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ratlinggum 's review for:
Pretty Little Tease
by A.J. Merlin
I've finally finished this bullshit book!!!!!
This story took quite an unexpected turn that I wish it didn't. I'm ngl, I went into the story blind, so I didn't expect the serial killer subplot. But even then, I didn't think the two MMCs would be the serial killers because the book was mentioning one of her fans quite a lot so I thought it was him, but lo and behold.
Serial killers? Check. Accusing innocent university professors? Check. Solomon, the supposed suspect, being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Well, excuse him for not teaching a course on "Avoiding Crime Scenes 101." He is a university teacher bitch, where do you want him to be? Other than being grumpy, this man has does nothing but mind his business.
And don't even get me started on Oliver, one of our MMCs with a penchant for murder. His motives were so deranged and pathetic I half-expected him to break into a villainous monologue twirling a mustache. "I kill for love, and my favourite colour is blood red. Also, I enjoy long walks on crime scenes." Both MMCs were as mysterious as a blank page. Likes, dislikes, favourite color—who cares? They're hot, I guess. All we get is that they find Blair "interesting." Seriously, guys, is there an "interesting" gene that I missed? But Blair, our riveting FMC, has the depth of a puddle. Blonde, pale, loves Egyptian stuff, and has a self-proclaimed case of boringitis. Cupid must've had the day off when shooting arrows at this trio.
Speaking of Blair, her friend Juniper was the only one with a functioning brain cell in this book and I think she deserves an apology. When faced with the opportunity to spill the murderous tea, Blair goes,
And let's not forget the inconsistency parade. Tattoos covered for anonymity because she is cam girl, except at parties, where they're on full display. Not the mention that the MM portion of this trio was almost non-existent. Perhaps the author was going for subtle, but this was too subtle. Maybe the MM part was the friends we made along the way. Idk, I'm coping at this point.
All in all, I'm disappointed because the premise of the book seemed so interesting and now I feel, cheated. Save your precious time, folks. You're better off attempting brain surgery blindfolded than trudging through this book. Trust me, pick up literally anything else—maybe a dictionary for a more thrilling read.
This story took quite an unexpected turn that I wish it didn't. I'm ngl, I went into the story blind, so I didn't expect the serial killer subplot. But even then, I didn't think the two MMCs would be the serial killers because the book was mentioning one of her fans quite a lot so I thought it was him, but lo and behold.
Serial killers? Check. Accusing innocent university professors? Check. Solomon, the supposed suspect, being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Well, excuse him for not teaching a course on "Avoiding Crime Scenes 101." He is a university teacher bitch, where do you want him to be? Other than being grumpy, this man has does nothing but mind his business.
And don't even get me started on Oliver, one of our MMCs with a penchant for murder. His motives were so deranged and pathetic I half-expected him to break into a villainous monologue twirling a mustache. "I kill for love, and my favourite colour is blood red. Also, I enjoy long walks on crime scenes." Both MMCs were as mysterious as a blank page. Likes, dislikes, favourite color—who cares? They're hot, I guess. All we get is that they find Blair "interesting." Seriously, guys, is there an "interesting" gene that I missed? But Blair, our riveting FMC, has the depth of a puddle. Blonde, pale, loves Egyptian stuff, and has a self-proclaimed case of boringitis. Cupid must've had the day off when shooting arrows at this trio.
Speaking of Blair, her friend Juniper was the only one with a functioning brain cell in this book and I think she deserves an apology. When faced with the opportunity to spill the murderous tea, Blair goes,
“Besides, it feels wrong to tell her. It feels… I don’t really know, I guess. I just want to push it out of my brain instead of letting it show on my face, because somehow, it doesn’t feel like Juniper’s business.”Sweetie, one of your boy toys wants to turn your friend into a human jigsaw puzzle—pretty sure that qualifies as her business.
And let's not forget the inconsistency parade. Tattoos covered for anonymity because she is cam girl, except at parties, where they're on full display. Not the mention that the MM portion of this trio was almost non-existent. Perhaps the author was going for subtle, but this was too subtle. Maybe the MM part was the friends we made along the way. Idk, I'm coping at this point.
All in all, I'm disappointed because the premise of the book seemed so interesting and now I feel, cheated. Save your precious time, folks. You're better off attempting brain surgery blindfolded than trudging through this book. Trust me, pick up literally anything else—maybe a dictionary for a more thrilling read.