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A review by jackiehorne
For Her Own Good by Tamsen Parker
4.0
I have some mixed feelings about Parker's latest erotic romance, despite the high rating I've given it. The writing is fabulous (unsurprising, given Parker's track record), the characters sympathetic and compelling, and the kink is portrayed with respect and care. But the idea of a psychiatrist/patient sexual relationship, even if the psychiatrist hasn't treated the patient in a VERY long time, gave me pause.
The story:
A male psychiatrist who had an inappropriate attraction to an adolescent female patient struggling with major depression chooses to leave his practice, his home, and his patient behind in order to remove himself from temptation. This story begins 15 years later, when the psychiatrist, Lowry Campbell, knowing that the recent death of Starla Patrick's high-profile father is likely to be difficult for her, decides to once again upend his life, moving back from Chicago to Boston, where his former patient still lives. Starla has left her tumultuous teen years behind her and grown into a successful adult who manages both her small business (coaching others with mental health issues on how to best organize their space and schedules) and her depression with skill and aplomb. But Dr. Campbell's new job is at the same hospital where Starla's current doctor is, and it isn't too long before the two encounter one another. Starla was devastated by her doctor's abandonment, and is embarrassed by her lingering crush on him, so she initially refuses his friendly advances when they run into one another. But Starla's curiosity gradually gets the better of her, and she and Dr. Campbell begin meeting weekly for a friendly dinner. A meeting which gradually transforms into dating, and into lots of kinky sex.
Starla's well aware of her own kinky desires: she gets turned on by feeling like a "little," acting like a small child and being taken care of (and spanked) by a kind, dominant parent figure. She currently plays with a female Dom with whom she can take on the role of child, sans sex, but she'd love to find a male lover whose kink aligns with hers. In contrast, Lowry is wary of his own kinky proclivities and has never explored them. But now that Starla is a consenting thirty-three year-old to Lowry's fifty-one, perhaps it might be safe to admit that what he feels for Starla isn't just affection, or even run-of-the-mill sexual attraction?
The idea of Daddy kink usually makes my skin crawl. But Parker constructs her characters, especially Starla, with such care and respect and emotional heft that I still found myself drawn into their story. Parker's depiction of Starla's work to manage her depression is particularly compelling. Though Starla has her depression under regulation now, it is clear that she is not miraculously cured; she must continual monitor and respond to her mental health as does anyone with a chronic medical condition.
I personally would have enjoyed the story more if Lowry had come back to Boston for reasons other than still being obsessed with Starla (struck me as slightly creepy/stalkerish behavior), but I'm guessing that his obsession will be part of the appeal for many readers—a love that will not die, even after fifteen years of separation.
I do wish, though, that there had been some discussion of transference, and more about the ethics of dating a former patient, in the story itself. I know a lot of people fantasize about their doctors, especially their psychiatrists, and that this is a work of fiction that speaks to such fantasies, not to real life. But as someone who developed her own embarrassing crush on her psychiatrist (as do so many patients during their treatment), I couldn't help but be a little worried by Starla and Lowry's fall into romance.
The American Psychiatric Association's Principles of Medical Ethics states:
"Sexual activity with a current or former patient is unethical" (p. 4). The College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario doesn’t consider sexual contact with former patients to be abuse, but does warn in its boundaries policy that “the physician may still be found to have committed professional misconduct.” The UK's General Medical Council used to discourage doctors from having romantic relationships with former patients, but relaxed their rules in 2013, although they also added other issues to consider before embarking on such a relationship (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4771530/). Clearly, there is disagreement and grey-area in regards to this issue. So, reader be informed...
FYI, Parker and I are both members of the New England Chapter of Romance Writers of America.
The story:
A male psychiatrist who had an inappropriate attraction to an adolescent female patient struggling with major depression chooses to leave his practice, his home, and his patient behind in order to remove himself from temptation. This story begins 15 years later, when the psychiatrist, Lowry Campbell, knowing that the recent death of Starla Patrick's high-profile father is likely to be difficult for her, decides to once again upend his life, moving back from Chicago to Boston, where his former patient still lives. Starla has left her tumultuous teen years behind her and grown into a successful adult who manages both her small business (coaching others with mental health issues on how to best organize their space and schedules) and her depression with skill and aplomb. But Dr. Campbell's new job is at the same hospital where Starla's current doctor is, and it isn't too long before the two encounter one another. Starla was devastated by her doctor's abandonment, and is embarrassed by her lingering crush on him, so she initially refuses his friendly advances when they run into one another. But Starla's curiosity gradually gets the better of her, and she and Dr. Campbell begin meeting weekly for a friendly dinner. A meeting which gradually transforms into dating, and into lots of kinky sex.
Starla's well aware of her own kinky desires: she gets turned on by feeling like a "little," acting like a small child and being taken care of (and spanked) by a kind, dominant parent figure. She currently plays with a female Dom with whom she can take on the role of child, sans sex, but she'd love to find a male lover whose kink aligns with hers. In contrast, Lowry is wary of his own kinky proclivities and has never explored them. But now that Starla is a consenting thirty-three year-old to Lowry's fifty-one, perhaps it might be safe to admit that what he feels for Starla isn't just affection, or even run-of-the-mill sexual attraction?
The idea of Daddy kink usually makes my skin crawl. But Parker constructs her characters, especially Starla, with such care and respect and emotional heft that I still found myself drawn into their story. Parker's depiction of Starla's work to manage her depression is particularly compelling. Though Starla has her depression under regulation now, it is clear that she is not miraculously cured; she must continual monitor and respond to her mental health as does anyone with a chronic medical condition.
I personally would have enjoyed the story more if Lowry had come back to Boston for reasons other than still being obsessed with Starla (struck me as slightly creepy/stalkerish behavior), but I'm guessing that his obsession will be part of the appeal for many readers—a love that will not die, even after fifteen years of separation.
I do wish, though, that there had been some discussion of transference, and more about the ethics of dating a former patient, in the story itself. I know a lot of people fantasize about their doctors, especially their psychiatrists, and that this is a work of fiction that speaks to such fantasies, not to real life. But as someone who developed her own embarrassing crush on her psychiatrist (as do so many patients during their treatment), I couldn't help but be a little worried by Starla and Lowry's fall into romance.
The American Psychiatric Association's Principles of Medical Ethics states:
"Sexual activity with a current or former patient is unethical" (p. 4). The College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario doesn’t consider sexual contact with former patients to be abuse, but does warn in its boundaries policy that “the physician may still be found to have committed professional misconduct.” The UK's General Medical Council used to discourage doctors from having romantic relationships with former patients, but relaxed their rules in 2013, although they also added other issues to consider before embarking on such a relationship (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4771530/). Clearly, there is disagreement and grey-area in regards to this issue. So, reader be informed...
FYI, Parker and I are both members of the New England Chapter of Romance Writers of America.