Take a photo of a barcode or cover
reader_fictions 's review for:
Cam Girl
by Elliot Wake
I’m really struggling to decide how I feel about Cam Girl. On a lot of levels, I fucking love it. Leah Raeder’s prose is like nothing else, both gorgeous and gruesome. Her descriptions of art are out of this world. She writes some of my very favorite prose.
Cam Girl, like Black Iris which I loved, centers on fucked up people making bad life choices. Watching Vada make all sorts of horrible choices is painful. She’s both likable and unlikable both, which makes her feel pretty damn human. Despite the unhealthiness of her relationship with Ellis, I found myself semi-rooting for them, although I also rooted for Dane and blue, so maybe it’s just that Vada has ridiculous amounts of chemistry with just about everyone.
There are two mysteries of sorts within Cam Girl, both of which I found very compelling. The first is what caused the accident car accident at the start of the novel. The driver of the car, Ryan, died, and Vada needs to understand what was going on with him so that she can have closure, or so she thinks. The other mystery is the identity of blue, one of Vada’s clients in her work as a cam girl. I have a weakness for romances through letters or chats, and I found myself shipping this obviously unhealthy relationship which is testament to Raeder’s skill.
At the end, just the last chapter, things fell apart for me, unfortunately. Not enough to kill my enjoyment of the novel as a whole, because I still think it’s fabulous and would recommend it, but enough to keep it from being a favorite. These are all spoilers unfortunately, aside from the fact that I think the ending was too rushed and unrealistically happy.
The resolution to the car crash mystery was disappointing. Vada crashed their car sort of on purpose and sort of accidentally. This bothers me for two reasons: 1) Vada/Raeder intentionally withheld this information from the reader throughout the whole novel. This is such a cheat used to accomplish a twist that would otherwise be obvious. Vada thinks about the accident and how it’s her fault a lot, but conveniently never thinks about that part. Sure. 2) Apparently it’s all fine, despite the fact that she confessed this to the father of the murdered girl (I can correctly gender Skylar in here yay!). Max forgives her. Ellis does too, because Skylar was heading off to commit suicide anyway, so what difference does it really make? This strikes me as deeply uncomfortable in a novel so focused on mental health. A couple of intense discussions about the truth and it seems to be over and dealt with. Not to mention that Skylar as a character exists to serve as a catalyst for their change.
Ultimately, despite having been hoping that Ellis and Vada would work things out, I didn’t end up shipping them in the end. They’ve lied to each other so much, often seemingly needlessly, and it’s hard to imagine them coming back from that. Still, I thought maybe, until it ended with them completely perfectly happy and getting engaged. Couples don’t go from completely messed up to perfect just because they’ve finally been honest; they’re still going to have to work through shit. The ending was too idealized and felt out of place with the tone of the rest of the novel. It comes uncomfortably close to them being “cured” by truly admitting their love for one another.
Despite those issues, I very much encourage readers who are comfortable with pushed envelopes to read Cam Girl. It’s unique, covers important subjects, and will definitely make you think.
Cam Girl, like Black Iris which I loved, centers on fucked up people making bad life choices. Watching Vada make all sorts of horrible choices is painful. She’s both likable and unlikable both, which makes her feel pretty damn human. Despite the unhealthiness of her relationship with Ellis, I found myself semi-rooting for them, although I also rooted for Dane and blue, so maybe it’s just that Vada has ridiculous amounts of chemistry with just about everyone.
There are two mysteries of sorts within Cam Girl, both of which I found very compelling. The first is what caused the accident car accident at the start of the novel. The driver of the car, Ryan, died, and Vada needs to understand what was going on with him so that she can have closure, or so she thinks. The other mystery is the identity of blue, one of Vada’s clients in her work as a cam girl. I have a weakness for romances through letters or chats, and I found myself shipping this obviously unhealthy relationship which is testament to Raeder’s skill.
At the end, just the last chapter, things fell apart for me, unfortunately. Not enough to kill my enjoyment of the novel as a whole, because I still think it’s fabulous and would recommend it, but enough to keep it from being a favorite. These are all spoilers unfortunately, aside from the fact that I think the ending was too rushed and unrealistically happy.
Ultimately, despite having been hoping that Ellis and Vada would work things out, I didn’t end up shipping them in the end. They’ve lied to each other so much, often seemingly needlessly, and it’s hard to imagine them coming back from that. Still, I thought maybe, until it ended with them completely perfectly happy and getting engaged. Couples don’t go from completely messed up to perfect just because they’ve finally been honest; they’re still going to have to work through shit. The ending was too idealized and felt out of place with the tone of the rest of the novel. It comes uncomfortably close to them being “cured” by truly admitting their love for one another.
Despite those issues, I very much encourage readers who are comfortable with pushed envelopes to read Cam Girl. It’s unique, covers important subjects, and will definitely make you think.