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emmareadstoomuch 's review for:
The Guinevere Deception
by Kiersten White
I have next to nothing to say about this book.
Well, except the fact that my reading it single-handedly doubled the global use of the Audible “back 30 seconds” button. I was so bored while listening to it that even though I was doing other things - playing Sims, cleaning, revising my world domination plans - my mind STILL wandered.
It’s that boring.
There’s no plot to be spoken of, unless you count “girl who we are supposed to think is strong and powerful and cool wandering around doing f*ck-all and being a total idiot, and also said girl has magic but she may as well be cursed into being an oak tree for all the fun we get to have seeing her use it” as a plot.
I don’t, personally.
Here’s the best comparison I can make: the majority of this book feels like when you’re playing a video game and you can’t figure out what your next step is supposed to be, so you just walk around the same places and talk to the same people over and over.
In this retelling, Guinevere is actually a magic-person sent by Merlin for the unbelievably abstract purpose of “protecting Arthur,” and until the very end we have no idea from what. Also, neither does Guinevere.
To be blunt, it is the dumbest thing in the world.
We’re supposed to buy good ol’ Guin as a badass, but considering she spends 99% of the story being scared of water and inexplicably building two sides of a love triangle, it makes no sense.
And all the characters are so charmless and FLAT.
Even thinking about this book is making me mad, so I’m going to wrap things up here.
Bottom line: A hard no from me.
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let it be known that i am interested in EVERY fairytale-y retelling that includes magic and darkness and women being the ones who actually got sh*t done.
Well, except the fact that my reading it single-handedly doubled the global use of the Audible “back 30 seconds” button. I was so bored while listening to it that even though I was doing other things - playing Sims, cleaning, revising my world domination plans - my mind STILL wandered.
It’s that boring.
There’s no plot to be spoken of, unless you count “girl who we are supposed to think is strong and powerful and cool wandering around doing f*ck-all and being a total idiot, and also said girl has magic but she may as well be cursed into being an oak tree for all the fun we get to have seeing her use it” as a plot.
I don’t, personally.
Here’s the best comparison I can make: the majority of this book feels like when you’re playing a video game and you can’t figure out what your next step is supposed to be, so you just walk around the same places and talk to the same people over and over.
In this retelling, Guinevere is actually a magic-person sent by Merlin for the unbelievably abstract purpose of “protecting Arthur,” and until the very end we have no idea from what. Also, neither does Guinevere.
To be blunt, it is the dumbest thing in the world.
We’re supposed to buy good ol’ Guin as a badass, but considering she spends 99% of the story being scared of water and inexplicably building two sides of a love triangle, it makes no sense.
And all the characters are so charmless and FLAT.
Even thinking about this book is making me mad, so I’m going to wrap things up here.
Bottom line: A hard no from me.
-------
let it be known that i am interested in EVERY fairytale-y retelling that includes magic and darkness and women being the ones who actually got sh*t done.