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A review by reneeannreads
The Astonishing Color of After by Emily X.R. Pan
5.0
When I make my Book of the Month selections, it’s not always a guarantee that I will enjoy the book I choose. With The Astonishing Color of After, I had a feeling I was going to really love reading it before I even started. I was right.
TACoA is a magnificent story of the love that lingers even after we are gone and how are past is how we can hold on to those we’ve lost.
After Leigh’s mother commits suicide, she is visited by a mysterious red bird that she quickly realizes is the spirit of her mother, encouraging her to go to Taiwan to the grandparents she’s never met. Through this trip to Taiwan, Leigh makes deeper connections with the family she’s never known, while also learning how to hold on to her mother’s memory now that she’s gone.
What’s creative and works so well about the way this book’s pacing moves is that in between chapters of Leigh with her family in Taiwan, we get not only glimpses of the year leading up to her mother’s death, but also memories of old from those she is closest to that tell stories of their pasts as well. It’s never confusing or choppy because those memories tie in so perfectly with the main portion of the story.
What touched me the most is the way Emily X.R. Pan (who is easily one of my new favorite authors) treated the subjects of mental illness and suicide. As someone who personally struggles with mental illness and is a survivor, it’s important when an author gets this right, and Pan got this so so right. As Leigh searches for some sign, some explanation for her mother’s suicide, the memories we’re shown tell her all she needs to know: that sometimes there’s no explanation and it’s not always easy to see the warning signs until it’s too late. Leigh’s mother is depicted so well in this respect– while most of her story in this book does revolve around memories and glimpses of the past, you don’t just see a woman who’s been struggling with this illness for so long, but you also see a woman with so much love and passion in her heart that’s had to put up a great fight just to hold on to that love and passion in her spirit.
Pan also has a very thoughtful author’s note at the end for those who may be dealing with a similar situation or knows someone who lives with mental illness, also providing resources with information about suicide and how to get help. The sensitivity and care that she takes with the subject matter is very encouraging to see.
Why you should read this:
•The characters are so nicely human and fleshed out, to the point where I was wishing the book was longer so I could spend more time with all of them.
•Pan’s writing style is very clean and easy to read, making this a book you can tear through so quickly you won’t even realize you’re halfway done (guilty!).
•The story is one that anyone can find some aspect of it they can relate to. It’s about family and those we love and the impact they leave on us.
•The spiritualism is also very universal. It’s a beautiful portrayal about how those we love are still around us when we need them most.
•The representation! There’s so much positive representation of various sorts, but primarily Chinese culture and how Leigh carries this.
What I Wanted More Of:
•Leigh getting to know more about her grandfather. I know the focus was more on her grandmother for a reason, but since he couldn’t speak, it would have been nice to see a memory dedicated solely to him.
•Leigh’s relationship with her dad. While we see it a lot through memories, I wished the ending had been a bit longer to maybe encompass more of how he was dealing with the loss too, or perhaps more about them talking about her mother more at the end.
I was shocked when I reached the last page, because I wanted to spend so much more time with Leigh and her friends and family. A beautiful book that reminds us to hold on to what we have and help those we love who may be struggling.
Rating:★★★★★
TACoA is a magnificent story of the love that lingers even after we are gone and how are past is how we can hold on to those we’ve lost.
After Leigh’s mother commits suicide, she is visited by a mysterious red bird that she quickly realizes is the spirit of her mother, encouraging her to go to Taiwan to the grandparents she’s never met. Through this trip to Taiwan, Leigh makes deeper connections with the family she’s never known, while also learning how to hold on to her mother’s memory now that she’s gone.
What’s creative and works so well about the way this book’s pacing moves is that in between chapters of Leigh with her family in Taiwan, we get not only glimpses of the year leading up to her mother’s death, but also memories of old from those she is closest to that tell stories of their pasts as well. It’s never confusing or choppy because those memories tie in so perfectly with the main portion of the story.
What touched me the most is the way Emily X.R. Pan (who is easily one of my new favorite authors) treated the subjects of mental illness and suicide. As someone who personally struggles with mental illness and is a survivor, it’s important when an author gets this right, and Pan got this so so right. As Leigh searches for some sign, some explanation for her mother’s suicide, the memories we’re shown tell her all she needs to know: that sometimes there’s no explanation and it’s not always easy to see the warning signs until it’s too late. Leigh’s mother is depicted so well in this respect– while most of her story in this book does revolve around memories and glimpses of the past, you don’t just see a woman who’s been struggling with this illness for so long, but you also see a woman with so much love and passion in her heart that’s had to put up a great fight just to hold on to that love and passion in her spirit.
Pan also has a very thoughtful author’s note at the end for those who may be dealing with a similar situation or knows someone who lives with mental illness, also providing resources with information about suicide and how to get help. The sensitivity and care that she takes with the subject matter is very encouraging to see.
Why you should read this:
•The characters are so nicely human and fleshed out, to the point where I was wishing the book was longer so I could spend more time with all of them.
•Pan’s writing style is very clean and easy to read, making this a book you can tear through so quickly you won’t even realize you’re halfway done (guilty!).
•The story is one that anyone can find some aspect of it they can relate to. It’s about family and those we love and the impact they leave on us.
•The spiritualism is also very universal. It’s a beautiful portrayal about how those we love are still around us when we need them most.
•The representation! There’s so much positive representation of various sorts, but primarily Chinese culture and how Leigh carries this.
What I Wanted More Of:
•Leigh getting to know more about her grandfather. I know the focus was more on her grandmother for a reason, but since he couldn’t speak, it would have been nice to see a memory dedicated solely to him.
•Leigh’s relationship with her dad. While we see it a lot through memories, I wished the ending had been a bit longer to maybe encompass more of how he was dealing with the loss too, or perhaps more about them talking about her mother more at the end.
I was shocked when I reached the last page, because I wanted to spend so much more time with Leigh and her friends and family. A beautiful book that reminds us to hold on to what we have and help those we love who may be struggling.
Rating:★★★★★