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A review by kimball_hansen
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Sue Johnson
4.0
I don't know how I discovered this book but it was pretty good. And as far as marriage books go and people struggling in their relationship this will be a useful tool provided that you actually want to do something positive in restoring the relationships. This book had plenty of scientific studies that showed the benefits of having a great marriage and partner. For example, having someone you can rely on for connection and support makes healing from trauma easier.
It also sounded like one of the books that [a:Brené Brown|162578|Brené Brown|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1246473726p2/162578.jpg] got her vulnerability material from.
Some notes I took:
When we feel safely connected to others we understand ourselves better and like ourselves more. Simply put, you can't be your best self, alone. The neat thing is also that the more we can reach out to our partners the more separate and independent we can become ourselves. This is a good thing because no one likes a partner that can't exist or doesn't have a life without their Better Half.
Having close ties to others is vital to every aspect of our health. I think this is generally true for most people unless, of course, if you're [b:The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit|30687200|The Stranger in the Woods The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit|Michael Finkel|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1474560136s/30687200.jpg|51228990].
Love isn't the icing on the cake of life but a fundamental need.
Most fights in a relationship are really protests of our emotional disconnection.
When marriages fail it's not because of increasing conflict, it is because of decreasing emotional responsiveness and affection.
Spontaneous touching is a sign of a healthy relationship.
People need to discover and confront their raw spots.
The amygdala is designed to allow for adding new information but not to easily remove it. Hence fear is so powerful and stays with us. The amygdala maintains a record of emotional events.
It also sounded like one of the books that [a:Brené Brown|162578|Brené Brown|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1246473726p2/162578.jpg] got her vulnerability material from.
Some notes I took:
When we feel safely connected to others we understand ourselves better and like ourselves more. Simply put, you can't be your best self, alone. The neat thing is also that the more we can reach out to our partners the more separate and independent we can become ourselves. This is a good thing because no one likes a partner that can't exist or doesn't have a life without their Better Half.
Having close ties to others is vital to every aspect of our health. I think this is generally true for most people unless, of course, if you're [b:The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit|30687200|The Stranger in the Woods The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit|Michael Finkel|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1474560136s/30687200.jpg|51228990].
Love isn't the icing on the cake of life but a fundamental need.
Most fights in a relationship are really protests of our emotional disconnection.
When marriages fail it's not because of increasing conflict, it is because of decreasing emotional responsiveness and affection.
Spontaneous touching is a sign of a healthy relationship.
People need to discover and confront their raw spots.
The amygdala is designed to allow for adding new information but not to easily remove it. Hence fear is so powerful and stays with us. The amygdala maintains a record of emotional events.