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A review by _askthebookbug
What We Talk About When We Talk about Rape by Sohaila Abdulali
5.0
What We Talk When We Talk About Rape - #bookrecommendation
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Where do I begin? Regardless of how others found this book, it had a significant impact on my mind. We see about a thousand rape cases being displayed on the news channels every day but hardly give it a second thought. Because it's all so common. Rape is just another crime that happens without us having to pay it much attention. I haven't met any rape survivors and for that reason this book proved to be extraordinary. Sohaila is a rape survivor herself and who better to address this issue than the woman with the firmest voice.
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It's difficult to sum up such an important book partly because of its depth and also because rape has always been considered as a sensitive matter. So sensitive that victims are often asked to keep their stories a secret. Because women who are raped are forced to feel ashamed. I absolutely loved Sohaila's writing. It's unflinching and to the point. She doesn't like to beat around the bush. Yes, she was gangraped by a bunch of men when she went out with her friend. But she considers herself and many others as survivors and not the victims. In this book, she narrates and quotes the stories of few women whom she had the chance to interview. Be it Audrey who was drugged and raped by a group of men, or Manassah Bradley who was abused as a child or Cheryl who was raped by her highschool classmate: each of them recount their experience of being raped and how they were blamed for the act. Even though this book is about the experience and how to tackle it, it also stresses on closure.
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There are plenty of examples used to help people understand how simple it is to differentiate sex and rape. One woman says 'Rape is not sex. If you hit someone on the head with a rolling pin, it's not cooking' and also the classic narration of a woman who walks into a bathroom fittings store and relieves herself because the store gave out mixed signals about having displayed the commodes. Have you heard of the TED talk given by Thordis and Tom? Tom raped Thordis and when confronted by her later, he admits his mistake. It's stunning how few perpetrators admit their crime and work on it.
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In another chapter, the author talks about how sex workers cannot be raped. The narrative says 'good girls don't get raped; bad girls can't get raped'. So many words are taken from the mouths of other rape survivors and are presented to us, it's both appalling and fascinating to see how they decided to deal with it. It's impossible for me to jot down every single thing that intruiged and shocked me and so I'll stop here.
I urge you to read this. It's important and necessary for people to know what's right from wrong. Rating - 5/5.
~
Where do I begin? Regardless of how others found this book, it had a significant impact on my mind. We see about a thousand rape cases being displayed on the news channels every day but hardly give it a second thought. Because it's all so common. Rape is just another crime that happens without us having to pay it much attention. I haven't met any rape survivors and for that reason this book proved to be extraordinary. Sohaila is a rape survivor herself and who better to address this issue than the woman with the firmest voice.
~
It's difficult to sum up such an important book partly because of its depth and also because rape has always been considered as a sensitive matter. So sensitive that victims are often asked to keep their stories a secret. Because women who are raped are forced to feel ashamed. I absolutely loved Sohaila's writing. It's unflinching and to the point. She doesn't like to beat around the bush. Yes, she was gangraped by a bunch of men when she went out with her friend. But she considers herself and many others as survivors and not the victims. In this book, she narrates and quotes the stories of few women whom she had the chance to interview. Be it Audrey who was drugged and raped by a group of men, or Manassah Bradley who was abused as a child or Cheryl who was raped by her highschool classmate: each of them recount their experience of being raped and how they were blamed for the act. Even though this book is about the experience and how to tackle it, it also stresses on closure.
~
There are plenty of examples used to help people understand how simple it is to differentiate sex and rape. One woman says 'Rape is not sex. If you hit someone on the head with a rolling pin, it's not cooking' and also the classic narration of a woman who walks into a bathroom fittings store and relieves herself because the store gave out mixed signals about having displayed the commodes. Have you heard of the TED talk given by Thordis and Tom? Tom raped Thordis and when confronted by her later, he admits his mistake. It's stunning how few perpetrators admit their crime and work on it.
~
In another chapter, the author talks about how sex workers cannot be raped. The narrative says 'good girls don't get raped; bad girls can't get raped'. So many words are taken from the mouths of other rape survivors and are presented to us, it's both appalling and fascinating to see how they decided to deal with it. It's impossible for me to jot down every single thing that intruiged and shocked me and so I'll stop here.
I urge you to read this. It's important and necessary for people to know what's right from wrong. Rating - 5/5.