Take a photo of a barcode or cover
anicolewrites 's review for:
The Strange Fascinations of Noah Hypnotik
by David Arnold
I try not to write negative reviews because its easier to say nothing, especially when I'm apparently in the minority here. But...sigh. Putting this one behind a spoiler warning, so you can scroll on past if you'd like.
Reading this book was like taking a quiet, moonlit walk in a familiar part of my hometown and stumbling across the hipster-haired, quirkier-than-thou, ungodly spawn of John Green and Wes Anderson (who has, quite obviously, been raised on a steady diet of "ironic" tv consumption, '80s pop culture references, and the soundtrack to Garden State) standing on the sidewalk in front of the local library, masturbating furiously to the thought of his own superior intellect while moaning out the names of his favorite philosophers and/or classic authors at random intervals.
I closed this book and my room immediately smelled like a heady blend of AXE body spray mixed with a half dozen IPAs and cheap weed.
Every time I turned a page, I swore I could hear a teenage boy drawling "Well, actually..."
I looked away for ten seconds and the hardcover was doing its damnedest to hop on a tandem bicycle with my old copy of The Perks of Being a Wallflower, determined to spend the rest of the summer riding cross-country to discover itself while learning a thing or two about opening its eyes to the kindness and beauty of strangers.
I have never wanted to fight a book so badly.
DNF at page 83, wherein our ever-so-interesting protagonist and co. are debating the merits of "bringing back 'duh'" and actual text includes "Sonic order, yo! Burrito or sammy?"
Spoiler
I can't do it. I physically can't. I literally sat this book down an hour ago after trying for the fifth time in two weeks to slog through a bit more of the narrative, and I lack the strength to pick it back up again. This book hits so many points of interest for me (coming of age story! sci-fi twist! BOWIE!!!) that, in theory, it should've been an easy five-star pick for me. But in practice? Ugh. NO.Reading this book was like taking a quiet, moonlit walk in a familiar part of my hometown and stumbling across the hipster-haired, quirkier-than-thou, ungodly spawn of John Green and Wes Anderson (who has, quite obviously, been raised on a steady diet of "ironic" tv consumption, '80s pop culture references, and the soundtrack to Garden State) standing on the sidewalk in front of the local library, masturbating furiously to the thought of his own superior intellect while moaning out the names of his favorite philosophers and/or classic authors at random intervals.
I closed this book and my room immediately smelled like a heady blend of AXE body spray mixed with a half dozen IPAs and cheap weed.
Every time I turned a page, I swore I could hear a teenage boy drawling "Well, actually..."
I looked away for ten seconds and the hardcover was doing its damnedest to hop on a tandem bicycle with my old copy of The Perks of Being a Wallflower, determined to spend the rest of the summer riding cross-country to discover itself while learning a thing or two about opening its eyes to the kindness and beauty of strangers.
I have never wanted to fight a book so badly.
DNF at page 83, wherein our ever-so-interesting protagonist and co. are debating the merits of "bringing back 'duh'" and actual text includes "Sonic order, yo! Burrito or sammy?"