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A review by tasharobinson
The Cabin in the Woods: The Official Movie Novelization by Drew Goddard, Joss Whedon, Tim Lebbon
3.0
Read this one in order to discuss it on a podcast. (It was a great deep-dive conversation, with a ton to say about how the movie, novelization, and script all differ from each other.) It was an interesting read — very close to the movie in most regards, but with a few small bits that were in the screenplay and not in the movie, and with a visible attempt (familiar from other movie novelizations) to fill out the characters while not adding any dialogue. Unfortunately, the filling-out process turned Sitterson (the Robert Jenkins character) into a raging sexist, and Hadley (the Bradley Whitford character) into a racist. That isn't my interpretation — Sitterson (who narrates all the puppeteer segments, with Hadley relegated to just a background character) literally muses about what a sexist he is, and what a racist Hadley is.
This manifests throughout the book via Sitterson spending a LOT of time thinking about how "all women are mad" and holding them in contempt, while also ogling every woman he sees and thinking in detail about wanting to fuck them, especially Lin, the Chem head played in the movie by Amy Acker. (He also spends a fair bit of time focusing on her tight hair bun, which he thinks is so severe that styling her hair probably requires machine assistance.) Through Sitterson's ogling, we find out that Dana (Kristen Connolly) has shaved pubes, which "doesn't do it" for Sitterson, but he notes that Hadley really does like "baldies." I didn't need to know any of this.
Overall, it's a functional novelization. There are some poetic bits, usually built around violence and death. But it's nowhere near as satisfying, entertaining, funny, or scary as the movie.
This manifests throughout the book via Sitterson spending a LOT of time thinking about how "all women are mad" and holding them in contempt, while also ogling every woman he sees and thinking in detail about wanting to fuck them, especially Lin, the Chem head played in the movie by Amy Acker. (He also spends a fair bit of time focusing on her tight hair bun, which he thinks is so severe that styling her hair probably requires machine assistance.) Through Sitterson's ogling, we find out that Dana (Kristen Connolly) has shaved pubes, which "doesn't do it" for Sitterson, but he notes that Hadley really does like "baldies." I didn't need to know any of this.
Overall, it's a functional novelization. There are some poetic bits, usually built around violence and death. But it's nowhere near as satisfying, entertaining, funny, or scary as the movie.