Take a photo of a barcode or cover
A review by randi_jo
Bride by Ali Hazelwood
hopeful
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
2.75
So, this was my first Ali Hazelwood book and it's probably going to be my last. I didn't hate it, but I can't say I enjoyed it much, either? I'm not very good at reading books that require me to turn my brain off and enjoy the ride, so to speak.
The start of the book was really interesting: you had the romantic plot, the missing persons subplot, the weird family ties/secrets subplot . . . it felt like it was going places. I was wrong.
There are some things that felt startlingly unfinished:
- The missing person's plotI mean Misery can't even solve it herself? She's literally kidnapped so everything can be solved without her and then info dumped on us by her UNSURPRISINGLY evil father, like the cliche villain that he is. Like bruh, why did we get a half-assed mystery plot like that.
- The idea of mates and the Vampyre equivalent of?? Likethere were the obvious beginnings of hints that Vampyres also have something like mates. Like if they continuously drink blood from the same person over and over it creates... what? A mating bond? Something like that?? Why was this not expounded upon and why was it not used as a "Hey your blood smells fabulous and everyone smells like hot garbage this must be a fucking sign". BUT NO. It is just forgotten about because fuck me I guess.
- The Loyalists like ok i get they wereused as a red herring in its MOST BASIC FORM. But like bitch please at least explain why we're supposed to be worried about these people to any kind of extent other than 'they're basically terrorists lol'. We don't even SEE any of the bad shit they do. Zero tension.
- Any fucking sentence that ended with "but". Or sentence that was just "But." If I never have to see the word "but" again, I will die happily.
And tangentially can we just address the ridiculousness of Lowe constantly worrying about his knot not.... fitting. Like to the point he'd lie to Misery's face about being mates because she doesn't have the "hardware"???? Considering a newborn's head is like, 14 inches around, and Misery is equipped with a vagina that is comparable in elasticity to a human's, unless his knot is the size of a fucking teapot, I don't understand what the hubbub was about. And even if it WERE (ridiculous), you're telling me that vaginal/anal stretching is NOT a thing? PLEASE.
The start of the book was really interesting: you had the romantic plot, the missing persons subplot, the weird family ties/secrets subplot . . . it felt like it was going places. I was wrong.
There are some things that felt startlingly unfinished:
- The missing person's plot
- The idea of mates and the Vampyre equivalent of?? Like
- The Loyalists like ok i get they were
- Any fucking sentence that ended with "but". Or sentence that was just "But." If I never have to see the word "but" again, I will die happily.
And tangentially can we just address the ridiculousness of Lowe constantly worrying about his knot not.... fitting. Like to the point he'd lie to Misery's face about being mates because she doesn't have the "hardware"???? Considering a newborn's head is like, 14 inches around, and Misery is equipped with a vagina that is comparable in elasticity to a human's, unless his knot is the size of a fucking teapot, I don't understand what the hubbub was about. And even if it WERE (ridiculous), you're telling me that vaginal/anal stretching is NOT a thing? PLEASE.