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A review by jrabbit12
Winter's Tale by Mark Helprin
1.0
This book is so bad. So, so bad. I'm a little more than half way through and the corny just keeps coming. Helprin doesn't develop characters but instead barely alters the Disney-esq clichés he borrows from. Every couple is essentially the same as the couple before, the only distinction is that they become more irritating with every reiteration/reincarnation. I struggled to discover why these paper-thin personalities were ever attracted to each other and what actual content their relationships held (none by the way).
I hardly ever abandon books, because I'm of the opinion that if I verbally dislike something, I should be able to cite reasons why. Well, here's at least one reason. Yesterday I turned to reviews on the book for guiding advice on whether or not I should steady on through the novel. In reading the reviews, I discovered there's supposedly a villain in this story. Yes, the character has been reference two or three times in the first section of the book, as a mysterious bridge builder. Oooohhhh. And as of the end of section two (more than half way through the book) that is all that is known about the "villain". There is yet no indication that he is good or bad, just that he builds bridges. Apparently, he's a fallen angel, something something dark side, blahblahblah, this book is so boring, and maybe it's because an evil bridge builder was introduced and as of more than half way through the book HASN'T DONE ANYTHING. I hope his eventual role is to build a bridge that every character in the book jumps off of. Some magical-evil-rainbow-cloud-bridge that attracts white horses, people with consumption, newspaper columnists, and people who fall in love through walls.
Lake is an idiot, Beverly is obnoxious, who cares about Christiana going from poverty, to a Daisy Buchanan lifestyle, to being a maid, to falling in love through a wall? Virginia and Haberdashery, or whatever his stupid name is, are the most filled out characters in the book and they are boring too. These are not fleshed out characters but shadows of the exact same archetype regurgitated over and over.
I didn't intend to be so vitreous, but the more I think about this book the more annoyed I get. I’m actually having a hard time picking my next book to start because this one made reading seem like a punishment.
This is the worst magical realism book I've ever read. This isn’t even magical realism, it’s a poorly executed mash-up of magical elements held together by nothing more than the front and back covers. Should an actual alter-dimensional-cloud wall exist, I would throw this book into it and Helprin as well. If you are at all curious about the actual story, if there even is one, then just wait for the movie to come out. This is one of the few cases in which I'm sure the movie will be better than the book. If Russel Crowe's face can't fix this mess, then nothing can.
I hardly ever abandon books, because I'm of the opinion that if I verbally dislike something, I should be able to cite reasons why. Well, here's at least one reason. Yesterday I turned to reviews on the book for guiding advice on whether or not I should steady on through the novel. In reading the reviews, I discovered there's supposedly a villain in this story. Yes, the character has been reference two or three times in the first section of the book, as a mysterious bridge builder. Oooohhhh. And as of the end of section two (more than half way through the book) that is all that is known about the "villain". There is yet no indication that he is good or bad, just that he builds bridges. Apparently, he's a fallen angel, something something dark side, blahblahblah, this book is so boring, and maybe it's because an evil bridge builder was introduced and as of more than half way through the book HASN'T DONE ANYTHING. I hope his eventual role is to build a bridge that every character in the book jumps off of. Some magical-evil-rainbow-cloud-bridge that attracts white horses, people with consumption, newspaper columnists, and people who fall in love through walls.
Lake is an idiot, Beverly is obnoxious, who cares about Christiana going from poverty, to a Daisy Buchanan lifestyle, to being a maid, to falling in love through a wall? Virginia and Haberdashery, or whatever his stupid name is, are the most filled out characters in the book and they are boring too. These are not fleshed out characters but shadows of the exact same archetype regurgitated over and over.
I didn't intend to be so vitreous, but the more I think about this book the more annoyed I get. I’m actually having a hard time picking my next book to start because this one made reading seem like a punishment.
This is the worst magical realism book I've ever read. This isn’t even magical realism, it’s a poorly executed mash-up of magical elements held together by nothing more than the front and back covers. Should an actual alter-dimensional-cloud wall exist, I would throw this book into it and Helprin as well. If you are at all curious about the actual story, if there even is one, then just wait for the movie to come out. This is one of the few cases in which I'm sure the movie will be better than the book. If Russel Crowe's face can't fix this mess, then nothing can.