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A review by littlecornerreads
My Persuasion: Austen in Love Book 3 by Jenni James
1.0
The following book contains minor pop culture references and weird expressions inspired by the South
There were a couple of big misses for me here:
Mistake #1: Replacing Anne Elliot with Caroline Bingley.
Anne and Caroline are on complete opposite ends of the spectrum, so this choice confuses me. Maybe James (for whatever reason) wanted a fix-it fic for Caroline? Maybe she was trying to make Persuasion more accessible to readers by tying it in with Pride and Prejudice? I mean, I've thought about the Louisa-Louisa connection, and if you really want to capitalize on that, there are other options...
Mistake #2: Making Louisa Caroline's sister.
As desperate as "anyone between fifteen and thirty may have me for the asking" Wentworth is, there's no way he'd willingly associate with the family that caused his greatest heartache, and there's nothing you can say that'd convince me otherwise.
Mistake #3: Not including the "half-hope, half-agony" scene.
It's such an iconic scene and perfectly encapsulates the Anne-Wentworth dynamic. Instead, we get a proposal that literally ends with "just stop this female drama and marry me!"
Just stop this female drama and marry me.
I'll just let that sink in for a second.
Words every woman wants to hear, I'm sure, but that's what happens when you have your protagonists kissing by chapter 7 (so much for slowburn.) The whole book is essentially Caroline and Wentworth awkwardly dancing around each other like they're middle schoolers who like each other and it's mutual but don't do anything about it.
The writing in this volume of "Austen in Love" is especially awkward this time around. Just to give you a sense of what we're working with, this is one of the most popular highlights (by three whole readers) is the passage:
The book is set in Salt Lake City, but everyone talks like they're from the South, using expressions like "as nervous as a mouse near a rattlesnake" and "I feel guiltier than a hog caught in the vegetable garden." Oh, and let's not forget my favorite, "thank all the holy cows in the universe." There were some stylistic choices that didn't work for me, and not to turn this into an Introductory English class, but there were some missteps with some of the clauses. Also, how does her 102 fever suddenly go down after drinking soup? Does it have unicorn hair in it or something? (I know it's super minor, but I apparently I can't turn my work brain off and was super bothered by it.)
One good thing was that someone finally figured out how to recreate the steps scene without making Louisa look like a fool jumping around--well, without making her look like more of a fool than she was canonically.
There were a couple of big misses for me here:
Mistake #1: Replacing Anne Elliot with Caroline Bingley.
Anne and Caroline are on complete opposite ends of the spectrum, so this choice confuses me. Maybe James (for whatever reason) wanted a fix-it fic for Caroline? Maybe she was trying to make Persuasion more accessible to readers by tying it in with Pride and Prejudice? I mean, I've thought about the Louisa-Louisa connection, and if you really want to capitalize on that, there are other options...
Mistake #2: Making Louisa Caroline's sister.
As desperate as "anyone between fifteen and thirty may have me for the asking" Wentworth is, there's no way he'd willingly associate with the family that caused his greatest heartache, and there's nothing you can say that'd convince me otherwise.
Mistake #3: Not including the "half-hope, half-agony" scene.
It's such an iconic scene and perfectly encapsulates the Anne-Wentworth dynamic. Instead, we get a proposal that literally ends with "just stop this female drama and marry me!"
Just stop this female drama and marry me.
I'll just let that sink in for a second.
Words every woman wants to hear, I'm sure, but that's what happens when you have your protagonists kissing by chapter 7 (so much for slowburn.) The whole book is essentially Caroline and Wentworth awkwardly dancing around each other like they're middle schoolers who like each other and it's mutual but don't do anything about it.
The writing in this volume of "Austen in Love" is especially awkward this time around. Just to give you a sense of what we're working with, this is one of the most popular highlights (by three whole readers) is the passage:
He glanced over her features. Same pretty hair, same beautiful mouth, and the same dang bewitching eyes. That shade of green should be illegal. She should be forced to go around wearing sunglasses so people could go about their day without distraction.
The book is set in Salt Lake City, but everyone talks like they're from the South, using expressions like "as nervous as a mouse near a rattlesnake" and "I feel guiltier than a hog caught in the vegetable garden." Oh, and let's not forget my favorite, "thank all the holy cows in the universe." There were some stylistic choices that didn't work for me, and not to turn this into an Introductory English class, but there were some missteps with some of the clauses. Also, how does her 102 fever suddenly go down after drinking soup? Does it have unicorn hair in it or something? (I know it's super minor, but I apparently I can't turn my work brain off and was super bothered by it.)
One good thing was that someone finally figured out how to recreate the steps scene without making Louisa look like a fool jumping around--well, without making her look like more of a fool than she was canonically.