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A review by andreathereader
Reasons to Breathe by Mandy Muse
2.0
This is a repeat of my review of the first book, which includes both books:
This is a good story overall, but the terrible, terrible, grammar was a real problem. Constant tense changes, often within the same sentence, missing words, additional words, misplaced quotation marks... Honestly, the whole thing was a mess.
The plot is good, and with some serious editing, this could be an amazing book. One of the plot points is conveniently dealt with off page, in a 'perfect world' wrap up in the final chapter of the second book, which is a disappointment, but I think everything else is dealt with in a realistic way, especially Jane's grief.
The guys waffle a bit in their feelings and desires, which is annoying to the reader and Jane, and a lot of conflict could have been avoided if everyone just talked to each other, which is one of my personal pet peeves.
I think the writing lacked a lot of emotion, and maybe this was the bad grammar, but I feel more like I was being told how everyone felt instead of being immersed in, and feeling the things they did. Perhaps with the messy writing fixed, this would be less of an issue.
Honestly, unless the author invests in a serious editor and proofer (and not just one of her friends, as indicated in the acknowledgements in the first book), I won't read another book by her.
This is a good story overall, but the terrible, terrible, grammar was a real problem. Constant tense changes, often within the same sentence, missing words, additional words, misplaced quotation marks... Honestly, the whole thing was a mess.
The plot is good, and with some serious editing, this could be an amazing book. One of the plot points is conveniently dealt with off page, in a 'perfect world' wrap up in the final chapter of the second book, which is a disappointment, but I think everything else is dealt with in a realistic way, especially Jane's grief.
The guys waffle a bit in their feelings and desires, which is annoying to the reader and Jane, and a lot of conflict could have been avoided if everyone just talked to each other, which is one of my personal pet peeves.
I think the writing lacked a lot of emotion, and maybe this was the bad grammar, but I feel more like I was being told how everyone felt instead of being immersed in, and feeling the things they did. Perhaps with the messy writing fixed, this would be less of an issue.
Honestly, unless the author invests in a serious editor and proofer (and not just one of her friends, as indicated in the acknowledgements in the first book), I won't read another book by her.