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A review by giorgiawessels
The Buddha and the Borderline: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder through Dialectical Behavior Therapy, Buddhism, and Online Dating by Kiera Van Gelder
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
3.75
I was shocked to see the book has been published in 2010 because everything is still so relevant. The author is so vulnerable and candid, which made this book a great read. You really felt like you got to experience what she feels. I was a little torn between giving it a rating of 3.75 or 4, because the book did, in my opinion, end a little abruptly and I was expecting more. Still, I really enjoyed it and would recommend giving it a read.
Here are some snippets from the book:
“On a logical level, I know that everyone feels pain. Everyone suffers. Is my pain really that much greater, or am I just weaker? Where is the line between normal and abnormal emotional suffering? I come across “The Pain of Being Borderline,” an article written by another famous BPD clinician, Dr. Zanarini. It says that in comparison to people with other personality disorders, borderlines experience greater levels of worthlessness, anger, abandonment, and hopelessness—that more than others, we feel like bad, damaged children, shunned by the world, and better off dead (Zanarini et al. 1998).”
“With BPD, we are always suffering because of impermanence. Our grasping is intense and rigid, our attachments unyielding. Impermanence is our nightmare, even as it’s the essence of life. No wonder Marsha Linehan emphasizes the principles of accepting reality (1993b). If reality is always changing, then we must not cling to it.”
“every gain involves a loss. Even though successes are seemingly the building blocks of progress, they also upset the balance, and that makes you more vulnerable.”
“Ironically, the word “borderline” has become the most perfect expression of my experience—the experience of being in two places at once: disordered and perfect.”
Here are some snippets from the book:
“On a logical level, I know that everyone feels pain. Everyone suffers. Is my pain really that much greater, or am I just weaker? Where is the line between normal and abnormal emotional suffering? I come across “The Pain of Being Borderline,” an article written by another famous BPD clinician, Dr. Zanarini. It says that in comparison to people with other personality disorders, borderlines experience greater levels of worthlessness, anger, abandonment, and hopelessness—that more than others, we feel like bad, damaged children, shunned by the world, and better off dead (Zanarini et al. 1998).”
“With BPD, we are always suffering because of impermanence. Our grasping is intense and rigid, our attachments unyielding. Impermanence is our nightmare, even as it’s the essence of life. No wonder Marsha Linehan emphasizes the principles of accepting reality (1993b). If reality is always changing, then we must not cling to it.”
“every gain involves a loss. Even though successes are seemingly the building blocks of progress, they also upset the balance, and that makes you more vulnerable.”
“Ironically, the word “borderline” has become the most perfect expression of my experience—the experience of being in two places at once: disordered and perfect.”