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A review by jojobeans
Good Girls Marry Doctors: South Asian American Daughters on Obedience and Rebellion by Piyali Bhattacharya
I don’t really feel comfortable rating people’s personal essay’s about their lived experiences, but it was an enjoyable read.
Full review:
I think the book is overall empowering and eye-opening, however, I did see some problematic aspects and some things that I had misconceptions about. For starters, I wasn’t able to relate to the essays as much as I thought I would because this felt a little dated, in the sense that all the authors seemed like full-on millennials (i.e. now in their late 20’s and 30’s), and I don’t really identify with a lot of “millennial culture,” and especially Indian-Canadian/American millennial culture. I also think that as someone in their earl 20’s right now, my struggles and the world around me is much much different from those who are 10 or more years older than me and what they went through. I also wasn’t able to relate to a lot of the Indian American aspects, given that I am Indo-Canadian and I feel the culture here is much different (America is more of a melting pot country, Canada embraces multiculturalism) and the lived experiences I think are much more different than what Indian Americans go through.
I was also disappointed with the lack of Punjabi/Sikh rep in this book, I felt like most of it was focused on Bengali or Bangladeshi women and Muslim/Hindu women, which I, unfortunately, can not relate to. I also personally identify much closer with the distinct Punjabi culture over the broader Indian culture, so that was also why I wasn’t enjoying it as much as I thought I would.
Now for the problematic bits: I felt like many of the essays was bordering the line of judging women who live their lives differently from the authors. Now, this may seem weird since almost all the women in this book live “alternative” lives and therefore you wouldn’t expect a critique like that. However, I felt like a lot of times, many of the authors were almost judging women who chose a traditional life path, or marrying a doctor/lawyer/engineer, or not living independently, or in one of the essays, I felt like the author was judging Indian American women who post themselves in traditional suits in one picture then in booty shorts in the next picture. I think that whether a person picks a traditional path or picks a different path, they are both valid and either choice is empowering in its own way. I have always hated the trope of hating on girls for being “basic” and I was getting a huge vibe of doing just that in a lot of the essays. I think there is a way of empowering women, no matter what life path they take, but this book seemed to lose that sense of being a judgement-free zone, especially when it came to people who stick to the status quo.
Full review:
I think the book is overall empowering and eye-opening, however, I did see some problematic aspects and some things that I had misconceptions about. For starters, I wasn’t able to relate to the essays as much as I thought I would because this felt a little dated, in the sense that all the authors seemed like full-on millennials (i.e. now in their late 20’s and 30’s), and I don’t really identify with a lot of “millennial culture,” and especially Indian-Canadian/American millennial culture. I also think that as someone in their earl 20’s right now, my struggles and the world around me is much much different from those who are 10 or more years older than me and what they went through. I also wasn’t able to relate to a lot of the Indian American aspects, given that I am Indo-Canadian and I feel the culture here is much different (America is more of a melting pot country, Canada embraces multiculturalism) and the lived experiences I think are much more different than what Indian Americans go through.
I was also disappointed with the lack of Punjabi/Sikh rep in this book, I felt like most of it was focused on Bengali or Bangladeshi women and Muslim/Hindu women, which I, unfortunately, can not relate to. I also personally identify much closer with the distinct Punjabi culture over the broader Indian culture, so that was also why I wasn’t enjoying it as much as I thought I would.
Now for the problematic bits: I felt like many of the essays was bordering the line of judging women who live their lives differently from the authors. Now, this may seem weird since almost all the women in this book live “alternative” lives and therefore you wouldn’t expect a critique like that. However, I felt like a lot of times, many of the authors were almost judging women who chose a traditional life path, or marrying a doctor/lawyer/engineer, or not living independently, or in one of the essays, I felt like the author was judging Indian American women who post themselves in traditional suits in one picture then in booty shorts in the next picture. I think that whether a person picks a traditional path or picks a different path, they are both valid and either choice is empowering in its own way. I have always hated the trope of hating on girls for being “basic” and I was getting a huge vibe of doing just that in a lot of the essays. I think there is a way of empowering women, no matter what life path they take, but this book seemed to lose that sense of being a judgement-free zone, especially when it came to people who stick to the status quo.