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A review by engrossedreader
Bernard and the Cloth Monkey by Judith Bryan
4.0
[b:Bernard and the Cloth Monkey|60159068|Bernard and the Cloth Monkey|Judith Bryan|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1677851933l/60159068._SY75_.jpg|14871424] is a quietly harrowing look at a slice of West Indian culture in London's 1990's. The story of a fractured family is deftly revealed in present day conversations and as each daughter reminisce on their past. Just tragic.
Abusive relationships are shit for everyone involved, who isn't conducting or condoning the abuse. For example, an abused wife will put up with a lot because of the belief that there's no where else to go, how will this affect the children and that culturally held thought of " what will people say". Children who are abused and receive no support from the non/less abusive parent (or any trusted adult) are splintered and must remake themselves.
With no valid role models, how can a child do so and be whole, without numerous scars?
"Nothing happened, it's all in your head." - Mummy
It's not that easy to dismiss thoughts that you don't want to hear. You can intentionally not think about issues that disturb your equilibrium but it always remains in the back of your mind bubbling, occasionally revealing itself in quiet moments, violent actions, raised voices, disassociation.
We never get to meet Mummy and Daddy in the present day and that is a blessing as they are awful people. Daddy has recently died and Mummy has gone on a cruise. What we know of these parents are disclosed by their children.
Mummy ignores Ann, side lining her because it's easier than confronting her husband. Because whenever she has, Mummy has been pushed down verbally and physically. It becomes easier to turn her eye and cast the blame (her pent up anger and distress) anywhere but where it truly belongs.
The girls are pitted against each other and the sibling relationship is damaged as they seek security and love outside of the family home. This leads to misfortune, no devastation for both Ann and Beth
For all that it is a heart breaking, it is also an important read. I listened to the audiobook and really had to pause in places because it was hard going, particularly when a stray thought or throw away sentence illustrated another terrible occurrence.
The equal parts of rage and sadness leaves me with much more to say. I'm sure sometime soon, there will be a longer blog post on themes that I've yet to touch on or fully develop.
My thanks to The Libraries Consortium ( elibrary) and their curated list for Black History Month 2023: Saluting Our Sisters, for bringing this book to my attention.
Abusive relationships are shit for everyone involved, who isn't conducting or condoning the abuse. For example, an abused wife will put up with a lot because of the belief that there's no where else to go, how will this affect the children and that culturally held thought of " what will people say". Children who are abused and receive no support from the non/less abusive parent (or any trusted adult) are splintered and must remake themselves.
With no valid role models, how can a child do so and be whole, without numerous scars?
"Nothing happened, it's all in your head." - Mummy
It's not that easy to dismiss thoughts that you don't want to hear. You can intentionally not think about issues that disturb your equilibrium but it always remains in the back of your mind bubbling, occasionally revealing itself in quiet moments, violent actions, raised voices, disassociation.
We never get to meet Mummy and Daddy in the present day and that is a blessing as they are awful people. Daddy has recently died and Mummy has gone on a cruise. What we know of these parents are disclosed by their children.
Mummy ignores Ann, side lining her because it's easier than confronting her husband. Because whenever she has, Mummy has been pushed down verbally and physically. It becomes easier to turn her eye and cast the blame (her pent up anger and distress) anywhere but where it truly belongs.
The girls are pitted against each other and the sibling relationship is damaged as they seek security and love outside of the family home. This leads to misfortune, no devastation for both Ann and Beth
For all that it is a heart breaking, it is also an important read
Spoiler
on domestic violence, sexual abuse and family relationshipsThe equal parts of rage and sadness leaves me with much more to say. I'm sure sometime soon, there will be a longer blog post on themes that I've yet to touch on or fully develop.
My thanks to The Libraries Consortium ( elibrary) and their curated list for Black History Month 2023: Saluting Our Sisters, for bringing this book to my attention.