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A review by cgj13
Leave Me by Gayle Forman
5.0
I received this as an advanced reader copy from the publisher through NetGalley.
******* Review in progress. Not yet completed****
This was a page turner for me. I loved it.
The synopsis on the back cover is what drew me into this book. I have not ready any of the authors other books, but was aware of one of her books "If I Stay" was made into a movie. I only saw the previews and it looks like a heart wrencher.
Anyhow, the snippet "For every woman who has ever fantasized about driving past her exit on the highway instead of going home to make dinner, for every woman who has ever dreamed of boarding a train to a place where no one needs constant attention..." definitely caught my eye. I mean seriously, what mom doesn't sometime fantasize about a life of peace and quiet when things are harry and hectic. Most would not take that path, but in this case Maribeth does.
I thought to myself: who leaves their children?? Why don't I hate her more for doing this? For some reason I didn't hate her, but could empathize on how she ended up in that situation. I can almost identify with her. Maribeth is a harried mother, who pushes the limits of her resources/capabilities, takes on too much, doesn't ask for what is needed to have the support she needs, and then stews and gets upset when she feels she is not getting what she deserves from her husband. I think lots of relationships go that way at some point in time. Then she has a heart attack, and her world is turned upside down. She feels like she is being pushed out the door from her magazine job--an industry that is already cut throat. Her husband rushes to her side, but then acts like all is normal, a bit out of his selfish need to have the status quo maintained.
Maribeth has a complex need/want system. She wants help, but she wants it provided and in her style. She wants it to be from her husband and is irritated by the fact that he asked her mother to help. This places a lot of burden on him, and stress on her, as she believes her mother cannot do anything. Having personally faced a situation like this, I know how difficult it is to give up control of your household to someone else.
I was quite shocked when I started the second section and realized she had up and left her family. We are given the insight that in order for her to be at terms that she left her children, she compartmentalizes that aspect of her life and treats it like she is gone on a business trip. That is brought up multiple times throughout the time she is gone.
In fact, after some time, she decides to get back in touch with her ex. She is quite pissed that he has not been trying to find her or contact. His response is that he is doing what she asked. He even forwards her the letter she wrote. In an act of defiance and rage, she deletes the email, as if to say "how dare he throw my words back in my face" However, she doesn't even know what she wrote in the letter, and it remains a mystery to us, the reader, until she gains the courage to tell her husband to resend it, because she doesn't know what she wrote. I love, love, loved the dialogue between Maribeth and her husband that happens via e-mail. At first it is very terse. Her husband is responding in one word replies, which infuriates Maribeth, but eventually, they both let the walls come down, and we see some real honest discussion of their problems. (well, on a somewhat high-level, other wise the book would be way to long). This left me to feel that there was hope for a reconciliation, or at least with Maribeth returning home in the near future.
I have left out the bits about her relationships with the cardiologist and the search for her birth mother. This is intentional, as I have already wrote enough on this book.
I know it has a slight fairy tale ending with things wrapping up nicely between Maribeth and her husband. But I know that is not how it always plays out in real life, but it settled well with my heart and what I wanted for this book. I felt that the resolution between Maribeth and Elizabeth was too sugary sweet, with Elizabeth going from frigid standoff queen to doting, sweet best friend/ "auntie" to her kids. That seemed quite unrealistic to me.
After talking about this book with our children's librarian, she told me that Gayle Forman is a YA author. That makes sense for the speed of reading of this book, and the level of complexity of the relationships (or lack of complexity). I hate to say it makes for a great beach read, because I feel like it would minimize the book to something less than it is.
******* Review in progress. Not yet completed****
This was a page turner for me. I loved it.
The synopsis on the back cover is what drew me into this book. I have not ready any of the authors other books, but was aware of one of her books "If I Stay" was made into a movie. I only saw the previews and it looks like a heart wrencher.
Anyhow, the snippet "For every woman who has ever fantasized about driving past her exit on the highway instead of going home to make dinner, for every woman who has ever dreamed of boarding a train to a place where no one needs constant attention..." definitely caught my eye. I mean seriously, what mom doesn't sometime fantasize about a life of peace and quiet when things are harry and hectic. Most would not take that path, but in this case Maribeth does.
I thought to myself: who leaves their children?? Why don't I hate her more for doing this? For some reason I didn't hate her, but could empathize on how she ended up in that situation. I can almost identify with her. Maribeth is a harried mother, who pushes the limits of her resources/capabilities, takes on too much, doesn't ask for what is needed to have the support she needs, and then stews and gets upset when she feels she is not getting what she deserves from her husband. I think lots of relationships go that way at some point in time. Then she has a heart attack, and her world is turned upside down. She feels like she is being pushed out the door from her magazine job--an industry that is already cut throat. Her husband rushes to her side, but then acts like all is normal, a bit out of his selfish need to have the status quo maintained.
Maribeth has a complex need/want system. She wants help, but she wants it provided and in her style. She wants it to be from her husband and is irritated by the fact that he asked her mother to help. This places a lot of burden on him, and stress on her, as she believes her mother cannot do anything. Having personally faced a situation like this, I know how difficult it is to give up control of your household to someone else.
I was quite shocked when I started the second section and realized she had up and left her family. We are given the insight that in order for her to be at terms that she left her children, she compartmentalizes that aspect of her life and treats it like she is gone on a business trip. That is brought up multiple times throughout the time she is gone.
In fact, after some time, she decides to get back in touch with her ex. She is quite pissed that he has not been trying to find her or contact. His response is that he is doing what she asked. He even forwards her the letter she wrote. In an act of defiance and rage, she deletes the email, as if to say "how dare he throw my words back in my face" However, she doesn't even know what she wrote in the letter, and it remains a mystery to us, the reader, until she gains the courage to tell her husband to resend it, because she doesn't know what she wrote. I love, love, loved the dialogue between Maribeth and her husband that happens via e-mail. At first it is very terse. Her husband is responding in one word replies, which infuriates Maribeth, but eventually, they both let the walls come down, and we see some real honest discussion of their problems. (well, on a somewhat high-level, other wise the book would be way to long). This left me to feel that there was hope for a reconciliation, or at least with Maribeth returning home in the near future.
I have left out the bits about her relationships with the cardiologist and the search for her birth mother. This is intentional, as I have already wrote enough on this book.
I know it has a slight fairy tale ending with things wrapping up nicely between Maribeth and her husband. But I know that is not how it always plays out in real life, but it settled well with my heart and what I wanted for this book. I felt that the resolution between Maribeth and Elizabeth was too sugary sweet, with Elizabeth going from frigid standoff queen to doting, sweet best friend/ "auntie" to her kids. That seemed quite unrealistic to me.
After talking about this book with our children's librarian, she told me that Gayle Forman is a YA author. That makes sense for the speed of reading of this book, and the level of complexity of the relationships (or lack of complexity). I hate to say it makes for a great beach read, because I feel like it would minimize the book to something less than it is.