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A review by shannonleighd
Flirt by Laurell K. Hamilton
2.0
I want to start off by saying that this wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And it definitely wasn't as bad as it could have been. I had the lowest of hopes for this one after reading Divine Misdemeanors (★) last year so maybe that's why I liked Flirt more. Trust me though, it was nowhere near perfect and was also still far away from her earlier books in the series. I'm slightly wary though, could this be a sign of things to come? Will the Anita books continue to get better? I'm afraid to think this because I've been disappointed in Hamilton since Obsidian Butterfly. I'm afraid to hope.
"It made me hopeful, and I cursed it, because hope will keep you alive, yes, but it will also get you killed in ways worse than anything you can imagine. Hope is a bad friend when men with guns have you. But my lioness and their lions lusted after each other, sort of. Lust I trusted. Hope will lie to you, but lust is what it is; it never lies. Hope would keep me hoping, but lust might be a weapon I could use to divide them ..."
::groan::
And there it is. We get back to the Hamilton we've all come to know over the past few years. The one that latches onto a word or two and beats it into the ground. Someone please mail Hamilton a thesaurus. This passage isn't a rarity either and it's a constant reminder of what a lazy writer she has become.
I'm going to fast forward to the afterword now. I found it hilarious (in a bad way), sad, and frustrating and it made me want to deduct a star from my review score. She comes off as incredibly pretentious and arrogant and I honestly wish I hadn't read it and just stopped reading when Anita's story ended. She talks about how people ask her all the time where she gets her ideas and how she can write a whole book. I laughed out loud at this because she hasn't written a whole new book in YEARS. If you've read anything by her it won't take you long at all to find conversations, phrases, descriptions, scenes, and explanations practically pulled word for word from previous books. I can understand trying to explain things for new readers but come on, she doesn't even try to hide the fact that she's lifting whole passages and copied and pasted them into new books. And, the story in Flirt was only 158 pages long! About a third of the novella was stuff I had read in previous installments of the series. To me, this isn't the sign of a strong writer, it's the sign of a lazy one that's struggling, and I find it comical that's she's trying to give advice to aspiring authors.
I know I'm spending a lot of time on a part of the book that wasn't even the story but it just really struck a nerve. She also decided that it was a good idea to retell the same scene 3 TIMES! First, we read the original scene in the novel, then we get a retelling of the original event that inspired Anita's scene, THEN we get a comic of the scene. Now here's the thing; it's a BORING SCENE! When I was reading Anita's bit I was bored to tears, so you can imagine my surprise when it shows up not once, but twice more. And just the way she writes in the afterword she's making it sound like she's soooo clever for coming up with Flirt from her "real-life" experience.
And another thing, she does something in the afterword that she's constantly doing in her books as well that DRIVES ME NUTS:
"I am going to tell you where the idea for Flirt first came from. I'm going to tell you the first scene that came into my head, because most books start with a scene for me. I'll tell you the first idea, and I'll even tell you the fertile ground that that idea found to land on, which happened nearly a year before ... I'm going to tell you the schedule I kept, the pages I wrote per day, the music I listened to, and the books I read for extra research while writing the book. I am going to lay my process bare for you."
Quit telling me you're going to tell me something and just tell me it already!
Sigh ...
So, the story. Here's the crazy thing: I liked it! If you can get passed all the poor writing mechanics the story is actually enjoyable. We finally get back to Anita raising zombies and most of her men are absent for the better part of the novel. I've come to the realization now though that I like Anita when she's by herself and not constantly covered in men and having to deal with their moping and posturing. The scenes with Jason, Nathaniel, and Micah were the weakest in the novel. When we finally get to the meat of the story and the two crazy lions join in things get really interesting. It felt like I was reading the old Anita again. I found myself reading furiously, trying to get to the end to see what would happen to everyone. I stayed up until 5 in the morning reading so I could finish. I haven't felt that need with her books for a long time now. It was nice to have it back.
I'm still sick of Anita's magical vagina and how she collects a new man (or two) every book now though. It's gotten to the point where the original men are all but forgotten. Jean-Claude doesn't even have a phone call with her in this book, which I think is all he got in Skin Trade. I miss the vampires, there isn't a single appearance of one in this novella but it seems like maybe the were politics could be over finally. I think they might be now, but I'm not sure. She could collect another strain of lycanthropy though and start the process of finding a mate for it all over again. I'm hoping Hamilton doesn't follow that path though because it's gotten old.
I'm wondering if I liked this book because it was more stream-lined. Like I said before, it's very short, and I'm worried that [b:Bullet|7121598|Bullet (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #19)|Laurell K. Hamilton|http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1292915430s/7121598.jpg|7382823], at twice the length, is going to be a bloated mess.
I'm flirting with hope though. And I'm scared of the power of hoping, because to flirt with that power IS to hope. But I smile at that and flirt with the hope that I CAN hope. And there's power in that. Because hoping IS power. And flirting is power. I hope I have the power to hope there's hope for Anita. I smile and flirt at the idea. Because she needs the power of hoping more than any of us.
"It made me hopeful, and I cursed it, because hope will keep you alive, yes, but it will also get you killed in ways worse than anything you can imagine. Hope is a bad friend when men with guns have you. But my lioness and their lions lusted after each other, sort of. Lust I trusted. Hope will lie to you, but lust is what it is; it never lies. Hope would keep me hoping, but lust might be a weapon I could use to divide them ..."
::groan::
And there it is. We get back to the Hamilton we've all come to know over the past few years. The one that latches onto a word or two and beats it into the ground. Someone please mail Hamilton a thesaurus. This passage isn't a rarity either and it's a constant reminder of what a lazy writer she has become.
I'm going to fast forward to the afterword now. I found it hilarious (in a bad way), sad, and frustrating and it made me want to deduct a star from my review score. She comes off as incredibly pretentious and arrogant and I honestly wish I hadn't read it and just stopped reading when Anita's story ended. She talks about how people ask her all the time where she gets her ideas and how she can write a whole book. I laughed out loud at this because she hasn't written a whole new book in YEARS. If you've read anything by her it won't take you long at all to find conversations, phrases, descriptions, scenes, and explanations practically pulled word for word from previous books. I can understand trying to explain things for new readers but come on, she doesn't even try to hide the fact that she's lifting whole passages and copied and pasted them into new books. And, the story in Flirt was only 158 pages long! About a third of the novella was stuff I had read in previous installments of the series. To me, this isn't the sign of a strong writer, it's the sign of a lazy one that's struggling, and I find it comical that's she's trying to give advice to aspiring authors.
I know I'm spending a lot of time on a part of the book that wasn't even the story but it just really struck a nerve. She also decided that it was a good idea to retell the same scene 3 TIMES! First, we read the original scene in the novel, then we get a retelling of the original event that inspired Anita's scene, THEN we get a comic of the scene. Now here's the thing; it's a BORING SCENE! When I was reading Anita's bit I was bored to tears, so you can imagine my surprise when it shows up not once, but twice more. And just the way she writes in the afterword she's making it sound like she's soooo clever for coming up with Flirt from her "real-life" experience.
And another thing, she does something in the afterword that she's constantly doing in her books as well that DRIVES ME NUTS:
"I am going to tell you where the idea for Flirt first came from. I'm going to tell you the first scene that came into my head, because most books start with a scene for me. I'll tell you the first idea, and I'll even tell you the fertile ground that that idea found to land on, which happened nearly a year before ... I'm going to tell you the schedule I kept, the pages I wrote per day, the music I listened to, and the books I read for extra research while writing the book. I am going to lay my process bare for you."
Quit telling me you're going to tell me something and just tell me it already!
Sigh ...
So, the story. Here's the crazy thing: I liked it! If you can get passed all the poor writing mechanics the story is actually enjoyable. We finally get back to Anita raising zombies and most of her men are absent for the better part of the novel. I've come to the realization now though that I like Anita when she's by herself and not constantly covered in men and having to deal with their moping and posturing. The scenes with Jason, Nathaniel, and Micah were the weakest in the novel. When we finally get to the meat of the story and the two crazy lions join in things get really interesting. It felt like I was reading the old Anita again. I found myself reading furiously, trying to get to the end to see what would happen to everyone. I stayed up until 5 in the morning reading so I could finish. I haven't felt that need with her books for a long time now. It was nice to have it back.
I'm still sick of Anita's magical vagina and how she collects a new man (or two) every book now though. It's gotten to the point where the original men are all but forgotten. Jean-Claude doesn't even have a phone call with her in this book, which I think is all he got in Skin Trade. I miss the vampires, there isn't a single appearance of one in this novella but it seems like maybe the were politics could be over finally. I think they might be now, but I'm not sure. She could collect another strain of lycanthropy though and start the process of finding a mate for it all over again. I'm hoping Hamilton doesn't follow that path though because it's gotten old.
I'm wondering if I liked this book because it was more stream-lined. Like I said before, it's very short, and I'm worried that [b:Bullet|7121598|Bullet (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #19)|Laurell K. Hamilton|http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1292915430s/7121598.jpg|7382823], at twice the length, is going to be a bloated mess.
I'm flirting with hope though. And I'm scared of the power of hoping, because to flirt with that power IS to hope. But I smile at that and flirt with the hope that I CAN hope. And there's power in that. Because hoping IS power. And flirting is power. I hope I have the power to hope there's hope for Anita. I smile and flirt at the idea. Because she needs the power of hoping more than any of us.