444massacre 's review for:

Knife: Meditations After an Attempted Murder by Salman Rushdie

1.0

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I bought this book judging by the cover and thinking it would be dark, fascinating and disturbing. Turns out it was the rumblings of an old hag who thought his health issues were interesting and the reader got to be tortured with descriptions of him trying to clean his ass with one hand and how he had trouble peeing because his prostate was growing like a basket ball from the UTI medication. It goes to show the narcissism of a writer (I won’t say a celebrity because I don’t know a single piece of his work so I guess he is not that important) thinking he is someone of interest and making his misery the central point of a novel without plot basically. The only one I empathised with was Eliza who tried to marry and secure herself financially with an old ugly man and then had to go to the Caribbean to get away from his lame ass who didn’t get killed so she could get the inheritance. I was like “gurl take care of yourself, that ho and going nowhere and he wants to be babied. Ain’t nobody got time for that” .
Psedophilosophy we have all heard before, him trying to align himself with other important events like the Charlie Hedbo event like he could compare and excusing them as drawing pictures when they were humiliating people’s religion. Please old ho, you fooling nobody.
I’m the end I believe that if he got killed and someone else wrote the book then it would be bearable, even enjoyable.