A review by ashurah
The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love by Janet W. Hardy, Dossie Easton

informative reflective medium-paced

4.25

A very informative book for those who are interested in or curious about nonmonogamy. Hardy and Easton explain it in a very inclusive and succinct manner. It's still a good read even if you are monogomous—there are exercises that work for all types of relationships relating to topics like jealousy, communication, and sexual needs.

The only criticism I have is that, although the authors taking great care to do so, it could be more intersectional/inclusive. For example, the authors only mention asexuality and aromanticism in a small section and the topic of race is barely mentioned. Most of the anecdotes used are very similar and relate to sexual encounters; it almost gives off the impression that the situations within these anecdotes are the "proper" way to experience nonmonogamy. For people who aren't in the typical audience the book can feel tone deaf at best, alienating at worst. I wish that the authors included more reflection on how a monogamous society affects our views of relationships and more anecdotes about building non-sexual relationships (i.e. questions to ask on dates, emotional connections, etc), rather than just initiating (most likely sexual) relationships.

For people who are more knowledgeable about nonmonogamy this book may not provide you with deeper insights, as it mostly acts as a primer for people who want to pursue or are new to polyamory. However, it's very good for those who don't have an idea of where to start.
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