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A review by kiwi_fruit
The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver Burkeman
4.0
Interesting and thought provoking book. It deals much more with human psychology (touching on philosophy and religion) than self help. Burkeman explores a new approach to happiness called “negative path” which leads to some counterintuitive insights such as setting goals can lead to catastrophic consequences, seeking security to failures and the effort to try to feel happy is often precisely the thing that makes us miserable. Well worth a read.
Favourite quotes:
Faced with the anxiety of not knowing what the future holds, we invest ever more fiercely in our preferred vision of that future – not because it will help us achieve it, but because it helps rid us of feelings of uncertainty in the present.
Insecurity is the essential nature of reality – and all our distress arises from trying to scramble to solid ground that doesn’t actually exist.
Perfectionism, at bottom, is a fear-driven striving to avoid the experience of failure at all costs. At its extremes, it is an exhausting and permanently stressful way to live.
The real revelation of the ‘negative path’ was not so much the path as the destination. Embracing negativity as a technique, in the end, only really makes sense if the happiness you’re aiming for is one that can accommodate negative as well as positive emotions.
Favourite quotes:
Faced with the anxiety of not knowing what the future holds, we invest ever more fiercely in our preferred vision of that future – not because it will help us achieve it, but because it helps rid us of feelings of uncertainty in the present.
Insecurity is the essential nature of reality – and all our distress arises from trying to scramble to solid ground that doesn’t actually exist.
Perfectionism, at bottom, is a fear-driven striving to avoid the experience of failure at all costs. At its extremes, it is an exhausting and permanently stressful way to live.
The real revelation of the ‘negative path’ was not so much the path as the destination. Embracing negativity as a technique, in the end, only really makes sense if the happiness you’re aiming for is one that can accommodate negative as well as positive emotions.