got a call from her long-lost cousin, and he had an interesting proposition. He was moving out of his apartment and wanted to know if she would rent it once he was done moving. She jumped at the chance and moved in with her son. Jane soon finds out that her downstairs neighbor is a bigot doing his damndest to get her evicted. When the pandemic hits, Jane is stuck in a hostile environment and is slowly losing it. Factoring in the 2020 Presidental election and Jane’s hatred for Trump, her world spins out of control. What happened next was unexpected. What happened? What did Jane do?
All of these stories made for an interesting read. Intertwined in between these stories was Harold sitting at the Coffin Bar listening to them and waiting for his mysterious cousin to appear.
I would recommend Cousin Calls to anyone over the age of 21. There is language, violence, and gore.