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ciuli 's review for:
Noah Can't Even
by Simon James Green
1/5
No. Absolutely no. This book sucked. The writing style, the characters, everything made me want to cut my eyeballs.
I'm not usually one to give books such low ratings or bad revirws, but there is not even one single thing I liked about it.
The writing style was just a huge NO for me. It's childish, underdeveloped and rushed. Plus, I get that the author wants to give us the idea of 'poor Noah, nothing goes right for him, and when you think things can't get worse they actually do', but there is a thing as too much. First it was his best friend being gay and having feelings for him, then his mother being a bitch, then we found it he has a sibling he didn't know about, then the pregnancy,then his father being a scumbag and so on and so on. Just stop. I think the idea for this plot was cute and nice, the idea of a teenager who doesn't really have a place he can call home, who suddenly finds out that his best friend is gay and has feelings for him, the whole thing making him even more insecure about himself and the need to find out who he really is. But there is just too much drama and not even welldeveloped!
Let's talk about the characters. Because maybe there was a chance that the characters could have saved the book but no, this is not the case.
We have Noah, our protagonist who is a very naive and kind of annoying 15-year-old, who has been bullied for ages due to some unfortunate things that happened in his past and, living in a small town, everyone knows about them.
There is Sophie, but I still don't get why she was there in the first place. She is useless. Like, she gets introduced and then 3 days later she moves to another city and that's it. I mean, what was the point of her character.
And then there is Harry. Young nice Harry. Do you want to know which character I loathed the most throughout the whole book? Even more than Noah's parents? Well, that award goes to Harry. I hated him so much I don't even know how to properly explain my hate for him. He claims to be this good person he just really is not. He kisses Noah and tells him his feelings out of nowhere and he just expects Noah to suddenly understand the meaning of life and be okay with it, and love him just as much as he loves him. But when Noah admits that he doesn't really know what he feels, he can't stand it. Noah just asked him for time to think about it, but he kept pushing and pushing, like it was his right to be liked back by Noah. he himself admits that, of course, he had time to think about it and realize that he was gay, but he doesn't give Noah even one day to think about it himself. And he KNOWS how naive Noah is, and that he probably never thought about his sexuality in the first place.
When Noah accepts Eric's blackmail and buys the video I was so upset that Harry reacted that way. I mean, I understand his pov, he's saying "you just bought it because you don't want people to know you're gay, and you're ashame of me". I get it. But he didn't even stop to think that Noah, not even being sure of his sexuality, maybe wanted to make that sure before having even more rumours spreading about it.
And when Noah goes to him the first time asking for help after their discussion, and he just turns away from him, that was really bullshit. I get that your feelings are hurt, but he is still supposed to be your best friend. And he just turns his back on him. It's like he's saying 'either you like me or I won't help you anymore'. That was his shittiest moment imo.
Anyway, sorry for the long babbling, but I had to express my feelings about this book.
If you're looking for a nice gay romance, don't read this book.
No. Absolutely no. This book sucked. The writing style, the characters, everything made me want to cut my eyeballs.
I'm not usually one to give books such low ratings or bad revirws, but there is not even one single thing I liked about it.
The writing style was just a huge NO for me. It's childish, underdeveloped and rushed. Plus, I get that the author wants to give us the idea of 'poor Noah, nothing goes right for him, and when you think things can't get worse they actually do', but there is a thing as too much. First it was his best friend being gay and having feelings for him, then his mother being a bitch, then we found it he has a sibling he didn't know about, then the pregnancy,then his father being a scumbag and so on and so on. Just stop. I think the idea for this plot was cute and nice, the idea of a teenager who doesn't really have a place he can call home, who suddenly finds out that his best friend is gay and has feelings for him, the whole thing making him even more insecure about himself and the need to find out who he really is. But there is just too much drama and not even welldeveloped!
Let's talk about the characters. Because maybe there was a chance that the characters could have saved the book but no, this is not the case.
We have Noah, our protagonist who is a very naive and kind of annoying 15-year-old, who has been bullied for ages due to some unfortunate things that happened in his past and, living in a small town, everyone knows about them.
There is Sophie, but I still don't get why she was there in the first place. She is useless. Like, she gets introduced and then 3 days later she moves to another city and that's it. I mean, what was the point of her character.
And then there is Harry. Young nice Harry. Do you want to know which character I loathed the most throughout the whole book? Even more than Noah's parents? Well, that award goes to Harry. I hated him so much I don't even know how to properly explain my hate for him. He claims to be this good person he just really is not. He kisses Noah and tells him his feelings out of nowhere and he just expects Noah to suddenly understand the meaning of life and be okay with it, and love him just as much as he loves him. But when Noah admits that he doesn't really know what he feels, he can't stand it. Noah just asked him for time to think about it, but he kept pushing and pushing, like it was his right to be liked back by Noah. he himself admits that, of course, he had time to think about it and realize that he was gay, but he doesn't give Noah even one day to think about it himself. And he KNOWS how naive Noah is, and that he probably never thought about his sexuality in the first place.
When Noah accepts Eric's blackmail and buys the video I was so upset that Harry reacted that way. I mean, I understand his pov, he's saying "you just bought it because you don't want people to know you're gay, and you're ashame of me". I get it. But he didn't even stop to think that Noah, not even being sure of his sexuality, maybe wanted to make that sure before having even more rumours spreading about it.
And when Noah goes to him the first time asking for help after their discussion, and he just turns away from him, that was really bullshit. I get that your feelings are hurt, but he is still supposed to be your best friend. And he just turns his back on him. It's like he's saying 'either you like me or I won't help you anymore'. That was his shittiest moment imo.
Anyway, sorry for the long babbling, but I had to express my feelings about this book.
If you're looking for a nice gay romance, don't read this book.