A review by cameeroo
A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I didn't really expect that a book infamous for scarring people for life, could also affect me emotionally and.....m̸̛̖͠ẻ̷͔̳͛̄n̵͓̿̈͜͠t̶̖̽̐́a̴͙̻̍l̶̞̺̀̚ḷ̵̘͋ÿ̴̕͘ͅ :)

I wanna say that it might be coincidence that I've suffered mental breakdowns and existential crises during the four months I've been reading this book, but it didn't help that I find the main character very relateable, even though I've never experienced most things he's been through. I guess that's because the author did a great job in realistically writing how a person's mind would run, so it's easy to empathize with a character, because at least once in your life, you've thought or felt that way too. 

Honestly, my first impression with the book was the paragraphs are extremely lengthy and sometimes too dragging for me to handle, and I was overwhelmed by the amount of characters that was thrown into every scene, that I had to list down their names so I could remember who's who. But later on, I understood that the author just wants to set the mood of a place or event, or to personally introduce you a character, whom you'd probably be attached to as you progress.

Like all other forms of media that I consume, I don't think that every book, especially fiction, should have a moral lesson, because sometimes it's enough for a book to just tell a story. But since this book hits so close to home for me, I've gotten a lot of things from it aside from being entertained(? I seriously don't know the best word to describe "I had a terrible time, in a good way") by the story it told. And personally the most important "lesson" I've learned might be: no matter how terrible life could get, it will always get better. Or maybe it already is better, but we're just too focused with how much we've been scarred by the bad things, we forget to notice that good things also exist in our lives. We've heard this been said a million times, and we've probably told someone this before to comfort them. But as cliche as it sounds, it is true. To quote a line from the book, "All the most terrifying Ifs involve people. All the good ones do as well." And for us to realize that, we have to ask help from other people when we need it, because even if you think otherwise, there will always be someone who is willing to offer you a helping hand. You are not alone. No one is truly alone.

So even if this book had given me a few nightmares (legit, I'm not speaking metaphorically right now), I'm somewhat thankful because it's one of the things that's currently helping me get over my self hatred, doubt and distrust towards people around me, and other bad coping mechanisms. Though I'm rating this with a perfect score, it's hard to recommend it to people, especially if you're going through something at the moment (and most especially if you are clinically depressed and/or have suicidal tendencies, because there are A LOT of triggering scenes and topics in it). Probably read it alongside a book with a lighter topic, or maybe it is best to read this for months instead of one sitting or something, because it's really draining to read. 

Read with caution, that's all.

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