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torrie_reads's review
5.0
Thoughts
This was a really great memoir! I loved her vulnerability.
Throughout the memoir the author discusses how white supremacy has harmed her but how it has also affected her, her thoughts, and actions.
This was so well paced and written that I had a hard time putting it down. I was doing a buddy read and having a hard time sticking to the schedule because I just wanted to keep listening.
This is a raw and unflinching look at growing up Asian in the United States.
This was a really great memoir! I loved her vulnerability.
Throughout the memoir the author discusses how white supremacy has harmed her but how it has also affected her, her thoughts, and actions.
This was so well paced and written that I had a hard time putting it down. I was doing a buddy read and having a hard time sticking to the schedule because I just wanted to keep listening.
This is a raw and unflinching look at growing up Asian in the United States.
zemily83's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Colonisation, Violence, and Classism
Minor: Suicide, Gun violence, Pandemic/Epidemic, and Murder
theythemsam's review
3.75
I really liked how Lee highlighted Black authors like Kiera Laymon and Jamaica Kincaid to inform the research she’s done on the topics she’s mentioned. I also liked hearing her perspective of living in LA in the 90s as a Korean American during the summer race riots and how that, among other incidents between Koreans and America led her to delve deeper into the work she’s done so far. Good book overall.
melisahebe's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.75
bloop's review
5.0
This book was everything I wanted it to be and more. At first, I found myself rolling my eyes at Julia Lee's complaints whilst at Princeton. As someone who had always dreamed of going to these elite institutions as a high schooler (Yale was my dream Ivy but I got waitlisted), I was scoffing at how ungrateful Lee sounded for shit talking a place that I somehow deluded myself into thinking was a space that was inclusive for all those who had the merit to get in. But after putting my biases aside, I was able to absorb Lee's words more effectively and truly understand that there was little to do with merit for these institutions and all to do with luck, legacy, and proximity to whiteness. One of my favorite things that Lee does while dissecting the complicated systems that uphold white supremacy in America was the constant references to BIPOC (specifically black) historians and authors in her writing. You can really tell that she did her research while simultaneously being conscious of her place in the conversation. I definitely want to buy a hard copy of this book because I listened to it on audiobook and didn't fully take in some of the things she was saying. There were definitely some lines that floored me, especially when she was talking about her own experiences and started crying while narrating the book. I didn't expect this book to be so thorough and nuanced, as I feel like I haven't read many books relating to the "social justice" zeitgeist of the 2010s and 2020s that explore these kinds of topics in depth like Lee does. I particularly resonated with her reference to W.E.B. Du Bois and the double consciousness. I need to meet her!!!
lingfish7's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
📖🎧Can I just say how I need to make it my life goal to read more Asian memoirs? As a mixed race Asian American I’ve always felt so weird about identifying with any particular race. Furthermore, since my dad has fully assimilated to white culture, I feel disconnected. Reading memoirs like these make me feel less alone. It turns out there are a lot of Asian Americans who feel this way. The author says she perpetually feels “not Korean enough” and “not white/American enough” for either culture - and her parents were both Korean immigrants.
What impressed me about this memoir was how seamlessly Julia combined essays on race alongside her authentic and vulnerable memoir. She didn’t just write about her life, she wrote about why her life was different because of the double consciousness of how people perceived her “Asianess” and all the nuances of being seen as Asian in the U.S.
My favorite quote from the book is when she compares James Baldwin’s quote “To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a state of rage almost all of the time.” to the Asian experience in which she says, “I would argue that to be an Asian person in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a state of shame almost all of the time.” (Pg. 115)
This book reminded me a lot of the book Minor Feelings, and Julia even quoted from that book a handful of times. There were so many good nuggets to chew on in this book. So many people dismiss racism against Asians because of the model minority myth. But to uphold that myth is to become a burnt out, suicidal, “perfect” Asian who is never really authentic to themselves or to others. Julia mentioned the high suicide rate among Asian American students who strive so hard to be perfect in the white gaze but can never reach the impossible standard, because white supremacy doesn’t allow it to be reached.
“In the words of actor Steven Yeun, ‘The Asian American experience is what it’s like when you’re thinking about everyone else, but nobody else is thinking about you.’ Asian Americans operate from a position of existential invisibility… Nobody notices when you’re there, and nobody notices when you’re gone.” (Pg. 180)
My last favorite quote is in the chapter where she is talking about moving away from binary thinking and towards “both/and” thinking. “I was both white adjacent and racially othered; a person of color and someone excluded from that category; racially privileged and also disadvantaged. What this also meant is that I had an ability - a curse, but also a gift - to slip into different spaces.” (Pg. 182)
This book made for an excellent buddy read with my friend Torrie. We loved discussing all the ways this book made us critically think about both Julia’s life and the Asian American diaspora. I recommend this as an excellent AAPI book for this month!
Just a note: I did a mix of the audiobook and hardcover. I didn’t particularly love the cadence of the author’s narration voice and preferred the hardcopy over the audiobook. The hardcopy also allowed me to let the words soak in more and I highlighted my favorite parts.
What impressed me about this memoir was how seamlessly Julia combined essays on race alongside her authentic and vulnerable memoir. She didn’t just write about her life, she wrote about why her life was different because of the double consciousness of how people perceived her “Asianess” and all the nuances of being seen as Asian in the U.S.
My favorite quote from the book is when she compares James Baldwin’s quote “To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a state of rage almost all of the time.” to the Asian experience in which she says, “I would argue that to be an Asian person in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a state of shame almost all of the time.” (Pg. 115)
This book reminded me a lot of the book Minor Feelings, and Julia even quoted from that book a handful of times. There were so many good nuggets to chew on in this book. So many people dismiss racism against Asians because of the model minority myth. But to uphold that myth is to become a burnt out, suicidal, “perfect” Asian who is never really authentic to themselves or to others. Julia mentioned the high suicide rate among Asian American students who strive so hard to be perfect in the white gaze but can never reach the impossible standard, because white supremacy doesn’t allow it to be reached.
“In the words of actor Steven Yeun, ‘The Asian American experience is what it’s like when you’re thinking about everyone else, but nobody else is thinking about you.’ Asian Americans operate from a position of existential invisibility… Nobody notices when you’re there, and nobody notices when you’re gone.” (Pg. 180)
My last favorite quote is in the chapter where she is talking about moving away from binary thinking and towards “both/and” thinking. “I was both white adjacent and racially othered; a person of color and someone excluded from that category; racially privileged and also disadvantaged. What this also meant is that I had an ability - a curse, but also a gift - to slip into different spaces.” (Pg. 182)
This book made for an excellent buddy read with my friend Torrie. We loved discussing all the ways this book made us critically think about both Julia’s life and the Asian American diaspora. I recommend this as an excellent AAPI book for this month!
Just a note: I did a mix of the audiobook and hardcover. I didn’t particularly love the cadence of the author’s narration voice and preferred the hardcopy over the audiobook. The hardcopy also allowed me to let the words soak in more and I highlighted my favorite parts.