A review by brogan7
The Island of Sea Women by Lisa See

adventurous challenging informative fast-paced

4.0

I loved the beginning of this book.  I didn't understand how brutal the story it had to tell would become, and I can't say I was quite ready for it.
Also, I couldn't quite relate to the perfect friendship/turned so completely to trauma of a level so deep...I couldn't relate to either of them by then, Mi-ja and her seeming instantaneous change of heart, Young-Sook and her complete unwillingness to listen or interact with her, even if she felt betrayed. 
She had to know that Mi-ja didn't cause the massacre, and that no matter Mi-ja's failure to act, it wasn't all her fault.  And on the other side, what friend asks you to choose one of your children to save? What was that?

The book explicitly and implicitly favoured a "forgiveness" pathway that felt more like passivity than forgiveness.  The ending really pushed toward a particular interpretation, which felt imposed by non-survivors (the author? Or the cultural stereotype of the passive Asian woman?). The character of Young-Sook felt like she wanted to shatter those expectations, and for the better, but she wasn't allowed her free reign.
. Originally, when Mi-ja comes to the ceremony with Shaman Kim, what happened there was wide open for interpretation.  I thought that Shaman Kim was chastising Mi-ja by reminding her of the trauma of the day of the massacre.  She was saying the family members forgave, but they were speaking to Young-sook: they were easing her pain.  To Mi-ja, outside of it all, it seemed to me that they were showing her separateness from the massacre: she was there but not there, she walked away and washed her hands of it, they had nothing to say to her and they were showing their connection to the community, but not to her.  Mi-ja, who could not accept forgiveness anyway, would not have felt herself absolved of guilt by this.  She would have trebled in guilt, for thinking she didn't deserve their forgiveness.
When Shaman Kim reinterprets this at the end of the book, she chastises Young-Sook, she pushes her to forgive Mi-ja, and by extension their Korean attackers, but that is not what was necessarily meant by the family's statements or by Shaman Kim's words to a community member.  I thought Shaman Kim was originally enjoining Young-Sook to forgive herself, as a survivor.  This was much more interesting to me than anything about Mi-ja at that point... Mi-ja's husband could not help them, even if he wanted to, that kind of heroics is for Hollywood...he had chosen his side and Jun-Bu wasn't on it, even had they been friends, which they weren't.  Massacres don't tend well to exceptions, it's unlikely he could have saved his wife, at that point.
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