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dbestrnbsw 's review for:
The Dry Season: A Memoir of Pleasure in a Year Without Sex
by Melissa Febos
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
Following a bad breakup at the age of 32, the author realized that she had been involved in some form of romantic relationship since the age of 15. This, combined with multiple additional issues caused her to recognize that “a feeling of pressure had accumulated for years and accelerated in the previous six months … until the discomfort of staying the same grows greater than my discomfort of changing” – old patterns, old habits that no longer served her well, but led her to question whether her pursuit of love was indeed a form of addiction. An academic, sober since the age of 23, she undertook the ultimate experiment which would become this book. “A good detox is the only way to really know if you’re addicted”, thus began her initial commitment to 90 days of abstinence. She describes her experiences through the filters of ancient mystical women, early feminists, therapy, and the 12-step process. The author’s style is captivating, almost poetic, with a tinge of professorial cadence throughout. At times Part I felt like teasing apart gluten-rich cooked spaghetti and I was not surprised when she questioned whether she might have some form of attention deficit. She brings increased clarity in Parts II and III, where she really begins to take personal responsibility for her past actions. Her examination of historical mentors is both experiential and well documented in her attached Notes and Works Cited and Consulted at the end of the narrative. Febos bares her soul to all who read her memoir – there is no sugar coating, and the echos of this memoir will remain with me for a long, long time.