A review by lolajh
Loveless by Alice Oseman

emotional sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

I have to say that I am quite disappointed in this book. Going into it I was prepared for the very vast spectrum that is asexuality and aromanticism to be explored. Instead, a vast variety of aromantic and asexual characters were introduced, all of which were on the far end of the spectrum where they experience no attraction. The concept of asexuality and aromanticism being a spectrum is mentioned, but not at all implemented into the four aspec characters in this book. 
“Jess – she’s aromantic, meaning she doesn’t feel romantic attraction for anyone.”
Like, yes, this is definitely an example of what being aromantic can feel like for many aromantics, but it is definitely not a universal way to describe aromanticism. Just so frequently this book describes the main character Georgia’s experience with being aroace as the experience for being aromantic and asexual. The fact that it is never mentioned that she is just on the far end of the spectrum and instead just says that what she feels is the blunt of being aroace just seems so iffy.
“It turned out that lots of asexual people still wanted to have sex for all sorts of different reasons, but some felt totally neutral about it, and others – what I’d originally thought – literally despised it. Some asexual people still masturbated; others didn’t have libidos at all.
It also turned out that lots of aromantic people still wanted to be in romantic relationships, despite not feeling those feels. Others didn’t ever want a romantic partner.
And people identified as all sorts of combinations of romantic and sexual – there were gay asexuals, like Sunil, or bisexual aromantics, like Jess, or straight asexuals, pansexual aromantics, and loads more. Some asexual and aromantic people didn’t even like splitting up their attraction into two labels, and some just used the word ‘queer’ to summarise everything. There were words I had to google like ‘demisexual’ and ‘greyromantic’, but even after googling I wasn’t sure exactly what they meant. 
The aromantic and asexual spectrums weren’t just straight lines. They were radar charts with at least a dozen different axes.”
Like I could maybe forgive the exclusion of so many aspec experiences if only the absolute perfect description wasn’t in the fucking book! Like this is perfect. I cannot understand why after Georgia looks into the asexual and aromantic spectrum that she doesn’t then think of asexuality and aromanticism AS A SPECTRUM. I know Alice is aroace themself, and clearly she has done a lot of looking into asexuality and aromanticism before publishing this book to come to the conclusion that asexuality and aromanticism is a spectrum, and not at all one-size-fits-all. So the fact that Georgia, after learning of the a-spectrum, she still acts like feeling absolutely no attraction is the true aromantic and asexual experience, I just find that so problematic. 
“Aromantic is when you don’t feel romantic attraction and asexual is when you don’t feel sexual attraction.”
Like NO. Please, it is not that linear and Georgia literally researched and discovered that? 

Georgia is also clearly sex-repulsed, however that term is never once used to describe her, and instead just makes her push all her intense sex-repulsive thoughts onto other people who have and enjoy sex. She basically just shames absolutely every single mention of sex made by anyone around her. 
“People are really out there just … thinking about having sex all the time and they can’t even help it?’ I spluttered. ‘People have dreams about it because they want it that much? How the – I’m losing it. I thought all the movies were exaggerating, but you’re all really out there just craving genitals and embarrassment. This has to be some kind of huge joke.”
That is just so incredibly harmful. Full on just shaming her friends for talking about sex is making sex seem like such a taboo and disgusting thing all over again.

She even makes a comment about how talking about sex around her is “erasing her identity”. 😬 I do not care that this was a joke, that just makes the asexual community look so horrible.
“Dude,’ I said. ‘I’m the one who can’t fall in love. I think you just don’t want to.’
She made a ‘harrumph’ noise.
‘Well?’ I asked. ‘Are you aromantic?’
‘No,’ she grumbled.”
“There. So stop erasing my identity and tell Pip you like her.”

Here’s Georgia talking to her LESBIAN friend about “choosing” her sexuality: 🤗
‘Yeah. I think I’d choose to be gay if I could.’
Pip didn’t say anything for a moment, and I wondered if I’d said something weird or offensive. It was the truth, though. I would have chosen to be gay if I could.
I knew liking girls could be hard when you’re also a girl. It usually was, at least for a while. But it was beautiful too. So fucking beautiful.”
Like shut the fuck up! Lesbianism is not this “uwu cottagecore” fantasy you’re making it seem like it is. It is an incredibly marginalised community that clearly neither Georgia or the author understands.

Speaking of her lesbian friend, let’s talk about her. Pip. A butch Latina lesbian, who is extremely stereotyped as aggressive and mean, which is a very harmful portrayal of her lesbianism and her Latina identity, and is less forgiveable when the author is white and also not a lesbian. Pip is also portrayed like she is trying to “convince” Georgia she’s a lesbian because she clearly doesn’t like guys (Pip didn’t know she didn’t like girls either), and basically doing the whole “pushing sexuality onto people” thing that does not at all happen in real life, but is something the lesbian community is constantly demonised for, so pushing all these very harmful traits onto the one lesbian character is definitely not good!

Then there’s Rooney, a bi/pan stereotype, who sleeps around and has casual sex often, which would be fine if it weren’t for it being described that she does this due to her trauma in a previous relationship, and the constant shaming by Georgia, once more.

And Sunil. They are a nonbinary character immediately introduced as using he/they pronouns, yet, throughout the entire book, they/them is never ONCE used for him, not even by his best friend, and their identity is clearly not respected by Georgia either, because she only uses he/him for them as well. That’s fucking weird!

Finally, I don’t think Georgia should have been forgiven in the end. She fucking USED her best friend who was in love with her as an experiment for her sexuality and then kissed her other best friend’s crush 👍 Also why are all Alice’s aroace characters autistic-coded and lowkey emotionless beings?
Expand filter menu Content Warnings