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A review by dokushoka
Return of the Mummy by R.L. Stine
2.0
It's very easy to do a "Goosebumps minus bumps" review for this book because, surprise!, nothing supernatural happened for about 90% of this book! It was mostly the (extremely annoying) protagonist overreacting to everything that happened to him and not understanding reality. Like the cops busting into the tomb and the protagonist crying that they had guns pointed at everyone, a chapter break later it turns out Scientist's partner has just returned with cops to make sure nobody else broke in and stole things.
But, Jesus, Main Character was so annoying this round. None of the Goosebumps protagonists are winners or particularly smart (what would be the fun of a novel if nobody's playing along with the scary stuff, I get that), but this guy was particularly stupid and annoying. I'm not kidding when I tell you he overreacted to everything and seemed to understand very little. So many chapter breaks were, "OMG, something terrifying happened! [Chapter start] Nope, never mind, I overreacted! The mummy isn't rising from the grave, they just opened the tomb."
But, Jesus, Main Character was so annoying this round. None of the Goosebumps protagonists are winners or particularly smart (what would be the fun of a novel if nobody's playing along with the scary stuff, I get that), but this guy was particularly stupid and annoying. I'm not kidding when I tell you he overreacted to everything and seemed to understand very little. So many chapter breaks were, "OMG, something terrifying happened! [Chapter start] Nope, never mind, I overreacted! The mummy isn't rising from the grave, they just opened the tomb."