A review by kaiyakaiyo
An Education in Malice by S.T. Gibson

dark emotional hopeful mysterious reflective sad tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I enjoyed this SO MUCH. I’m not usually an enemies to lovers fan, but it was so well-executed here that I ate it up. Good book scramble brain so let me break my likes and (few) dislikes down in bullets:

Likes:
-the writing is so… crisp but sexy. it’s nearly as poetic as both characters, and I felt along with them. A treat for the eyes/brain
-laura is interesting and strange, but not in a Not Like Other Girls Protagonist way. she likes reading bdsm poetry and also wants to be a priest, she likes bad bitches but also wants to dominate them (!!!!), and she’s frank about what she wants and feels when she reaches the limits of her “southern manners”. She felt real. Not exaggeratedly shy or brash for plot, just a girl doing her best and feeling with her whole heart 
-Elenore - books can often go in a tokeny black best friend direction, but this one managed to represent Elenore as a true, dedicated friend that supported Laura realistically without leaning into babysitting or mammying her. Elenore was my favorite char after laura tbh, she’s just that magnetic and kind.
-BIG one: Realistic depiction of how an older person can sway and stunt the growth of younger people in a relationship, regardless of them being “of age” or free to make their own decisions. Carmilla, and even Laura to an extent are frozen in time by De Lafontaine’s smothering; even Laura who is more able to see De Lafontaines manipulations for what they are is still swayed by her authority, her majesty, her power over them as someone with more life experience. The trajectory of her life is changed due to De Lafontaines need to collect girls; her grades slip, her friends miss her, and she feels disconnected from the world around her. Carmilla has few friends, and misses out on so many foundational college experiences because of how consumed she is by her professor. This book was a very true to life depiction of why “they’re both adults” means very little when dealing with power imbalances in a relationship. De Lafountaine was literally and figuratively sucking the youth out of these girls to sooth her own stolen years, by blood/vampirism and by time missed being 20-somethings discovering themselves in college. The only thing that put a stop to the toxic codependence was De Lafontaine herself; even with full understanding of how poorly she treated them, the girls could not fully extricate themselves from wanting to be loved by her. sad, complicated, twisted, but so well-rendered. Carmilla isn’t magically un-hooked, and even Laura isn’t immune to De Lafontaine by the end; they both will need time to heal and process the ways De Lafontaine warped how they see love and interacting with other people. I don’t think this is a permanent hurt, but it is one that Laura and Carmilla will probably have to reckon with in her wake both together and separately. the author treated this topic with all the seriousness yet hopefulness it deserves; these aren’t broken girls forever damaged, they are hurt girls that were taken advantage of by someone who experienced that same hurt and allowed herself to perpetuate it. The author is frank about how toxic it is, but optimistic about Carmilla and Laura on the other side of it, as well as De Lafontaines own reckoning with her toxic past. 
- on that note, De Lafontaines breakthrough was really interesting. I’d been mildly afraid of some snape-esque redemption murder-suicide with her day one, but I was pleasantly surprised that DLF actually went the distance of realizing that she was continuing the cycle of abuse and manipulation, actively trying to change, doing away with her abuser, and freeing Carmilla as much as she was able. The damage is still done, and she’s permanently changed Carmilla’s life, but at least taking herself out of the equation was a huge step from where she began the book (jealous, domineering, secretive, etc.) I am really intrigued by the author showing us this, and think it’s a much gritter, realer way of doing away with a villain - there’s no magic “I want to be good now” moment or victorious defeat; she just wakes the fuck up and tries to not traumatize any more 20-somethings. She can’t undo her wrongs, but she can choose to stop making them, which requires self-awareness and will power I didn’t expect from her. I started the book wanting her staked along with her freak ex, and ended the book wishing her somewhat well on her journey of growth as long as it was far away from young women. Go figure!
-academic rivals done RIGHT. I hate when rivals/enemies to lovers is either half-assed snipes then they randomly kiss or just straight up bullying and hate crimes from one half of the relationship and we’re supposed to think it’s sexy & root for them. I don’t think emotional and physical abuse before you even start dating is cute AT ALL. So this book was a REVELATION compared to ETL like that. These girls are at each others throats academically, but look out for each other, at first bc of girl code/politeness, but increasingly out of fondness. They do a tasty two steps forward one step back with vulnerability and admitting their feelings, and their jockeying for DLF’s approval (toxic older woman aside) was incredible. When they finally touch it’s actually “sizzling” (I usually hate that word in book reviews, but it really fits!) because they really built up the dislike and indifference act, all to be fantasizing about the other on their knees in private. if more ETL is like this, I’ll read it! Their dynamic was lovely, and I love how even amidst the competition, they truly grew to love and protect the other, even from their shared object of admiration. all around great!
-dark academia done right! when I think dark academia, I think The Woods. a lot of this subgenre is just “people are morally grey in a school setting, there might be violence” but this. this is truly dark. immoral professors, bodies dropping, cutesy all girls school facade with a literal creature in the floors, blood sharing, secrets. Ugh. gimme more 

Dislikes:
Honestly I don’t remember what I was gonna put here. maybe just that I wish I’d been able to see Carmilla inflict more rage on DLF for turning her. that rage/sadness felt a bit untapped; I would’ve liked a little more time spent on how Carmilla felt staring down eternity because her goofy ass older vampire obsession brought her too close to  her crazy ex. She was killed, and it felt like she didn’t really process it. Having said that, I understand that Carmilla wasn’t one to follow her feelings to their logical conclusions, mostly due to DLFs hold on her. Multiple times in the book she comes to the brink of truly being angry, saddened, even done with DLF, just for DLF to love bomb or shame her into letting it go. She treats her like rightful frustration and pain are childish, and Carmilla internalizes that to her detriment. kinda talked myself out of my only dislike there, bc honestly it fits more than I thought. I think I just wanted to see De Lafontaine get mollywopped.

That was sooo long, but I actually loved the fuck out of this book and am skipping the long line of next books I have to read A Dowry of Blood. 
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