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chriskoppenhaver 's review for:
Fangbone! Third-Grade Barbarian
by Michael Rex
Five hundred winters ago, the greatest evil that ever lived ruled over Skullbania. Venomous Drool was his name. He built an army that swept through the lands and almost wiped out the clans.
Many battles were fought, and many great warriors died to keep his evil from spreading. Finally, Drool was defeated, and cut into many small pieces. The pieces were separated and taken to different lands so that Venomous Drool could never rule again.
But since my birth, a new army of Drool worshipers has been moving through Skullbania, collecting the pieces one by one, and rebuilding Drool. The only piece they do not have is his big toe! My clan was put in charge of protecting the big toe because it is the most evil, cursed, wretched part of his body.
I was given the toe and sent into your world. Venomous Drool and his army will never find me here. He will never get his big toe back! For I am Fangbone! Protector of the Big Toe of Drool!
And that's how the new student in class 3G introduces himself--while dressed in a cape, leather boots, forearm bracers, fir kilt, horned helmet, and a sword slung across his back--after Bill adopts him as a friend. Fortunately, in 3G "everyone learns at their own speed" and individuality is accepted, so the teacher and class take Fangbone in as one of their own.
His classmates soon learn more of Fangbone's world, as mystical creatures keep popping up to attack him and steal the big toe, and Fangbone decides he will prove his mettle to the warriors back in his world by crafting them into his very own army. Of course, to earn their respect and win them to his cause, he must first help them stand up to the school bullies in the Beanball Games.
Imagine Dav Pilkey's Ook and Gluk dropped into George and Harold's school, shave a slight (just a slight) bit of silly off, and add in the tiniest amount of sincerity and heart. Most fun.
Many battles were fought, and many great warriors died to keep his evil from spreading. Finally, Drool was defeated, and cut into many small pieces. The pieces were separated and taken to different lands so that Venomous Drool could never rule again.
But since my birth, a new army of Drool worshipers has been moving through Skullbania, collecting the pieces one by one, and rebuilding Drool. The only piece they do not have is his big toe! My clan was put in charge of protecting the big toe because it is the most evil, cursed, wretched part of his body.
I was given the toe and sent into your world. Venomous Drool and his army will never find me here. He will never get his big toe back! For I am Fangbone! Protector of the Big Toe of Drool!
And that's how the new student in class 3G introduces himself--while dressed in a cape, leather boots, forearm bracers, fir kilt, horned helmet, and a sword slung across his back--after Bill adopts him as a friend. Fortunately, in 3G "everyone learns at their own speed" and individuality is accepted, so the teacher and class take Fangbone in as one of their own.
His classmates soon learn more of Fangbone's world, as mystical creatures keep popping up to attack him and steal the big toe, and Fangbone decides he will prove his mettle to the warriors back in his world by crafting them into his very own army. Of course, to earn their respect and win them to his cause, he must first help them stand up to the school bullies in the Beanball Games.
Imagine Dav Pilkey's Ook and Gluk dropped into George and Harold's school, shave a slight (just a slight) bit of silly off, and add in the tiniest amount of sincerity and heart. Most fun.