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wandering_canuck's review against another edition
5.0
On its face, it is the experience of a girl whose father is incarcerated for a violent crime throughout her childhood and the mother who raised her as a single parent. Oh, but it is so much more.
This searingly honest book captures the complexity of families and our relationships within them. This memoir recounts an imperfect life in an imperfect family with both kindness and honesty. Ashley speaks of her parents and grandmother with love, striking the delicate balance of treating them not as heroes nor as villains.
Ford's writing is akin to that of Roxane Gay, managing to be both poetic and accessible. Simply fabulous. I cannot give it enough stars.
Listen to the audiobook if you can; hearing the memoir in the author's voice makes it that much more convincing.
Graphic: Body shaming, Emotional abuse, Rape, Toxic relationship, Bullying, and Child abuse
hanhodge's review against another edition
4.0
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Bullying, Sexual assault, and Rape
queerghstbuster's review against another edition
5.0
Graphic: Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Domestic abuse, and Sexual violence
Moderate: Mental illness, Gaslighting, Rape, and Sexism
Minor: Bullying and Racism
radfordmanor's review against another edition
4.0
Graphic: Body shaming, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual harassment, Stalking, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Bullying, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Grief, Infidelity, Racism, Terminal illness, Toxic friendship, and Toxic relationship
valerie_elaine's review against another edition
5.0
Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, and Toxic relationship
Minor: Adult/minor relationship, Bullying, Panic attacks/disorders, and Pregnancy
patricia_epub's review against another edition
4.5
“When you write about you and me? Just tell the truth. Your truth. Don’t worry about nobody’s feelings, especially not mine. You gotta be tough to tell your truth, but it’s the only thing worth doing next to loving somebody.”
This is a pleasant, spontaneous read that I am so glad I picked up (or clicked on, rather). Ashley C. Ford is a thoughtful writer and this fact shone through the way she wrote her memoir. Her experiences were deeply emotional, scarring, and painful—but she told her story, her truth, with the careful gentleness of someone who struggled for a long time but has also started healing (and continues to heal up to this day), someone who's been learning to be kinder to their selves. She wrote with understanding of the people who shaped her, good and bad. Wrote with sobriety that I think accorded much more nuance to the tone of her memoir.
As I said in my initial impression of this book, there is just so much to unpack. The Black experience is there tied with poverty, trauma, and the universal struggles of women: sexualization of women’s bodies, rape, and assault. There is also the inescapable struggle to reconcile her trauma with her absent father, and the truth behind his absence. Her tumultuous relationship with a detached, abusive single mother. The complicated feelings she associates with a grandmother who is both her loving caregiver but also her harshest critic.
I am truly glad to have heard this story from the author herself through her wonderful narration of the audiobook.
Moderate: Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Rape, Sexual assault, and Sexual violence
Minor: Body shaming, Bullying, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Sexism, Stalking, and Toxic relationship