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arthur_of_camelot 's review for:
The Sin in the Steel
by Ryan Van Loan
I really, really wanted to love this book, but it suffered so much from telling instead of showing and other sloppy decisions. It opens really well in the aftermath of a shootout, yet still staying exciting with a political cat-and-mouse that did actually keep me interested. I didn't mind that at all! But it quickly went downhill from there.
Buc and Eld board a ship to go get to Plot(tm), and Eld immediately goes to look broodingly at the sea and conveniently remember his own backstory. He ends this explaino-flashback with a cliche'd like about how he didn't save Buc, Buc saved him. He had time to stand there and painstakingly think out so much of his own thoughts and past--technically, a "show" given we saw this as a flashback of an action-memory, but it only happened to tell the reader what's up with him--but he couldn't devote literally any thought whatsoever to why or HOW the hell Buc saved him? Literally, how did she?? Just by ... being there? Letting him rescue her from the streets? How did he do that? No answers for those questions though.
Buc is very seasick on the journey, but that's all entirely glossed over because we spend the whole time with Eld broodily remembering his own past. So then in the next several chapters, where Buc repeatedly thinks about how she's never been so tired or so messed up before, I genuinely had no idea what she was talking about. What on EARTH was making these few days any different from any other day in her life? Turns out it was the seasickness! I guess?? The seasickness we literally did not see AT ALL, but then suddenly after a couple of chapters on land, she finally succumbs to this fever she's had the whole time that wasn't shown or mentioned or anything other than her continually referencing how fucked up she is with zero explanation for what she's talking about.
Also, her and Eld are supposed to be so incredibly close, best friends who ~saved each other~ yet she doesn't know anything about his backstory whatsoever. They've just. Never had a conversation. I guess. It seems Eld did deliberately not talk about his past to her, but not even in a way like-- ""Buc knew Eld had deep dark secrets because he never discussed his past, but she didn't know those secrets involved mages"" (really bad made up example there) --there's no actual sense that Buc had tried to ask about his past, that he had either misled her or shut down that conversation, it just honestly seems like they've been friends for years and then one day Buc is SHOCKED to discover that he existed and had a life before knowing her. Because they've just never talked to each other at all I suppose!
I will say I did like the few parts I managed to read of Buc's neurodivergence (some sensory issues, racing thoughts, could be autistic or ADHD) that felt realistic, but I didn't get to read much of that because I dnf'd it at about 20% :/
Buc and Eld board a ship to go get to Plot(tm), and Eld immediately goes to look broodingly at the sea and conveniently remember his own backstory. He ends this explaino-flashback with a cliche'd like about how he didn't save Buc, Buc saved him. He had time to stand there and painstakingly think out so much of his own thoughts and past--technically, a "show" given we saw this as a flashback of an action-memory, but it only happened to tell the reader what's up with him--but he couldn't devote literally any thought whatsoever to why or HOW the hell Buc saved him? Literally, how did she?? Just by ... being there? Letting him rescue her from the streets? How did he do that? No answers for those questions though.
Buc is very seasick on the journey, but that's all entirely glossed over because we spend the whole time with Eld broodily remembering his own past. So then in the next several chapters, where Buc repeatedly thinks about how she's never been so tired or so messed up before, I genuinely had no idea what she was talking about. What on EARTH was making these few days any different from any other day in her life? Turns out it was the seasickness! I guess?? The seasickness we literally did not see AT ALL, but then suddenly after a couple of chapters on land, she finally succumbs to this fever she's had the whole time that wasn't shown or mentioned or anything other than her continually referencing how fucked up she is with zero explanation for what she's talking about.
Also, her and Eld are supposed to be so incredibly close, best friends who ~saved each other~ yet she doesn't know anything about his backstory whatsoever. They've just. Never had a conversation. I guess. It seems Eld did deliberately not talk about his past to her, but not even in a way like-- ""Buc knew Eld had deep dark secrets because he never discussed his past, but she didn't know those secrets involved mages"" (really bad made up example there) --there's no actual sense that Buc had tried to ask about his past, that he had either misled her or shut down that conversation, it just honestly seems like they've been friends for years and then one day Buc is SHOCKED to discover that he existed and had a life before knowing her. Because they've just never talked to each other at all I suppose!
I will say I did like the few parts I managed to read of Buc's neurodivergence (some sensory issues, racing thoughts, could be autistic or ADHD) that felt realistic, but I didn't get to read much of that because I dnf'd it at about 20% :/