Scan barcode
A review by thepetitepunk
Party Favors by Erin McLellan
3.0
You know what, there were fine scenes in this and it was a quick read, but man?? Why was the writing like that?? Help. I was laughing in places I probably shouldn’t have been.
Some favorite dumb lines that made me inappropriately burst out in laughter while reading erotica:
Amanda shot off the bed. “Need to pee. BRB.”
She was halfway down the staircase before she realized she’d literally said “BRB” out loud.
Hello why do we need to bring text lingo into this please stop.
A shiver racked Amanda’s body. “Yes. Please, Wren. I feel…”
“What do you feel?”
Amanda thrust her hands into her own hair and fisted it. She looked so fucking sexy.
“Like a cork that’s about to pop. Please, Wren. Touch me.”
CAN YOU IMAGINE SAYING “LIKE A CORK THAT’S ABOUT TO POP” OUT LOUD DURING SEX? SERIOUSLY. THINK ABOUT IT. TRY TO SAY THAT SEXILY. I DARE YOU. LMAO.
Even better.” Wren reached into her bag and dragged out a large green dildo.
“Is that Shrek’s?”
Wren laughed. “Yeah. I love this baby. It’s got a wicked head.”
This is a reference to a Shrek dildo mentioned earlier. Shrek dildo. WHY. I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS.
”Then I could open Myrna’s Closet, and wham, bam, thank you, ma’am. New Year’s resolutions—achievement unlocked.”
Do NOT talk to me unless “wham, bam, thank you, ma’am” is in your list of everyday phrases. I’m dead serious.
Sometimes, certain sentences are unnecessary. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk. Have a good day. (but other than the very strange dialogue choices, this was…average?)
Some favorite dumb lines that made me inappropriately burst out in laughter while reading erotica:
Amanda shot off the bed. “Need to pee. BRB.”
She was halfway down the staircase before she realized she’d literally said “BRB” out loud.
Hello why do we need to bring text lingo into this please stop.
A shiver racked Amanda’s body. “Yes. Please, Wren. I feel…”
“What do you feel?”
Amanda thrust her hands into her own hair and fisted it. She looked so fucking sexy.
“Like a cork that’s about to pop. Please, Wren. Touch me.”
CAN YOU IMAGINE SAYING “LIKE A CORK THAT’S ABOUT TO POP” OUT LOUD DURING SEX? SERIOUSLY. THINK ABOUT IT. TRY TO SAY THAT SEXILY. I DARE YOU. LMAO.
Even better.” Wren reached into her bag and dragged out a large green dildo.
“Is that Shrek’s?”
Wren laughed. “Yeah. I love this baby. It’s got a wicked head.”
This is a reference to a Shrek dildo mentioned earlier. Shrek dildo. WHY. I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS.
”Then I could open Myrna’s Closet, and wham, bam, thank you, ma’am. New Year’s resolutions—achievement unlocked.”
Do NOT talk to me unless “wham, bam, thank you, ma’am” is in your list of everyday phrases. I’m dead serious.
Sometimes, certain sentences are unnecessary. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk. Have a good day. (but other than the very strange dialogue choices, this was…average?)