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Meet Cute Diary
by Emery Lee
"I got so caught up in our meet cute -- in all the surface parts of our relationship -- that I never realized that, at a cellular level, we just aren't compatible. It was one of those perfect Instagram relationships, except beyond the pictures and the corny captions, we're just two people who have nothing in common and nothing holding us together. We're water and oil, but I kept trying to mix us because I'd gotten so caught up in an arbitrary measure of happiness."
Plot Points: Noah thinks he's figured out love -- he even has a 12-step list to guarantee how to lose a guy in ten days! Wait...that's not right...oh, yes. This 16 year old kid thinks he's developed a 12-step process to ensure true love. Because it's that easy, right? Of course not. But, Noah runs a Tumblr blog about the perfect meet cutes for trans people and then has his own meet cute when he meets Drew. On paper, Drew seems perfect -- especially compared to his coworker, Devin, who certainly makes a first impression. Shenanigans ensue, no character develops at all.
Love Triangle: Ugh. Yes.
New Characters: N/A
Slow Sequel Syndrome: N/A
Okay. This book was *not* the book for me.
I could say it's a generational thing -- but that's a cop out. I'm a Xennial (not quite Gen X, not quite a Millenial), and this is clearly a YA book written for a Gen Z young adult audience. Noah just drips disdain for anyone older than him, throwing cheap shots at millenials (including saying they're all over 40 and married). Which...No. Just no. But more than that, Noah is *obsessed* with his phone and his online following, making posts for attention rather than connection (as evidenced by his "attempts" to respond to his DMs and answer questions from his league of adoring fans). And he gets right pissy when anyone calls him out for being obsessed with the blog and basically ignoring real life.
I could say it's a relatability/connection thing -- but that's an insult to readers. Yes, Noah is a tri-racial (I think...? His heritage/culture don't really come into play here, except in some references to food his brother cooks) trans boy. And I am a white, cis, hetero-female. But identifying with a character isn't the basis for enjoying a book. That would rather defeat the purpose of fiction as well as the perks of learning and cultivating empathy.
And here's the thing. I'm sure this book will have a legion of devoted fans -- much like I am with anything written by Anna-Marie McLemore. Or the way I am with Kacen Callender's Felix Ever After. But I am not a fan of this book.
Here's what I think the book did well:
✔︎ -- I think it is so important for trans visibility and telling trans stories. Many of the characters are genderqueer and I think Lee does a really good job at helping normalize the language and vocabulary and the fact that not everyone fits into a socially-constructed box or label. I loved that I learned new pronouns, and I thought the strongest part of the book was when Devin and Noah were talking about normalizing pronoun identification. I also thought Devin's journey to figure out the correct pronouns was enlightening to read.
✔︎ -- I also think that this will be a really illuminating book for any YA reader who has misconceptions / idealized notions about love, especially in this digital age of Instagram where a static picture can be manipulated to give a false sense of how things really are. The perfect person for you isn't the person who seems perfect on paper; it's the person who gets to know you and understand you.
✔︎ -- I also really appreciated Noah standing up to Drew. Drew kind of vanishes from the story near the end, and this isn't explicitly addressed (because most of the characters are SO FLAT), but I was getting major abuser vibes from Drew. We don't get much about his parents' relationship except to know that it's on the rocks, and that it's probably his dad's fault. Which, to me, seems like there's a pretty good chance Drew inherited his abusive tendencies from his father, either because he witnessed it repeatedly (best case scenario) or because he was on the receiving end of it (worst case scenario). And I appreciated that Noah shut it down and walked away.
BUT. There was a whole lot about this story that I couldn't get behind. (Spoilery thoughts below.)
First: the whole Meet Cute Diary blog. The "stories" that were shared in the book were vague and sketched-out at best; Noah even makes a reference to them changing the details to maintain that appearance. (Because it's ALL FAKE. Which makes Noah just as much of a liar as all the people he accuses of that behavior and THE IRONY KILLED ME.) So how on earth can a troll figure it out, down to statistics and locations and data and numbers? IDK. I know Noah's only 16 -- and a very self-centered, narcissistic 16 -- but was he really not smart enough to change up the location AT ALL?! EVERY story is set in Miami? Really?
And how come there were never any real submissions? I refuse to believe this. People on the Internet had no problem hounding him for questions about his personal life but NO ONE EVER sent him their own submission? Or whined about it not making on? No, "OMG I sent my meet cute story to the blog 12 hours ago and he hasn't responded to me!! Whyyyyyyy?????"
I have questions.
Second: All of the secondary characters -- Brian, Drew, Devin, Becca -- are FLAT. They exist solely to further Noah's story and to fuel Noah's pissiness. The one character we know the most about is Devin and even then, all I can recall is that he's Cuban, he likes Starbucks, and he's incredibly thoughtful. THAT'S IT. That's all I know. None of these characters seem to have anything going on outside of their connection to Noah.
And you'd think it might get better near the end, but nope: even at 86% of the way through the book, Noah has to get em a present and realizes, "I realize I know nothing about em. Does e like anime? Stuffed animals? Memes? I literally don't know."
Third: Noah is insufferable. If I hadn't received an ARC, I would have put this book down at about 20% -- he was that awful. All he does, throughout the ENTIRE story, is complain and judge and snipe. He hates everything: being outside, reading books (manga is okay, but that's a momentary plot point that isn't really returned to except once, to paint the trashy white people as awful because one of their exes liked anime and "ew gross anime!" is part of their aesthetic), kids, getting his own job, paying his own way, apologizing, saying thank you, generally being a decent human being.
Everything in the book revolves around Noah -- and if it's not, Noah makes it about him. He calls his best friend after texting her angrily because she won't pick up the phone the moment HE demands her to (never mind her own life, right?) and he dismisses whatever she's going through to vent about his life.
Fourth: At first, I thought Noah's awfulness was part of a larger character development arc -- that it was all okay because he was going to have some huge humbling moment and come out a better person. Nope.
There's one time, about 70% or so through the book, that Becca (his best friend) calls him out on his shit. She lets him have it, saying he makes everything about him, and is a terrible friend. (AND HE IS.) And, while he does acknowledge it, he doesn't change his behavior at all. At the end (92%!!!), Noah & Becca & Devin are all out for boba tea and Noah snaps, "No, it's not okay!...You're both abandoning me, and apparently I'm the only who cares." And when Becca has the audacity to point out that Noah is the one moving to California, this is what we get: "And God, I know she's right, but that's such a fucking low blow. Yes, I'm the one who left her in Florida, and I'm the one leaving Devin in Denver, but it's not like I did it on purpose, or even by choice."
It is, once again, all about Noah -- and it's like he hasn't learned anything at all.
Fifth: Finally, I think one of the biggest things that bugged me about the lack of character development, is that the book seems to excuse/justify Noah's behavior and say it's okay for him to act like this.
He is an absolute jerk to his brother's girlfriend -- primarily because Noah is insecure and jealous (even though all he wants is to fall into a fairy-tale romance and only seems to be interested in spending time with his brother when it's convenient for the story) -- and there isn't any evidence to justify that. The girlfriend seems nice and the biggest issue with her is that she's white and enjoys "exotic food" which Brian is happy to cook for her. But then, turns out, she's a transphobe! So it's okay that Noah was nasty to her, because she's awfuler and he's the real victim.
SAME thing with Drew: Noah thinks he's in love with him and is using him to get his blog back its popularity -- but once they start really dating, he quickly gets irritated with how clingy Drew gets. Now, Noah may think Drew is perfect (at least at first), but there are plenty of signs that Drew is Not A Great Guy. So, again, when Drew's secrets are revealed and his true colors come out, it's all okay because Noah hates liars, okay? Noah is bad, but Drew is worse. (Even though, and I cannot stress this enough, Noah is literally lying to everyone on the Internet and even to some people in his real life.)
And it's not just the "bad" people: he is *awful* to both his brother, Brian, and to Becca -- and they both just excuse everything away. Brian says it's okay that Noah was awful to him, "because they're family" and Becca say's "You got caught up in your five seconds of fame. I get it," and that's it. Noah is exonerated.
Which...UGH. NO. That may all be true, but that doesn't excuse Noah's behavior.
And, again, Noah is no different at the end.
It is still all about him: "Tears slip down my face and onto her shoulder and I feel kind of bad about it, but this is my time to cry. I deserve this.
Or, when it comes to Devin, who organizes that amazing scavenger hunt and keeps bringing Noah free coffee and tea and baked goods because he is way too good for him: "Someone who knew exactly what I needed better than I did and who forgave me before I ever knew how to start asking for forgiveness?" Honestly, I know what Noah sees in Devin, but I have ZERO idea what Devin sees in Noah.
And finally: one of the things that bugged me from the start was Noah's entitlement. He spends $400 in one week on Ubers and Boba Tea and Chai Lattes for his blog/Insta aesthetic and image, and gets PISSED when his parents freeze his credit card -- and is super pissy that they dare suggest he get a job.
And at the end? When Devin says he'll drive from SF to LA to visit him? Noah says, "I'll pay you for gas,' I say. Not that I'll have a job, but I'm sure the bank of Mom and Dad can figure something out."
Of course Devin will be the one to visit him. And Noah clearly hasn't grown or learned anything, as the entitlement is still very much there.
Which, to be fair, is probably extremely accurate for a 16-year-old, but is extremely frustrating in a main character.
Update #1: 10% done
Ooof, y'all. This review is going to be a doozy because we're only 1/10 of the way through and I have so. many. thoughts.
Things that are bothering me right now:
--One: MC is the worst kind of Gen-Z stereotype: he runs a blog (Tumblr?), is *always* on his phone, is obsessed over his followers, and is mad at a "troll" who's basically calling him out for being a liar and doesn't seem to be at all concerned with the fact that the alleged troll is 100% right. Also, he gets pissy when the "troll" is being mean and when his brother tells him to get off his phone because, you know, he's out with people
--Two: He is judgy AF. Not necessarily a character flaw, but among everything else, it's just not cool. He's super mean to his brother's girlfriend who, barring any other information, seems nice and is trying to help him get a job:
"I turn to see Maggie smiling at me. She's got the thinnest lips on this side of the Pacific, but she makes it work with a touch of lip gloss." (Also -- is that mildly racist?!)
"I stare back at her blankly because working at a bookstore sounds boring as hell, and really, if I didn't want Brian getting me a job, the last thing I need is a hand-out job from his girlfriend."
OUCH.
--Three: He is wildly entitled and privileged -- and self-centered. His parents pay his "emergencies-only credit card" bill for him, and when he spends $400 in a week on "food" (re: rideshares, coffee, and boba tea -- so he can post it for the 'Gram), they freeze it. (Rightfully so.) Instead of apologizing or owning up or saying he'll cut back, he gets all indignant and outraged.
--Four: Again with the self-centeredness. He calls his brother and demands he come pick him up. (Despite living a mile or so away.) Brother is at orientation for his ACTUAL JOB and so, again rightfully so, says he'll pick him up when he's done. MC gets pissy that he has to wait. Instead of, you know, JUST WALKING HOME.
I really, really, *really* hope that this is part of a humbling character arc because right now, MC is so unlikable, it's hard to root for him. Definitely NOT the same vibes as Felix Ever After.
**I received an ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Plot Points: Noah thinks he's figured out love -- he even has a 12-step list to guarantee how to lose a guy in ten days! Wait...that's not right...oh, yes. This 16 year old kid thinks he's developed a 12-step process to ensure true love. Because it's that easy, right? Of course not. But, Noah runs a Tumblr blog about the perfect meet cutes for trans people and then has his own meet cute when he meets Drew. On paper, Drew seems perfect -- especially compared to his coworker, Devin, who certainly makes a first impression. Shenanigans ensue, no character develops at all.
Love Triangle: Ugh. Yes.
New Characters: N/A
Slow Sequel Syndrome: N/A
Okay. This book was *not* the book for me.
I could say it's a generational thing -- but that's a cop out. I'm a Xennial (not quite Gen X, not quite a Millenial), and this is clearly a YA book written for a Gen Z young adult audience. Noah just drips disdain for anyone older than him, throwing cheap shots at millenials (including saying they're all over 40 and married). Which...No. Just no. But more than that, Noah is *obsessed* with his phone and his online following, making posts for attention rather than connection (as evidenced by his "attempts" to respond to his DMs and answer questions from his league of adoring fans). And he gets right pissy when anyone calls him out for being obsessed with the blog and basically ignoring real life.
I could say it's a relatability/connection thing -- but that's an insult to readers. Yes, Noah is a tri-racial (I think...? His heritage/culture don't really come into play here, except in some references to food his brother cooks) trans boy. And I am a white, cis, hetero-female. But identifying with a character isn't the basis for enjoying a book. That would rather defeat the purpose of fiction as well as the perks of learning and cultivating empathy.
And here's the thing. I'm sure this book will have a legion of devoted fans -- much like I am with anything written by Anna-Marie McLemore. Or the way I am with Kacen Callender's Felix Ever After. But I am not a fan of this book.
Here's what I think the book did well:
✔︎ -- I think it is so important for trans visibility and telling trans stories. Many of the characters are genderqueer and I think Lee does a really good job at helping normalize the language and vocabulary and the fact that not everyone fits into a socially-constructed box or label. I loved that I learned new pronouns, and I thought the strongest part of the book was when Devin and Noah were talking about normalizing pronoun identification. I also thought Devin's journey to figure out the correct pronouns was enlightening to read.
✔︎ -- I also think that this will be a really illuminating book for any YA reader who has misconceptions / idealized notions about love, especially in this digital age of Instagram where a static picture can be manipulated to give a false sense of how things really are. The perfect person for you isn't the person who seems perfect on paper; it's the person who gets to know you and understand you.
✔︎ -- I also really appreciated Noah standing up to Drew. Drew kind of vanishes from the story near the end, and this isn't explicitly addressed (because most of the characters are SO FLAT), but I was getting major abuser vibes from Drew. We don't get much about his parents' relationship except to know that it's on the rocks, and that it's probably his dad's fault. Which, to me, seems like there's a pretty good chance Drew inherited his abusive tendencies from his father, either because he witnessed it repeatedly (best case scenario) or because he was on the receiving end of it (worst case scenario). And I appreciated that Noah shut it down and walked away.
BUT. There was a whole lot about this story that I couldn't get behind. (Spoilery thoughts below.)
First: the whole Meet Cute Diary blog. The "stories" that were shared in the book were vague and sketched-out at best; Noah even makes a reference to them changing the details to maintain that appearance. (Because it's ALL FAKE. Which makes Noah just as much of a liar as all the people he accuses of that behavior and THE IRONY KILLED ME.) So how on earth can a troll figure it out, down to statistics and locations and data and numbers? IDK. I know Noah's only 16 -- and a very self-centered, narcissistic 16 -- but was he really not smart enough to change up the location AT ALL?! EVERY story is set in Miami? Really?
And how come there were never any real submissions? I refuse to believe this. People on the Internet had no problem hounding him for questions about his personal life but NO ONE EVER sent him their own submission? Or whined about it not making on? No, "OMG I sent my meet cute story to the blog 12 hours ago and he hasn't responded to me!! Whyyyyyyy?????"
I have questions.
Second: All of the secondary characters -- Brian, Drew, Devin, Becca -- are FLAT. They exist solely to further Noah's story and to fuel Noah's pissiness. The one character we know the most about is Devin and even then, all I can recall is that he's Cuban, he likes Starbucks, and he's incredibly thoughtful. THAT'S IT. That's all I know. None of these characters seem to have anything going on outside of their connection to Noah.
And you'd think it might get better near the end, but nope: even at 86% of the way through the book, Noah has to get em a present and realizes, "I realize I know nothing about em. Does e like anime? Stuffed animals? Memes? I literally don't know."
Third: Noah is insufferable. If I hadn't received an ARC, I would have put this book down at about 20% -- he was that awful. All he does, throughout the ENTIRE story, is complain and judge and snipe. He hates everything: being outside, reading books (manga is okay, but that's a momentary plot point that isn't really returned to except once, to paint the trashy white people as awful because one of their exes liked anime and "ew gross anime!" is part of their aesthetic), kids, getting his own job, paying his own way, apologizing, saying thank you, generally being a decent human being.
Everything in the book revolves around Noah -- and if it's not, Noah makes it about him. He calls his best friend after texting her angrily because she won't pick up the phone the moment HE demands her to (never mind her own life, right?) and he dismisses whatever she's going through to vent about his life.
Fourth: At first, I thought Noah's awfulness was part of a larger character development arc -- that it was all okay because he was going to have some huge humbling moment and come out a better person. Nope.
There's one time, about 70% or so through the book, that Becca (his best friend) calls him out on his shit. She lets him have it, saying he makes everything about him, and is a terrible friend. (AND HE IS.) And, while he does acknowledge it, he doesn't change his behavior at all. At the end (92%!!!), Noah & Becca & Devin are all out for boba tea and Noah snaps, "No, it's not okay!...You're both abandoning me, and apparently I'm the only who cares." And when Becca has the audacity to point out that Noah is the one moving to California, this is what we get: "And God, I know she's right, but that's such a fucking low blow. Yes, I'm the one who left her in Florida, and I'm the one leaving Devin in Denver, but it's not like I did it on purpose, or even by choice."
It is, once again, all about Noah -- and it's like he hasn't learned anything at all.
Fifth: Finally, I think one of the biggest things that bugged me about the lack of character development, is that the book seems to excuse/justify Noah's behavior and say it's okay for him to act like this.
He is an absolute jerk to his brother's girlfriend -- primarily because Noah is insecure and jealous (even though all he wants is to fall into a fairy-tale romance and only seems to be interested in spending time with his brother when it's convenient for the story) -- and there isn't any evidence to justify that. The girlfriend seems nice and the biggest issue with her is that she's white and enjoys "exotic food" which Brian is happy to cook for her. But then, turns out, she's a transphobe! So it's okay that Noah was nasty to her, because she's awfuler and he's the real victim.
SAME thing with Drew: Noah thinks he's in love with him and is using him to get his blog back its popularity -- but once they start really dating, he quickly gets irritated with how clingy Drew gets. Now, Noah may think Drew is perfect (at least at first), but there are plenty of signs that Drew is Not A Great Guy. So, again, when Drew's secrets are revealed and his true colors come out, it's all okay because Noah hates liars, okay? Noah is bad, but Drew is worse. (Even though, and I cannot stress this enough, Noah is literally lying to everyone on the Internet and even to some people in his real life.)
And it's not just the "bad" people: he is *awful* to both his brother, Brian, and to Becca -- and they both just excuse everything away. Brian says it's okay that Noah was awful to him, "because they're family" and Becca say's "You got caught up in your five seconds of fame. I get it," and that's it. Noah is exonerated.
Which...UGH. NO. That may all be true, but that doesn't excuse Noah's behavior.
And, again, Noah is no different at the end.
It is still all about him: "Tears slip down my face and onto her shoulder and I feel kind of bad about it, but this is my time to cry. I deserve this.
Or, when it comes to Devin, who organizes that amazing scavenger hunt and keeps bringing Noah free coffee and tea and baked goods because he is way too good for him: "Someone who knew exactly what I needed better than I did and who forgave me before I ever knew how to start asking for forgiveness?" Honestly, I know what Noah sees in Devin, but I have ZERO idea what Devin sees in Noah.
And finally: one of the things that bugged me from the start was Noah's entitlement. He spends $400 in one week on Ubers and Boba Tea and Chai Lattes for his blog/Insta aesthetic and image, and gets PISSED when his parents freeze his credit card -- and is super pissy that they dare suggest he get a job.
And at the end? When Devin says he'll drive from SF to LA to visit him? Noah says, "I'll pay you for gas,' I say. Not that I'll have a job, but I'm sure the bank of Mom and Dad can figure something out."
Of course Devin will be the one to visit him. And Noah clearly hasn't grown or learned anything, as the entitlement is still very much there.
Which, to be fair, is probably extremely accurate for a 16-year-old, but is extremely frustrating in a main character.
Update #1: 10% done
Ooof, y'all. This review is going to be a doozy because we're only 1/10 of the way through and I have so. many. thoughts.
Things that are bothering me right now:
--One: MC is the worst kind of Gen-Z stereotype: he runs a blog (Tumblr?), is *always* on his phone, is obsessed over his followers, and is mad at a "troll" who's basically calling him out for being a liar and doesn't seem to be at all concerned with the fact that the alleged troll is 100% right. Also, he gets pissy when the "troll" is being mean and when his brother tells him to get off his phone because, you know, he's out with people
--Two: He is judgy AF. Not necessarily a character flaw, but among everything else, it's just not cool. He's super mean to his brother's girlfriend who, barring any other information, seems nice and is trying to help him get a job:
"I turn to see Maggie smiling at me. She's got the thinnest lips on this side of the Pacific, but she makes it work with a touch of lip gloss." (Also -- is that mildly racist?!)
"I stare back at her blankly because working at a bookstore sounds boring as hell, and really, if I didn't want Brian getting me a job, the last thing I need is a hand-out job from his girlfriend."
OUCH.
--Three: He is wildly entitled and privileged -- and self-centered. His parents pay his "emergencies-only credit card" bill for him, and when he spends $400 in a week on "food" (re: rideshares, coffee, and boba tea -- so he can post it for the 'Gram), they freeze it. (Rightfully so.) Instead of apologizing or owning up or saying he'll cut back, he gets all indignant and outraged.
--Four: Again with the self-centeredness. He calls his brother and demands he come pick him up. (Despite living a mile or so away.) Brother is at orientation for his ACTUAL JOB and so, again rightfully so, says he'll pick him up when he's done. MC gets pissy that he has to wait. Instead of, you know, JUST WALKING HOME.
I really, really, *really* hope that this is part of a humbling character arc because right now, MC is so unlikable, it's hard to root for him. Definitely NOT the same vibes as Felix Ever After.
**I received an ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.