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A review by pattydsf
How to Be Alone by Sara Maitland
3.0
"Think about it for a moment. It is truly very odd.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.