Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Under the Udala Trees by Chinelo Okparanta

10 reviews

anansi_tales's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.75

Parts of this book are spectacular, amazing use of dreams both culturally and for plot. You genuinely root for the main character, and continuously feel for her. That being said there are parts of this book I wish the author focused more on and I do think the pacing of book in places drags. All things considered if a sequel or spin off for a side character was made, I would read it in a heart beat.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Hate crime, Lesbophobia, Rape, Sexism, Homophobia, Abandonment, Death of parent, Grief, Miscarriage, Infertility, Injury/Injury detail, Sexual content, War, Pregnancy, Toxic relationship, and Misogyny

oliii_24's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Lesbophobia, Toxic relationship, Grief, and Religious bigotry

Moderate: Emotional abuse, Blood, War, Suicide, Sexual violence, Domestic abuse, Death of parent, and Suicidal thoughts

Minor: Car accident, Hate crime, Sexism, and Blood

missionreport's review against another edition

challenging emotional informative inspiring medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Toxic relationship, Lesbophobia, Sexism, Misogyny, Pregnancy, and Sexual harassment

gigireadswithkiki's review against another edition

challenging emotional informative fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? No

3.25

I really enjoyed that this was a book that highlighted the interplay between religious bigotry and the LGBTQ community in a non-Western society. Ijeoma was a fantastic and relatable character, constantly torn between staying true to herself and the influences of her religious-propaganda-filled upbringing. 

I wish this book had focused a little more on the Nigerian Civil War, a event in history that was very new to me, but I also understand that this book told the story of the war from the lens of a girl who was growing up in the midst of its events. My only big complaint is that her mother

never faced any consequences for being a religious bigot and all-round awful person. Plus that Ijeoma never really reflects on her internalized homophobia as a result of her religious upbringing

 

Otherwise, I found Chinelo Okparanta's writing style easy to follow, and the story was captivating enough to propel me through the book. For those looking to read this book, I will warn that there are several unsavory topics discussed within and I would check out the content warnings prior to reading!

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Outing, Homophobia, Lesbophobia, Rape, Sexual content, Religious bigotry, Emotional abuse, and Sexual assault

Moderate: Suicide attempt, Toxic relationship, Child abuse, Miscarriage, and Pregnancy

Minor: Violence, War, and Death of parent

sarahrosea's review against another edition

emotional reflective sad medium-paced

• Strong character development? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death of parent, Mass/school shootings, Homophobia, Hate crime, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Sexism, and Violence

Moderate: Domestic abuse, Outing, Pregnancy, Toxic relationship, Sexual assault, Emotional abuse, Grief, Miscarriage, Rape, Sexual violence, Lesbophobia, and Suicide

Minor: Child death

leweylibrary's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Truly such a powerful and beautifully written book

Quotes

• "I'm looking for my mother," A small voice now came crying, distinct from all the rest, a girl's, 4 or 5 years old. Something Mama used to say: If you were looking for something, chances are you will find it in the last place you think to look. I wondered if the girl would find her mother in the graveyard. (15)
• And as for eggs, they were a thing like peace of mind, like calm, even like a smile. They were a thing we had begun to have only once in a while. (22)
• Why was it that these questions never came up at church? Why was it that people never asked any questions at church? Instead, everyone nodded, and cried "Amen" after everything father Godfrey said, and clapped, no one asking him to explain anything... I wondered what father God free would say if I can fronted him with these questions. Would he even know the answers? How much did pastors pretend to know? (81)
• Her grasp was tight, painfully even. Loosen up, I imagine saying to her, to her fingers. Loosen up. And I imagine the reply something like this: This is anger. It does as it pleases. (129)
• If you set off on a witch hunt, you will find a witch. When you find her, she will be dressed like any other person. But to you, her skin will glow and stripes of white and black. You will see her broom, and you will hear her witch cry, and you will feel the effects of her spells on you. No matter how unlike a which she is, there she will be, a witch, before your eyes. (196)
• "My point is that business is the reason for things like doctrines. Business is the reason for words like 'abomination.' bottom line is, take your abomination with a grain of salt. My sense of it is that some things are called abominations that really aren't." (232)
• I suppose it's the way we are, humans that we are. Always finding it easier to make ourselves the victim in someone else's tragedy. Though it is true, too, that sometimes it is hard to know to whom the tragedy really belongs. (320)

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Miscarriage, Homophobia, Hate crime, Murder, Religious bigotry, Toxic relationship, and Pregnancy

narbine's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Religious bigotry, Hate crime, Torture, War, Toxic relationship, and Homophobia

Moderate: Death, Lesbophobia, Violence, Death of parent, Outing, Fire/Fire injury, and Grief

Minor: Miscarriage and Pregnancy

stellenelcielo's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

Undoubtedly, it took me awhile to get into this book, but once I did, I definitely enjoyed it.

However, it was a difficult read.

Trigger warning for intense homophobia, religious trauma, and marital rape. 

For those reasons, it was a hard to read, and at some points upsetting, especially if you (like me) are apart of the LGBTQ+ community.

Other than that, I could not recommend this enough, it is beautifully written, and it’s a valuable perception into queer life in places other than the West. It’s so easy to become engrossed in the way our own struggles and acceptances are here, that we don’t consider how they are elsewhere.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, War, Lesbophobia, Homophobia, Murder, Rape, and Religious bigotry

Moderate: Death of parent, Grief, and Pregnancy

Minor: War, Vomit, Toxic relationship, and Sexism

gm_vak's review against another edition

challenging dark reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Blood, Child abuse, Death, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Gore, Hate crime, Homophobia, Infidelity, Lesbophobia, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Murder, Outing, Pregnancy, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexism, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Violence, and War

enbylibrary's review against another edition

challenging emotional sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Rape, Toxic relationship, Death of parent, Grief, and Sexism

Moderate: Death and Xenophobia