Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Disorientation by Elaine Hsieh Chou

46 reviews

laurakfinnegan's review

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funny reflective tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5


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caroisreading's review

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adventurous funny lighthearted slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

This was a fun satirical read about the absurd world of academia, and an absolutely scathing look at racism, sexism, and finding identity as a first-generation Asian woman in America. 

Ingrid is a Taiwanese-American grad student at a Harvard-like university, struggling to finish her dissertation on the works of Chinese-American poet Xiao-Wen Chou. She relies on an addiction to allergy meds to get through her anxiety and procrastination, and feels strongly this isn't the work she should be doing. Right away, we are introduced to scenes of her taking a backseat to white men, including her own fiancé, on topics about her own culture. The plot continues in a feverish nightmare, as Ingrid is shaken by the truth of her work, and realization of the incredibly racist world she's tried to function in. 

Admittedly, I couldn't get into Elaine Hsieh Chou's writing style, but appreciated her funny storytelling, and extremely unlikeable characters. The author unlocked a lot of my own trauma, with anecdotes about trying to fit in with white friends, being ashamed of our own culture, the incessant need to question if someone is interested in us because they have a fetish. A lot of these themes are told in a continuous loop that could've been edited down, but I totally get the need to expand on topics that aren't represented enough. After reading R. F. Kuang's "Yellowface," with a white character faking Asian identity and struggling to find fault with what she's doing, "Disorientation"
similarly plays out this plot, but with an Asian protagonist's churning shock and disenchantment witnessing what's happening
; I'd highly recommend reading both in succession, for these two perspectives.

Give this a read if you're interested in Asian American themes, funny stories on grad school life, and whimsical sleuth-style storytelling.

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haave's review

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funny informative lighthearted reflective tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0


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slimyfan's review

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emotional funny reflective tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

I really enjoyed reading this: a protagonist that makes you cringe as much as you root for her. No character is spared the ruthless blade of the Hsieh Chou's satire, which though sometimes a little on the nose, is funny enough to balance the mounting stress I felt as the mystery unfolded. It attempts to cover a huge range of themes, and doesn't in my opinion land on any particular side, which I consider a strength - the trappings and realistic difficulty of navigating the world as a person vulnerable to those who are systematically privileged. My favourite parts were those that dealt with the struggles between truth and narrative.

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bootsmom3's review

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challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative lighthearted mysterious tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0


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e28rika's review against another edition

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funny reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0


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kathshiroma's review against another edition

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  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5


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gomhearts's review

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challenging dark emotional funny informative reflective tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

this book provoked me so much. everything about it was so ... destructive (in both good and bad ways). at multiple points i had to stop reading just to take a breath... from either how terrified i was of the next page, trying to process what happened, or just to pace myself to enjoy the book more. (i failed -- i binged more than 200 pages within a night when i promised i'd go to bed early).

at first, i thought i knew what the book would be about: ingrid coming to terms with her asian identity and the internal racism she harbored in her childhood would manifest into her phd dissertation while researching poet xiao-wen chou. 

oh my god i was so wrong.

i started to make hypotheses of what would happen next and each time i was debunked. i was in awe  by how the book made you feel defenseless. as someone well-versed in the asian-american diaspora and reading about someone who was just so... anti-asian-american, i felt so frustrated with ingrid but wouldn't put the book down since i was determined to see it through that she changes in the end.
did she change?

i don't really know. and i think she's lying to us all.

it irks me to know that she doesn't divulge into academia again. it sucks that the white man wins. there's even a quote vivan says to her regarding how xiao-wen chou writes chinese poetry to benefit the white community.  there's no justice for the dissertation riot. god knows i'm so happy that ingrid is foregoing her dating life but it sucks to hear that her asianness in the end depended on removing a white man from her life (WHICH IS GOOD - i never had good vibes about stephen in the first place, but her speech, as tiktok-drama-infused as it is, was only concocted through a 10-minute manipulation quiz?? seriously?) by accepting that she shouldn't date more white men, does she truly understand her belongingness in america? like come on even at the end, she gets placed on asian tour groups "always" she might add. and not to mention: john smith coming to her at the end? how could she forgive him in the first place? after his storytelling, i starting ripping my hair out in utter shock and blatant racism and ingrid, as an asian american (who may honestly be a placeholder for a white woman), forgives him immediately, even working with him in the process.


the book is satirical. it's so hyperbolic i can't even tell what's meant to be taken seriously. are we supposed to take the poc caucus protest seriously? what about her saviorism when it comes to timothy - and why didn't she do anything about it in the first place? is michael supposed to stand in as a metaphor for asian-using-online-propaganda-brain-rot? and how about alex's detachment from the blond, white woman who he only viewed as a symbol for sex. yet another glorification of the white woman as she can come and go as she pleases. vivian was maybe the most authentic character yet. i never hated her. i actually think i may have hated ingrid even though i understood what she was going through.

as i was writing this review, i went from believing this book hailed a 5-star rating to a 3.75. and i wanted to talk about that. from a book that i believe is supposed to speak about asian-american model minority myths and how these stereotypes are perpetuated in modern life, the exaggeration from Vivian's broadcast to Michael's sinophilic rant to John Smith's puppet-playing facade... felt almost backfiring to me.

i cried a lot during this book. and at its peak, i recognize that it's GREAT fiction. very well-written, humorous when needed, personal, and do touch on many aspects of an asian-american's upbringing. however, the feeling i get after reading is synonymous to dread and confusion. what do i feel about ingrid? should i be happy for her? because honestly i'm not. about eunice? about stephen's performative activism? (not to mention, but hello - why was it never addressed that he keeps those raunchy photos AND the recent search history??? ingrid, why didn't you go for it???) anyways.

after reflection, this book gets a 5 in its provocation. but in the aftermath of how i feel, i have to go to a 3.75 for it (with sadness).

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oceanelle's review against another edition

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challenging hopeful informative inspiring reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

Voicey, fresh, important. In some ways, Ingrid, the protagonist, reads like if you just let all your intrusive thoughts win, which I loved deeply. And in other ways, that unhingedness always teeters on the side of painfully real. I’m going to be thinking about this book all year, what an excellent way to start off my 2024 reading. 

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abbie_'s review against another edition

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dark emotional funny reflective medium-paced

5.0

Don’t you love it when you have high expectations for a book and not only are they met but exceeded?? Disorientation is without a doubt my favourite book of 2023. I usually read quite short books, so 400+ pages is a fair amount for me, but I could have read another 400 pages of these characters! This book is so perfectly paced, there’s not a single section that feels drawn out or rushed. The character development feels believable (and sometimes scary) even though I believe it’s classed as satire, and I loved Ingrid and Eunice!

It centres around Ingrid, a Taiwanese-American PhD student in her eighth year, who finds herself somehow studying a Chinese-American poet she initially had no interest in. When she uncovers something strange in the archive one day, she sets off a chain of events that nobody could have predicted, unleashing chaos at her university which unwittingly leads to the start of a thinly veiled white nationalist movement. Believe me, it’s a wild ride, both horrifying and hilarious, as Chou’s wit is unrelenting. 

Disorientation tackles everything from fetishisation, racism in academia, identity politics, interracial relationships, parent-child relationships, and everything slots into the story so seamlessly. Ingrid’s journey felt realistic in that she doesn’t unlearn all of her internal biases in one fell swoop - it’s halting and messy, she has a lot to learn and unlearn, and I feel like Chou portrays her development incredibly. She made me feel so many emotions for all these characters - disgust, rage, irritation, pride, the unbearable urge to punch Stephen in the mouth. Truly a rollercoaster, my jaw literally dropped several times throughout the book. 

Never boring, often shocking, almost always true to real life even with its exaggerations. Loved it so very much!!

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